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22 Real-Life Reasons People Ghosted After Their First Date

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relationship deal breakers after first date
Love, Heartbreak

These are the times you're happy he never called again!

Radio morning shows get more outrageous all the time, don’t they? And that is a very good thing.

In the town where I often work, there’s a feature on each morning where people ring up or email in about a first date they liked who isn't returning calls or texts and the morning show hosts call the person, ask what went wrong on the date that caused them to be ghosted, and try to set the couple up for a second date.

After several years of listening to these calls, I’m here to tell you — an anthropology study by a Harvard Ph.D. couldn't be any better. According to this informal research study we have ongoing in our town, I’ve been able to classify the "no second date" situations as follows.


RELATED: 9 Men Reveal The Food Dealbreakers That Make Them Run Away From A First Date


These are all true relationship dealbreaker stories, so read, laugh, and learn!

1. There is something about the person's body or lifestyle that is a turn-off.

  • The guy who didn't call back because she didn't shave her legs.
  • The girl who didn't call back because he had a mole near his mouth, with hair growing out of it.
  • The guy who didn't call back because she clearly lied about her age.
  • The girls (and this is a recurring theme) who didn't call back because they expected a classier first date because the guy didn't dress appropriately for the venue or because they weren't impressed by his line of work.
  • The guy who didn't call because the date progressed to the bedroom and she took off her skirt to reveal...cotton "granny panties".
  • One date ended up in the guy’s apartment and he turned out to have medieval paraphernalia everywhere — costumes, weapons, and even a suit of armor!
     

2. Someone’s behavior was a serious problem. 

  • They couldn't put their phone down during the date.
  • One person brought their mother on the date. Another woman brought along her newborn baby.
  • The girl who kept getting the odd feeling that her date's "apartment" wasn't really his. Turned out it wasn't: the gentleman in question was ashamed of where he lived and borrowed a friend's apartment to make it look like he earned more money.
  • The girl who said, "I love you" on the first date
  • The girl who talked incessantly about wanting to get married and have kids on the first date.
  • The guy who sat on the same side of the booth, fawned over his date, and showed up with way too many roses.
  • The girl who was on Facebook during the date, with a running commentary on what an awful time she was having. (Why did this person bother to call the radio program?). Of course, her date found her postings later.
  • Oddly enough, this has happened several times. The fitness buff who can’t resist commenting on everything their date eats, and won’t shut up about his own fitness regimen. Once they heard why their first date didn't want a second date, these people all did the same thing again, right on the air, angry that their date "felt put off because I take care of myself!" The observation that a first date might want to talk about something other than eating, weight, or their fitness regimen just Did. Not. Compute. Don’t be one of these people, whether your date has a weight problem or not!
  • The dude who had an obvious anger management problem, which became even more evident on the radio.

RELATED: 5 Oddly Specific But Completely Serious Relationship Deal Breakers


3. There are hilarious misunderstandings.

  • The one where the guy realized, halfway through the date, that his date was actually his boss’s daughter!
  • The Strange Case of the Disappearing Date: The guy stepped out to have a smoke (not a cigarette!), the police drove by, and he got carted off to jail!
  • The one where the female, who traveled a lot for work, put off questions about her job because she thought it was boring and didn't want to talk about it. Her date got the impression that her day job was a high-priced escort Happily, this misunderstanding was straightened out and this couple went on a second date.
  • The one where the guy didn't want to admit that he was spending his weekends in jail due to a DUI.
  • The one where the girl realized, halfway through the date, that the guy was the same one who had dumped her sister two years ago. (This one did not result in a second date.)

My conclusions, after a careful assimilation of the data: the "hilarious misunderstanding" category is the one most likely to result in a second date or a relationship if the two people are brave enough to get the problem straightened out.

But, as you can see, not all of these couples ended up on second dates, either. I would give the "hilarious misunderstanding" category a fifty percent chance of a second date, and that’s being generous.

Most people are horrified and angry when they find out why their date isn't calling them back. They all quickly decide they don’t want to see the other person again — either because they’re appalled by a thought or opinion the other person had about them that was clearly inappropriate or they’re just embarrassed by something accurate that the other person has pointed out about them.

Despite the old saying, "You can’t judge a book by its cover", it appears that on most first dates, at least one half of the couple can judge the potential relationship by its "cover".

If your first date isn't calling you back, the chances really are good that you aren't compatible.

Don’t feel bad. If he isn't calling you back, just remember these scenarios and be glad you don’t have to waste any more of your time. Something really is wrong, and no, it isn't always you.

On to the next date!


RELATED: 3 Ways Your Relationship Deal Breakers Make You Unlucky In Love


P.D. Reader is a student astrologer who blogs as The Thinking Other Woman.

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