Single In The Suburbs:Your Exit Strategy

Love, Self

If you are a suburban single in sweatpants, try these tips to create success in any dating scene!

Awww, suburbia! Garages, yards, good public schools, sidewalks you can walk on, and when it comes to some places—like my home town in North Jersey--seven major shopping malls in a twenty-five mile radius!

Parents and grandparents asking young people when they are going to get married? All the time!

A singles scene that inspires you to get out of your sweatpants? Not so much!

Yet with the increase of adult children living at home with their parents and the considerable divorce rate, it’s clear that there are, in fact, actual singles living in suburbs throughout the nation. However, if you are single in suburbia, you are probably aware that actually finding half-way dateable singles can be as difficult as finding a parking space in, you know, Hoboken, NJ!

Whether you are looking or not, love will be more likely to find you if you master the following.

Makeover your mindset: Unlike parking spaces, the good ones are not all taken—you just think they are, and your negativity is attracting the wrong types to you. If you stay optimistic, you’ll greatly increase your chances of attracting and maintaining a relationship with someone who is perfect for you!

Get out of that rut: If you hang out with the same three friends every weekend and frequent the same three bars, it’s time to make a change! Venture to nearby towns to discover new possibilities. Remember to put effort into looking your best and making a stellar first impression. In initial meetings and early stages of dating, image is everything.

Don’t be too cool for Facebook. In case you live under a rock and haven’t noticed all the lovely wedding announcements in community newspapers--like, ahem,  Passaic Valley Today for my Jersey Girls--a lot of people marry their high school sweethearts, enemies, and friends. If you reconnect with your past and increase your social network, you just might discover that common background is correlated with romance and compatibility.

Embrace online dating. Go Speed Dating too--while you are at it! These days, it seems like everyone knows someone who met their significant other on If you can be open-minded, cautious, and strategic, you’ll instantly and exponentially increase the number of dating prospects. If you don’t know where to begin or can’t create a decent profile, hire an expert. (Hint, hint!)

If all else fails, visit a major city like NYC more often. (They don’t call it Sex & The City for nothing!) Good luck in your search!

If you need help dealing with dating in suburbia, send an email to

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