Create An Extraordinary Connection With A Guy By Using 5 Secret Tantra Techniques

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Dating the Tantric Way: 5 Tips to Create Extraordinary Connection

It's called tantric dating — and it works.

Dating can be fun, scary, confusing, and exciting. There is a whole gambit of emotions that arise when we are meeting new people. However, with this excitement comes a tendency to get stuck in our head which results in not being present to the person in front of us. 

The good news is there is another way — the way of Tantric dating! How can Tantra help my dating life, you may ask? Yes, Tantra is about so much more than having great sex. It’s about connecting deeply with yourself and another, no matter how long you’ve been dating that person.

Wouldn't it be nice to be completely present with your date instead of wondering where the relationship is going? Wouldn't it be great to make the most of your time with a person and instead of worrying if this is the exact right person for you?

Tantra helps us drop out of our heads and into the present moment so that we may experience more joy and aliveness on the dating scene.

If you want to learn how to get better at dating with Tantra, try these practices to enhance your dating life:

1. Notice how you're breathing.

Ever notice what your breath is up to? If you’re like most people, your breath is probably pretty shallow, stopping around your chest and shoulders. Now, try taking three deep breaths into your belly. You may notice that by consciously breathing into your belly your mind starts to calm down.

Suddenly, you can begin to observe what is going on in your mind instead of letting your mind run the show. From here, you can notice when your mind is taking you out of the present moment and you can choose to bring it back.

So try this: Right before your next date, take three deep breaths into your belly. Let your mind slow down so that you can be present and have fun!

RELATED: 9 Key Principles Of Tantric Sex That Will Re-Energize Your Sex Life Now

2. Gaze into his eyes. 

Yikes, scary! Right? Again, if you’re like most people, you probably haven’t spent too much time merely gazing into someone’s eyes without an agenda. In fact, you may be wondering, "Why would I even do that?"

Well, eye gazing is one of the quickest ways to drop out of our minds and connect with another. Say you’ve been on a few dates with your newest love interest. This could be a fun and exciting way to drop into a deeper level of intimacy.

Try this: Sit across from each other and look into your partner’s left eye (the left eye refers to the receptive side of our brain; the part of us that allows us to be more vulnerable). Now, start to synchronize your breathing (belly breath if you can).

Notice any thoughts, fears, or discomfort that may be arising. Do your best just to observe these and reconnect with your breath. Practice for 1 minute.

Afterwards, share your experience with your partner. You may reach a level of connection you didn’t know possible!

3. Try synchronized spooning.

Who doesn't like to spoon? If you’re at that point in dating where cuddling is common, try bringing in some mindful Tantric practices while you’re cozying up.

Try this: In a spooning position, have the "big spoon" place their left hand on the "little spoon’s" stomach and right hand on the heart. Noticing the little spoon’s breath — the big spoon will begin to synch their breath to match.

Feel the rise and fall of the breath in the stomach and then the chest. Do this for five breaths and then roll over to switch places.

RELATED: 6 Cuddling Positions You Must Try That Go Way Beyond Just Spooning

4. Kiss consciously. 

Say you’ve been with your date for a few months and have taken your physical intimacy to the next level. It can become easy to rush through the "foreplay" to get to the "good stuff". Too often our lovemaking becomes goal-oriented, and we forget about staying present to the sensations of the little things!

Try this exercise: Take a few moments to kiss your date, consciously. Decide together that you will do nothing else, just kiss. Feel the sensation of your partner’s lips, the warmth of their body, the softness of their skin. Notice any urge to move things forward, pause, and come back to the present moment.

Stay mindful of your breath and allow your body to be filled with sensation!

5. Practice self-love — it makes you more attractive!

Just because you’re dating doesn't mean you can’t take time with yourself! Your relationship with you is the most important relationship you’ll ever have. No matter if you meet the person of your dreams tomorrow, you will always be with yourself first. So why not treat yourself as the love of your life?

Try taking yourself out on a date once in awhile. Do you enjoy the art museum? Do you like long walks in the park? Do you wish to treat yourself to something sweet? As you practice self-love, your inner beauty will shine making you even more attractive to your dates.

RELATED: How To Practice Daily Self-Care (Even When It Seems Like Life Is Way Too Hectic)

Dr. Elsbeth Meuth and Freddy Zental Weaver have assisted thousands of couples and singles create lasting intimacy and fulfillment in their relationships. Contact them today to find out how these intimacy practices can support you in your life and relationship.

This article was originally published at Urban Dater. Reprinted with permission from the author.