10 Fun & Creative Things To Do With The Person You Love When You're Bored

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Things To Do As A Couple When You're Bored For Deeper Intimacy In Healthy Relationships
Love, Self

Get creative!

Most relationship advice will talk about things to do as a couple in order to ensure that true love doesn't just fade or disappear.

You are dating or married right now and you want to keep your relationship interesting. You’ve experienced the loss of a spark in a previous relationship and your current partner seems to be losing interest as well. Perhaps you might be feeling like you’re the one losing interest in this relationship!

Why does this happen to a happy couple? How do you change your behavior and fix the recurring patterns in your relationship? Why do women (and men) lose interest? How do you bring back the spark and keep it exciting?

More often than not, a relationship might be losing the excitement because you are with each other a lot and spend every moment together. Perhaps you live together, which also changes the whole dynamic of the relationship. The feeling of being excited to see each other and thinking about that person all the time while giving you butterflies has gone away.

RELATED: 14 Things For Couples To Do When You're Bored At Home (That Can Actually Save Your Marriage)

This is called the "schoolboy" or "schoolgirl" phase of the relationship — you are just head over heels about each other and want to spend time together and you just love each other so much!

You might still want to spend time together and still love each other now, but that all-encompassing excitement is just not there anymore, which is not meant to be there 24/7 in the relationship. She just lost a little interest in you and has either told you explicitly or her actions show that it’s time for a minor adjustment in order to keep things exciting.

The thing that keeps relationships exciting when the schoolgirl phase is over is keeping up the mystery!

You’re probably thinking, "What? Mystery? I’m not into playing games!" No, that’s not what I mean. I'm not telling you to not text her back and be secretive about what you do after work or on your guy’s nights out. If you do that, then you're heading down another path that you should avoid. Keeping the mystery does not mean hiding your phone. Secrecy is not a good way to keep your relationship exciting.

Instead, flirt with her. Don't roll over and just accept the situation. Do something at home that sparks your interest.

For example, start a new project in the garage without having her know. Or if you like to cook, cook by yourself and have a glass of wine and then see if she joins you. Or join a salsa class by yourself and show some independence, which shows a bit of mystery!

Show her that you are into your time alone and this creates a little bit of separation. With separation comes mystery. You will introduce new excitement because you are changing the pace of how you regularly do things.

Changing the pace of how you normally do things and creating a healthy separation gets your partner wondering what’s going on. When she brings it up, just tell her that you enjoy doing these things. This is when she will recognize that you’re giving attention to something else — especially if she’s gotten used to getting a lot of attention in the relationship, which creates attraction and shows that you have a life of your own.

Yes, a woman wants to have your attention but we don’t want you to give up 100 percent of your life for us!

But, if lack of attention is an issue in your relationship, then that’s a whole different ball game.

You can find yourself in a relationship that is less interesting if neither of you put in the time, attention, affection, and communication a relationship requires. This might be a two-sided story or might be one-sided, but when these things are not being met, you can easily lose the spark in the relationship.

If you lack any of this in your relationship it makes you feel unimportant, disconnected and just confused. If a relationship stops growing and there is no novelty or spontaneity, you could get bored.

Now that you are out of that imaginary mind frame of how things used to be, you can work on bringing some of that excitement back. But before you do, if your partner has completely shut you off and is ignoring you, then it might be a time where space is needed in the relationship.

In order to have a healthy relationship and keep a relationship exciting, you have to learn how to grow from your shortcomings, but if your partner is not willing to grow then space might be needed until they end up taking the steps to initiate change in the relationship. You cannot force this and there is nothing you can do to control this.

You can master what attracts women but if the woman you are with now is not interested in being with you and is not giving you the time of day, the most powerful thing you can do to heal your relationship might be the hardest thing…and that’s to walk away.

Don’t worry though. You can get the spark back no matter what situation you’re facing today. Ultimately, it might be you needing time or space or you needing to try new things. Each relationship is unique, but whatever situation you are going through, these things can work. If you are not emotionally available in your relationship right, do so now.

