6 BEST Tips For Dating After 50 (And Actually Finding Success)

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best tips dating after 50

When you're dating in your 50's and beyond...

At times, dating can seem like a young person’s game. All of the dating guides and advice you find online seem to be focused on people in their 20s and 30s. But what about the 50 and over a crowd? What does dating after 50 look like?

Dating is challenging, no matter your age, but things become more difficult as you get older. If you’re 50+, then you have to deal with dating partners who are more discerning than they were in previous decades. They aren’t just casually dating. They’re looking for serious companionship or a spouse to spend the rest of their life with.

The following dating tips will help you make the most of your dating experience:

1. Recognize deal breakers.

According to data gathered from thousands of online dating profiles in the 50+ category, there are 3 major "deal breakers" when it comes to considering whether or not to date someone:

  • Poor health (78 percent)
  • Financial instability (76 percent)
  • Not physically attractive (75 percent)

At first, this may seem a little harsh, but each of these problems can be addressed. If you want to make yourself a more eligible bachelor or bachelorette, you need to take care of your health, finances, and appearance. 

2. Find a network.

If you’re like most people, you’re busy with work, family, and other responsibilities. And considering that you probably run in the same social circles that you have for years, suddenly finding a new dating partner probably isn’t likely. What you need is a network that’s specifically designed for dating.

One option is to join a local group in your community (such as a co-ed tennis league). An even better choice is to develop a profile on an online dating site that’s specifically designed for people over 50 (such as OurTime).

Online dating is no longer taboo, and you’ll be surprised how many singles are in your area.

3. Stop talking about yourself.

Have you ever wondered why you go on a lot of first dates, but they never lead to any second or third dates? If you’re attractive, healthy, and financially stable, it may be that you’re boring to talk to.

Stop for a second and review your conversations. Do you spend the entire date talking about yourself? Try asking questions and see if you get better results.

4. Don’t bond over baggage.

Most people over the age of 50 have some sort of baggage in their lives. From divorces and deaths to past health complications and career problems, we all have our issues.

As tempting as it is, try not to bond over baggage on a first date. Stick to positive topics and steer clear of the negative ones.

5. Don’t rush into sex.

Dating and sex don’t have to be synonymous. In fact, if you’re anticipating sex on a first or second date, you probably need to reevaluate your priorities. Sex complicates relationships and you should ease into the bedroom if you want that to be part of your dating experience.

Take care of yourself and make sure you’re both ready before making that decision.

6. Have fun with it.

If it’s been awhile since you’ve been an active member of the dating scene, the best piece of advice is to just have fun. You’re going to go on dates with people you could never see yourself ending up with. You’re also going to interact with some people who sweep you off your feet and give you those teenage butterflies in your stomach.

Relax and don’t put too much pressure on yourself (or your dates). Eventually, you’ll find what you’re looking for.

Paula Mooney is the author of several books (most written under pseudonyms to protect the guilty). Her essays and articles have been featured in national print magazines such as Writer's Digest, and in major online publications like Yahoo, Examiner, and more.

Watch this video from 2nd Act TV about the do's and don'ts of dating after 50.