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15 Different Ways To Express Your Love That Aren't Sex, According To Men

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intimacy issues
Love

It's not all about jumping into bed.

When you're dating a man or are married to one, it can frustrating to try and figure out how to express love and please them in exactly the same way that they manage to please you. No, I'm not talking about sex, so get your mind out of the gutter and get back here in the land of love, romance, and affection if you please! Thank you very much.

When you're in love with someone, when you care about them, it can be hard to suppress the impulse to do little, tiny, things to make them feel happy, loved, and cared for, especially when you suffer from intimacy issues. But when it comes to best practices in terms of expressing love and attraction to men, it seems like doing something sexual is the best option. However, that's not necessarily what men think.


RELATED: The 5 Ways People Express Love (Plus, How To Identify YOUR Way)


While it might seem unthinkable, men are just as interested in simple acts of devotion and love that have nothing to do with anyone taking off their pants. That's right! While men love intimacy, they are just as touched by simple sentimental gestures as women are when we receive them.

Of course, this doesn't mean that the same sort of simple gestures of love that inspire and delight women also inspire and delight men. Sure, it's the thought that counts, but wouldn't you like the thoughtful gift you gave to your man actually be one that he loves too?

Well, you are absolutely in luck. While the guy in your life probably isn't likely to pen a list of thoughtful, fun, touching little ways that you could express your love to him that he would enjoy, there is one place where you can go to find out what is the most likely course of action to get him right in the feels.

Check out the tiny loving things these women did for the men of the AskMen subreddit and you might find the inspiration for your next public display of affection.

1. She takes care of you when you're sick.

"I was horribly sick with the flu. The kind of sick where it legitimately hurt to move. Seriously, the most sick I've ever been in my life. She surprised me by coming over with a care package of sorts. She made me a 'get well soon' card (literally drew a picture of a well on the card) and brought really good tea and soup over which she made for me, as well as some medicine. She helped me get in the shower, helped me get cleaned up, and stayed the night with me. You know how sometimes when you're sick, only one thing sounds good to eat? I got a late night craving for a cheeseburger and she drove me to get one. I still think about that almost every day."

2. She can cuddle.

"One time I sprained my ankle real bad playing soccer once and she cuddled with me on the sidelines to make me feel better. Cuddling is a great healer."

3. She gives you something you've never had.

"I know this sounds stupid but this is honestly the nicest thing anyone had ever done for me. I was drinking hot water out of a glass and was burning my hands. She asked why I didn't have a mug. Having been poor all my life, the idea of owning a mug all to myself was so foreign to me, I always shared hand-me-downs. I replied, 'I've never had a mug.' The next day, I saw a brand new mug on my desk. I was so happy. Life was hard back then. It's been 7 years now, and I still use that mug everyday."

4. Food, food, and more food.

"Pretty simple, but when she makes supper and gives me some to take for lunch the next day. Plus, she gets cred when everyone in the office asks WTF the amazing smelling food is."

5. She knows how to surprise you.

"I was flying back from New Zealand (to home in England) and was supposed to be picked up by my parents at the airport. But instead my girlfriend at the time arranged it with them that she'd pick me up (at something like 5 AM) instead. It was such a surprise and I was so happy to see her standing there at arrivals. Though I'm sure I looked past her a couple of times looking for my folks!"

6. She isn't afraid to give flowers.

"She bought me blue roses. I used to dream about them and I came home from jail (long story) and there was a vase of blue roses next to my bed. I cried hard."

7. She shows interest in things you like.

"By showing interest in something I enjoy and wanting to join me in it. When I first started learning how to play keyboard, my girlfriend at the time would ask me about how it was going and listen to anything new that I could play. Then she would send me songs that she enjoyed and I would try to learn how to play them. It was really great."


RELATED: 25 Love Proverbs That Perfectly Explain The Incredible Power Of Love


8. She's passionate about learning new things.

"I'm currently seeing a girl at my university. When she found out that I've been playing drums for almost a decade, she instantly demanded that I teach her. She's actually really really good (I don't tell her this, obviously, for fear that she'll realize she's better than me) and has taken to it so incredibly well... When someone you care about takes a particular interest in something that you're passionate about, it is something particularly special."

9. She pays attention to the small things in life.

"Married for over 5 years now and been with my wife for over 10. For me, the most loving gestures are the simple daily ones. For example, when we're both watching TV, I get up to refill my glass of water, I ask if she needs anything while I'm up. Or if she's at the grocery store, she calls and asks if I need anything from there. Or when I'm out doing errands, I pick up some flowers for her because I thought she might think they were pretty. Or when my wife just sends a text in the middle of the day that says, 'hi.' Those gestures may seem small and trivial, but it just shows that you're always thinking of your partner. My dad told me that falling in love is easy, being in love is a daily commitment and practice. I finally figured out what he meant when I met my wife."

10. She has no problem dropping everything for you.

"My girlfriend is amazing in that she is the most selfless human on the planet. Everything she does is done in an attempt to make me happy. She will literally drop everything just to be by my side if I needed her."

11. She reminds you of the good times.

"On our two year anniversary, she gave me a scrapbook filled with pictures and notes. I know it sounds corny but it was the best gift I've ever received. It was something that you can't buy and it is a constant reminder of all the good times we have had."

12. She lifts you up constantly.

"Last year, I was in a dark place: had lost money for school, lost my job because of this (worked a student job for the university we both attended), and was in a state of pure limbo. For my birthday, she saved up money for months. She was a college student working a part-time job, but she literally saved up her paychecks for months to reserve a hotel room 350 miles away, got me some prime baseball tickets, and personally drove me the entire way there. Then, when we showed up at the stadium for the game, she handed me $200 and said 'go wild.' I'll never be able to recreate how absolutely moved I was. In a moment of me being at my lowest, she showed me the greatest birthday, and one of the best days of my life."

13. She just gets it.

"Sometimes I get panic attacks, especially when I'm sleep deprived. She knows just how to calm me down."

14. She cooks your favorite meals!

"I was hungry, it was 1 AM and we were both lying in bed. All I said was 'wow, I'm hungry,' and she got up from the bed, got in the kitchen and cooked me something. She didn't go into the pantry and get me pop-tarts. No, she actually cooked. I was blown away."

15. She wants to make you happy.

"Bought me a game and promised not to complain on the amount that I played for 2 months... it lasted a month but it's the thought that counts."


RELATED: 15 Ways Guys Say 'I Love You' Without Ever Saying A Word


Rebecca Jane Stokes is a writer living in Brooklyn, New York with her cat, Batman. She hosts the love and dating advice show, Becca After Dark, on YourTango's Facebook Page every Tuesday and Thursday at 10:15 pm Eastern. For more of her work, check out her Tumblr.

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