It’s not uncommon for people to fall out of love with each other, especially after years of being together, but it does not mean that you cannot get this love back! It’s important to prioritize yourself and the evolution of your relationship now, so focusing on your well being and revamping the relationship is key.

Here are 10 things to do when you're bored as a couple that deepen the intimacy in healthy relationships.

1. Play games

If you're wondering what to do when bored together, start off with playing fun games at home like board games or card games. Don’t just turn on the TV every night.

Switch things up on some weekdays. Tickle each other. And (this might sound funny) play hide and seek and try to pop in and scare each other. Put on some music, have a glass of wine, and just dance.

There are many fun things to do at home. Often times, it’s the little things that keep a relationship interesting.

2. Role play

This also might sound silly but it brings so much humor when you do this. Role play and switch places for the night. In other words, you can be her and she can be you. Do this maybe for a good hour or two.

You will share so many laughs but also it can be a reflection of how your partner perceives you. It can actually give you an idea of the things you can adjust.

3. Get involved in a group activity

Join a group that you want to be involved with, or start something that you’ve been wanting to do for a long time. Think about learning salsa or public speaking.

Get involved in things that will make you push your limits and challenge yourself.

4. Try something new or that you haven't done in forever

Take each other to do different things like riding in bumper cars, bowling, skiing, sporting events, or indoor skydiving. There are so many romantic couple activities that you can both share and experience together.

Incorporate these new things into your date nights once a month or every other month.

5. Spend a few days apart

Give yourselves the opportunity to miss each other again. If that means going to spend time with the family or going on a weekend trip alone, then do it!

You want to create some space for both of you to miss each other.

RELATED: 6 Things To Do With The Person You Love When You're Bored

6. Re-engage in new communication

Want to learn how to be romantic? Ask questions and listen. How are you communicating with each other right now? What makes her glow with happiness? What makes her feel good?

Listen to the things that light her up and remember them. Use them in your day to day interaction with her as she will voice what’s important to her.

7. Start working out again

We sometimes get that extra few pounds of relationship weight. Now, it’s time to get that body back again and even if you never had it before, getting physically active helps with attraction. Get back in the gym and you’ll feel a shift. It improves your sex life and in a couple months, you might just be having the sex you once used to have together.

Trust me on this!

8. Change your style

What’s your wardrobe like? The way you present yourself plays a huge role in attraction. When she puts on a sexy dress you look at her differently, right? Well, how do you want her to look at you? Maybe not a sexy dress but definitely think about a nice collared shirt and slacks on date night.

Don’t let yourself go because physical appearance is so important in your relationship!

9. Challenge each other to break your routines

If every night you have dinner at 7 pm and at 8 you sit on the couch and watch TV till bedtime, it’s time to change this. Challenge yourself to break a routine every once in a while and do something else at home.

10. Reinvent your sex life

Changing your habits and putting your best foot forward will improve your sex life. Sex relieves frustration and releases hormones that make you feel closeness in your relationship and it, of course, keeps a relationship interesting. Consider buying a kama sutra book and working on new positions that you both want to try.

Talk about the things that both of you want and what you want to experience together.

Listen, a lot of people fall in love with the idea of being in love all the time.

This is what breaks a lot of trust and expectations in relationships. Become the man you were when she fell in love with you. Be better by always working towards your goals and the best possible vision of who you truly want to be.

Many couples experience this daily and the most important thing is to look at this as an exciting challenge. We cannot learn if we are never challenged, right?

So, see how you can take this opportunity to work with each other to turn this around and how you can change for the better throughout the process. It's easier said than done, but nothing worthwhile in life is easy.

That’s why everything requires work! When you work for it, it’s so much more gratifying at the end.

RELATED: 6 Playful Ways To Have Fun With Your Partner & Fall More Deeply In Love

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Apollonia Ponti is an internationally certified relationship coach who works with men to attract the woman they desire, build confidence, master their attraction skills and rebuild relationships. Find more of her expert advice by visiting her YouTube Channel, reading her Attract a Woman e-book, or booking a coaching session.

This article was originally published at Apollonia Ponti . Reprinted with permission from the author.