Reciting Your Wedding Vows While Having Sex Is The Hot New Thing

Photo: Instagram
marriage, sex
Love, Sex

Are wedding vows the new dirty talk?

Full disclosure: I'm not married, a Christian, or a reality star, but Audrey Roloff is all of those things. She's married to Jeremy Roloff from the reality television show Little People, Big World.

Photo: Instagram

On her blog, Beating50Percent, she gives helpful advice and tips to married couples

One piece of Audrey's advice has gotten some notice for being kind of out there, because her suggestion is that couples recite their marriage vows as they're having sex.

Say what?

Audrey writes, "Some of you may think it's a little weird, but I'm choosing vulnerability in the hopes that it might inspire you! This is something Jer and I have both committed to do on Beating50Percent: be honest and transparent. So before you roll your eyes and call me crazy, just here [sic] me out."

Before Audrey gives her advice, she gives the backstory on her and Jeremy's wedding, especially their wedding vows and how they wrote them the night before "intentionally last minute" so the vows reflected exactly where they were mentally, emotionally and spiritually present.

Photo: Instagram

Audrey liked their vows so much that she couldn't wait to say them again to each other on their honeymoon.

"We both brought our crumpled paper vows with us on our honeymoon [and had planned to reread them to each other again at some point," she says. "Then I had this crazy idea... What if we read our vows to each other while having sex?"

And so one night after they laid in bed waiting out a Jamaican thunderstorm and reliving their wedding day, Audrey put on her big girl pants and pitched her unconventional idea to her husband. "Babe, you know how we wanted to reread our vows to each other just the two of us? Well... what if we did that... while having sex?"

Apparently, Jeremy was game, and without going into details, Audrey writes, "It was the most intimate thing we have ever done in our marriage, and probably the most intimate thing I have ever done in my life."

Although the Roloffs haven't been married that long, Audrey already has a favorite thing about marriage: their oneness. 

Photo: Instagram

"The act of becoming physically and verbally one (at the same time) ensues an ocean of intimacy that I cannot attempt to describe... It's the best version of 'sex talk.' Don't think about how it works, just try it."

To me, it seems that if you're saying your vows while having sex, they lose their meaning and become merely sounds. If you're concentrating on saying your vows, you're not in the sexual moment at all, and I think it takes away from both the specialness of the vows and some of the pleasure of sex. You have to memorize and then recite, and that sounds more like a school assignment than an orgasm.

But I'm not a 24-year-old Christian, nor have I ever been on a reality show.