3 Ways To Survive Being The Last Of Your Friends To Get Engaged


If all your friends are getting married, does that mean you should be too?

It's here, folks: Engagement Season. The oh so lovely and sometimes dreadful period where your Facebook newsfeed is chock full with diamond rings, relationship statuses and cheesy engagement photoshoots.

For those who are engaged and lost in the moment, it's a joyous time, but for the rest of us who now have to decide whether we can pull off wearing the same dress to every wedding—all 5 of them—without anyone noticing and questioning whether we, too, are ready for marriage, it can be a period of pressure and unneeded uncertainty.

Now, I say all of this with experience since at least five of my friends got engaged in the past few months. And as much as I'm overwhelmed with love and excitement for them, I can't help but feel conflicted. On one side, I'm saying, "Wait, hold up. You're way too young to get engaged." And on the other, I feel a bit behind. I mean, if my peers are getting engaged, does that mean I'm ready, too? These are the types of ponderings you're likely to have during this time, so to help keep your thoughts clear and away from thinking of flowers and table arrangements before you're truly ready, here's a handy survival guide.

  1. Don't Compare Your Relationship To Others: It's going to be almost too easy during this time to compare your relationship to those who are engaged. Suddenly, you may feel strapped for time, as though you need to get engaged and married, right now. It's going to be hard, but take a moment to breathe, calm down and think the situation through. Here are some questions to ask yourself; Can you see yourself spending the rest of your life with your partner? Have you been in the relationship for a long period of time? Have you lived together before? Are you just thinking of marriage because your friends are? Answer these questions honestly, and you may soon realize that your brief moment of panic was simply brought on from feeling behind. And no one wants to commit to a lifetime with someone just because everyone else is.
  2. Figure Out A Budget And Which Weddings You Can Truly Attend: Wedding season means bringing out the big bucks to afford several dresses, comfortable heels, wedding presents, transportation and hotel costs, bridal shower gifts—and the list goes on. Remember this: just because you're invited to a wedding does not mean that you have to attend. Make a list of the upcoming nuptials and then decide which ones are most important. From there, create a suitable budget that will allow you to attend each and still pinch some pennies. Also, look into dress rental companies or swapping dresses with your best friends. Pitch in on gas for car pooling and try to get a reservation with another couple to save on hotel fare.
  3. Learn To Be Content With Where You Stand Now, But Look Toward The Future: Instead of dropping hints to your boyfriend like signing his email up to Tiffany's mailing list, use your friends' engagements as a way to help you plan for the future. Take notes of their wedding process; write down what you liked, didn't like, such as the catering company or their choice of wedding band. By doing this, you'll help get some of the planning out of the way and it will also give you time to sit on the idea of whether marriage is truly the right next step for you.