6 Tips for Becoming an Irresistible First Date


Make a great first date impression and you'll get asked out for a second date.

You don't get a second chance to make a great first impression. This is especially true for first dates. And yet, so many people say or do something on that first date that ruins their chance at a second date. On an episode of Millionaire Matchmaker, two gay men were on a first date. One guy asked, "What do you do to relax on the weekends?" His date responded, "I read the paper and stay home alone. I hate people." Deal breaker alert! I mean, who wants to date a person who hates people? While that example may be extreme, people consistently sabotage first dates. The good news is that it’s very easy to make a great first impression.

Just follow these six tips for becoming an irresistible first date and see your luck change. 

1. Laugh

Most people are looking to connect through a common sense of humor. (Don't force it and avoid off-color jokes). Relax, have fun, be playful, and let your natural humor come through.

2. Neediness Is A No-No

Make sure you don't say or do something that makes you appear too clingy or needy. I once went on a first date with a guy who told me that he's lonely and can't wait to have a woman in his life. He then said, "I was hoping to spend the whole day with you. I have nothing going on at home." I don’t think so. 

3. A Little Mystery Is Sexy 

Don't reveal your whole life story on the first date. Ideally, you want to leave your date wanting more. The chase is part of the excitement of the courtship phase of dating. So, keep the big stuff for later, and just reveal enough to whet his/her appetite.

4. Be Positive And Stay In The Moment 

No ratting on exes, family members, or friends. No whining or victim talk. This is a first date. Keep the conversation upbeat and positive, and don't project into the future with your date. Just enjoy the present moment.

5. It's Not All About You

Listen well. Don't dominate the conversation with 'me' talk. Relationships are about 'us'. Show that you are ready for a relationship by the words you say and the actions you take. Which leads us to tip number 6…

6. Be Nurturing And Kind 

A nurturing woman is attractive. Show your caring, loving nature by the questions you ask, the concern you have for his comfort during the date. For example, if he spills his drink, take a napkin and wipe it up. He'll think, "She's so caring." A man shows his ability to care for a woman by being a gentleman, opening doors, holding out her chair, and taking her coat. As old fashioned as these things might seem to the 21st century dater, chivalry is alive and well. These seemingly archaic ways of relating to the opposite sex are quite relevant today.

Most importantly, remember to have fun and enjoy your first date. Any tips you'd like to add to this list? I'd love to hear your ideas.

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