How NOT To Ruin Valentines Day This Year

chocolate heart and red roses
Love, Self

Avoid a Valentines Day disaster with these helpful hints.

While it's meant to celebrate undying love and devotion, Valentines Day can easily become a relationship disaster. No other holiday can so abruptly turn love from sweet to sour. And once "botched" it's yearly return can loom over a couple like a gathering storm. The good news is that with some thoughtful preparation and emotional savvy you and your partner can have a fun Valentines Day that's passionate and exciting.

On Valentines Day, it seems that nothing else matters. Love takes center stage and this is its moment to shine. Both you and your partner will play a role in shaping how the day turns out for you. For the guys out there, here's how you can show up as the knight who sweeps his love off her feet filling her with overflowing adoration for you.

1.Take the day seriously. Feeling the pressure that comes with the intense commercialization and marketing of Valentines Day, some guys push back by resisting the day altogether. They resent having to conform and meet some arbitrary standard that determines how much they love their partner.

While this reaction is understandabl,e it's guaranteed to make trouble in paradise. With this attitude, nothing you do will go well and your partner is sure to be disappointed. Do not fall into this trap.

If you have such feelings, keep them to yourself. Better to accept the what is than to fight against it. Embrace the day as a voluntary personal sharing between you and your partner not as an imposed obligation. Muster up your enthusiasm and excitement to show how much she's loved by you; it will count just as much if not more than any gift you give.

2. Remember it's a love day. Of course Valentines Day is about giving gifts to one another but the gifts are only expressions of love and affection. How you are with one another is far more important than what you give one another. Just buying a gift won't cut it. It's your day to be a romantic lover outside the bedroom. That means being affectionate, paying attention to her with caring and tenderness and a willingness to make her and the day feel special.

3. Get the right gift. For a lot of men agonizing over the right Valentines Day gift takes all the fun out of things. Don't let this happen to you. Remember you're celebrating your love for the woman in your life. Love, yours included, cannot be defined and captured by a material gift. So don't get paralysed with indecisiveness.

A good solution is to get more than one gift. Flowers and chocolates are the time tested symbols of love on Valentines Day. They should be a part of your offering. Having flowers delivered at home or at work (unless she's extremely shy) can be very romantic.

Next comes a more personal expression of your love based on what you know delights and thrills your partner. For many women this is jewelry of some kind. You should know what that is for her, if you don't, ask someone close to her. (Not knowing is a sign you're not an expert on the most important person in your life. Not good, start paying more attention.)

If she isn't a jewelry person, find out what she likes in place of it. Again this is something you should already have a good sense of. This love gift reflects your caring and thoughtfulness and the time and attention you've taken to please and make her feel truly special to you. Keep reading ...

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