Valentine’s Day Is Only A 'Hallmark Holiday' If You Make It One

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romantic couple

Make this day about love!

When you think about Valentine’s Day, what typically comes to mind? For most, it’s roses, chocolates, and maybe even a fancy dinner together. But what it really brings to mind are romantic ways to show your love in your relationship, being sweet to your significant other, and sharing some hot time together between the sheets.

And then someone inevitably jumps in to remind you what a blatantly commercial holiday it "really" is.

But just how true is that?

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People often claim that Valentine’s Day is without substance, or that it lacks any real affection or emotional quality because it’s “forced” upon them and their relationship. And, sure, if you’re just going to buy some obligatory flowers and chocolate and give them to your partner or spouse just because you feel pressured to, then yes. It’s nothing but a “Hallmark holiday.”

But you’re seriously missing out on some amazing romance and the opportunity to show your love in your relationship if that’s how you feel. In fact, the only reason it’s a “Hallmark holiday” is because people do the bare minimum and nothing else.

But what can Valentine’s Day really mean?

If you’re anything like the modern couple, you’re having sex with your partner about once a week. Likely you have responsibilities or stresses that make you tired at the end of the day, whether it’s work, kids, family, or even outside responsibilities, so sometimes it’s hard to sit down and give you and your partner dedicated “us” time so that you can rekindle your passion together.

In fact, many sex therapists even recommend scheduling time together so that your intimacy doesn’t fall by the wayside in light of all of your other needs and wants.

And every year on Valentine’s Day, you have that opportunity. You have the option to sit down and ask your S.O. what they need from you and tell them what you need from them. You have the chance to feel loved, romanced, and cherished. To feel passion like you used to and to show your love for one another in new and exciting ways.

Scheduling time to be together — whether it’s to hang out and laugh or to make love — is not only smart, but it gives you a time to think about what you’ll do when you are together. When you’ve shut out the noise of your stressful world and selected that time to spend with the one you love, you can start to get excited by it.

Bad days just don’t seem as bad when you’ve got something to look forward to — especially if it’s a wonderful back rub from your spouse at the end of a long, hard week.

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And that’s what Valentine’s Day should be used for and why it’s an amazing day. It’s literally there to remind you to tell the people you love how you feel about them. And to remember to have some romantic time with your lover and remind yourself about why you fell in love with them to begin with.

If we’re using it to think about and celebrate the ones that we love, it’s an amazing day.

Unlike other commercial holidays, Valentine’s Day is the one that really doesn’t actually require anything. And, being a day that is entirely dedicated to love in all of its forms, it can be as sweet or as naughty as you want. It all depends on you.

If you decide that it's going to be a Hallmark holiday where you buy those flowers and chocolates and put no thought into anything else, then sure. That’s what it will be.

But even spending an evening on the couch together, or spending time with your family, or having a romantic meal at home instead of going out are all acceptable ways of spending this loving day.

And if you’re concerned that it’s going to be about consumerism and spending money, then agree that it should be a day where you don’t spend anything at all! Write your own sweet love notes, do chores or errands for your wife or husband, or even make them a personal book about all the things you love about them.

Throw in a sexy coupon book that you can print off (or write by hand!) at home, and there you have it. A day dedicated to reminding you to spend time and love on your partner that doesn’t cost anything.

We all need a reminder once in a while to stop and smell the roses — sometimes literally! And if you remember to use Valentine’s Day for its intended purpose, then you’re going to see that there’s nothing “Hallmark” about it.

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Merethe Najjar is a professional writer, editor, and fiction author living in Atlanta, GA with her husband and their rescue cat. She graduated with a degree in creative writing and recently had her first sci-fi romance novel Mercury in Retrograde published. You can also find her on her website, MeretheWalther.com, or follow her on Twitter and Facebook.

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