Tell Us: What Is Attraction Really About?

Two people at a restaurant.
Love, Self

What matters most when it comes to instant connection and long-term love?

We know that instant attraction does happen. Researchers at Syracuse University found that fire o' love's spark takes just a fifth of a second to ignite. When romance realization clicks together in the brain, everything falls together in an instant. So in theory, that could happen the first moment you meet someone—but that still means the attraction is largely physical. Your brain is in love with an appearance, but your heart probably isn't smitten quite yet. Falling In Love Takes A Fifth Of A Second

Over time, attraction changes. According to The Independent, women like to feel a sense of security, so many are ultimately drawn to men with status and wealth. Psychology Today reported that even though love at first sight has been reduced to a mere set of scientific processes, instant attraction as an indicator of a future stable relationships is mighty poor. Funny how that works out, eh?

For lasting relationships, it's all about the non-physical. Marie Claire's male blogger took an informal poll and thinks it has to do with things like sense of humor, kindness, money and intelligence. An eHarmony researcher told the Washington Post that the ingredients for a maintaining successful long-term love were shared personality traits like agreeability, spontaneity, outgoing nature and so on. If those match, the odds of a happy ending increase dramatically. Can There Be Love Without Chemistry?

Even still, it's all a bit befuddled because these lines often blur. The magic formula for an incredible relationship must fall somewhere between romantic attraction and non-physical characteristics. But where, exactly? We want to know.

YourTango is co-hosting a survey with Glo and to see what the real keys to attraction are. For the best results, we're going straight to the source—you. Take our questionnaire, then we'll gladly let you know exactly what that elusive answer really is.

What matters to you when it comes to instant and long-term attraction? 

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