Chivarly Isn't Dead — You're Just Settling

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Is Chivalry Dead? Why You Shouldn't Settle In Your Relationship

Just because you've dated a few frogs doesn't mean you should lose hope on finding real romance.

Only once in my life have I been on what I considered the perfect date. Unfortunately, that came at the wrong time, and I know I’ll watch as another lucky girl hits the jackpot, but there are some mistakes we must learn to live with.

Chivalry by definition is the combination of qualities expected of an ideal knight and shining armor. For the hopeless romantics of the world who seek this in another human being, we know one thing to be true…how rare it is.

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We live in a generation in which we want immediate gratification; things come easy to us, with the help of technology. We can get cabs in a matter of minutes, we can get food delivered to us and we can even find an attractive person within miles of us.

But what does having everything we could dream at the touch of our fingers mean for society?

What it means is people learn to settle. We think no one will ever reach these standards we set so high, but instead of your thought process being: let me lower them, it should be: let me keep these as high as they are and wait for the person to reach me.

If they aren’t taking you on a date, it’s because they don’t want to date you.

Girls we need to stop meeting for drinks, falling for the late texts and drunken hookups. Backs peddle a bit and ask yourself when the last time was you actually went on a date?

If they aren’t picking you up, don’t bother going.

I know the concept of not driving yourself somewhere, seems weird, but the guy better at least offer to pick you up if you do decide to drive.

If they aren’t opening your doors, open it yourself and go.

I remember once I went on a date, as we lay there that night he said, “you know I considered opening the door for you, but I didn’t want to seem like I was trying so hard.” That relationship was about as successful as Britney Spears acting career. Newsflash to men….try. Try very hard.

If they aren’t pulling out your chair, don’t bother sitting down.

Guys, you don’t look like an idiot, what will happen is you will make everyone else in the restaurant look bad for not having done so as well.

If they aren’t taking your coat, it better be because it’s summer and you aren’t wearing one.

Sometimes I just wear a coat out even when it is warm just to see if a guy will, in fact, take it….very few have.

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If they aren’t paying for your meal, it better be because his father owns the place.

For me I can let doors close and coats unhung go. But paying for the meal is the most important aspect of a date. I am completely capable of paying for my own meal, if I wasn’t, I wouldn’t be on a date and probably working. It is the principal of the matter. It is showing whomever you are out with “I’m at least trying.”

If they aren’t walking you to the door, don’t let them through it.

Especially in this day in age with technology ruining people and therefore ruining relationships, guys have this idea, they take you out and it’s a ticket to your bedroom. First dates are just that, first dates. Don’t expect anything.

If they aren’t calling or texting you that night, it better be because their phone broke.

I don’t know who came up with waiting two days, but if you have a great time with someone let them know. Guys if a girl judges you for not playing games, go let her play one with someone else.

If they aren’t bringing you to meet their parents it’s because they are bringing their parents to meet you.

If it’s going well, they should want you to meet their parents. They should want to tell everyone about you. If they are keeping it a secret, I am going to let you in on one, LEAVE.

If they aren’t introducing you to their friends, assume they don’t have any and end it.

If they like you, they are telling their friends about you. If they don’t like you they are laughing to their friends about you and you will never meet them.

If they don’t have someone bringing you flowers, it's because they are personally delivering them to you.

Every girl deserves flowers and if a guy isn’t bringing them to you, kick him to the curb and go buy your own.

Ladies don’t settle. And gentlemen, the few we have left that lead a life of chivalry. Just because some girl has hurt you for your ways please don’t change. For it’s the people who play games that end up alone. Always remember it is the nice guys that finish first.

RELATED: Yes, You Can Be A Feminist And Expect Chivalry From Men

This article was originally published at Pucker Mob. Reprinted with permission from the author.