How To Be Truly Honest When You're Dating (Without Coming On Too Strong)

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How To Be Truly Honest In Dating & Relationships

Whether you're dating someone new or in the fresh glow of a budding relationship, the last thing you want to do is come across as critical, harsh, or desperate when all you want to be is honest.

And it can seem that walking the fine line between being true to yourself and your needs while being receptive and loving to the other person is much like walking a tightrope 200 feet high without a net beneath you.

However, by implementing the following simple habits and practicing communication will flow more smoothly while dating, in marriage, and in all relationships.

Here are ways on how to be honest, which paves the way for healthy relationships:

1. Know thyself first.

The more clarity you have about who you are as a person and your values, goals, and needs in life the clearer it will be to everyone else, too, including someone new you're dating.

When you live in alignment with the essence of who you are you will magnetically attract other people who resonate harmoniously with who you are. And when you go into dating from this place of alignment, you will attract someone who you would be a good match with. And the rest of your relationship will flow with much more ease.

2. Ask open-ended questions that inspire a genuine and honest response.

Of course, you wouldn't ever want to assume you're on the same page without hearing it firsthand from your date. For example, how can you find out immediately if they are ready for a long-term commitment without sounding needy?

Ask them open-ended questions that allow for an honest response. Questions like:

  • "If you met your dream person, what would your ideal relationship be like?"
  • "What would you still love to do in your life?"
  • “Where do you see yourself 10 years from now?”

These are examples of simple inquiries that may elicit a deep response. What's even better is that you're asking the other person as an opportunity to genuinely learn more about them, not get the answer you want to hear.

3. The Sandwich Method of communicating feedback.

Say things have been going wonderfully but you hit a stumbling block.

Whether something just rubs you the wrong way or there is a bigger disagreement, try to avoid assuming the other person will automatically know this has occurred. There are circumstances when you will have to say something.

This is when The Sandwich Method comes in. It's an oldie but a goodie because it's effective and loving.

The first slice of bread is a statement of appreciation or a compliment. The content, the veggies or meat if you will, is the feedback you'd like to give or explaining how you felt when the event occurred. The second slice of bread is another statement of appreciation, gratitude, or compliment.

For example: "You know, you are so great about picking fun things for us to do together, but it honestly hurts my feelings when you forget to hold the door open for me and let it slam shut before I get through. But I still had the best time at the concert last night."

Even just saying it in the sandwich like that immediately diffuses the negative charge for the speaker and listener.

RELATED: 10 Ways To Be Honest — 100% Truly Honest — In Your Marriage

4. Agree to disagree.

Sometimes you will just have to agree to disagree. Here's the crazy part though...that's totally okay. Who knew?

Naturally, two different people will never 100 percent agree on everything. If it's in regards to something that will really affect the other person, then try your best to come to a win-win agreement.

If it's a smaller issue that doesn't matter in the long run, then you can simply both agree to disagree about it and let that be the end of it.

5. Send them love anyway.

And though it isn't the easiest practice to remember while in the thick of a disagreement or hurt feelings, trying sending them love. Visualize that person being filled with the bright energy of the highest love you can imagine and tell yourself you're sending love to them.

It's amazing how good it feels to send love to others without them knowing.

By continually practicing these five techniques you will more easily walk that fine line and be able to communicate honestly and comfortably while feeling grounded, strong, and true to yourself.

RELATED: How To Be Truly Honest (Even When It's Hard As Hell)

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Dina Robison is a soulmate attraction coach and creator of deliberate attraction online courses. Get her free video lesson The 6 Practices of Women Who Find Their Soulmate.