I Tried To Get Strangers To Cuddle With Me ... And Failed

cuddle buddy

What's a girl gotta do for a quick and innocent snuggle around here?

With fall officially in full swing, and the long winter cuddle season fast approaching, a new app, Cuddlr, aims to bring strangers together for a completely PG-rated cuddle session. And if I was raised by the Duggars and lived in a place where the "side-hugs only" rule is strictly followed, this would be a great app to use to find my future husband

But I live in New York City, a place where ain't nobody got time for a quick innocent cuddle, and nothing reminded me of that faster than using the Cuddlr app to find a potential cuddle-buddy.

The way it works: Cuddlr connects to your Facebook account, and uses your profile picture as your only photo, which appears in a bubble that other prospective cuddlers can click on and invite you to cuddle. Cuddle invitations need to be accepted within 15 minutes of receiving them. Then, you each get to send one 140-character message to each other. After that, a map appears that shows exactly where you are, and where your cuddle buddy is, which updates in real time the closer the two of you get to each other (yes, it is exactly as creepy as you are imagining). If you successfully find someone to cuddle with, you can upvote or downvote the person you cuddled with, based on how good of a cuddle they provided you.

The rules: Cuddlr's founders seem to know that they created something that had the potential to turn sketchy pretty quick so they outlined some hard, fast ground rules for users to follow. The rules of the road indicate that, unlike other apps, Cuddlr is strictly a PG-rated experience, and insist that users "keep the cuddle a cuddle." They also want you to politely wait until the end of the cuddle before you start a conversation with your cuddle-mate because the only thing more awkward than cuddling with a stranger is cuddling with a stranger and trying to make small talk.

The cuddling attempts: I made the mistake of approaching Cuddlr like any other dating app — waiting for someone to contact me. Maybe it's because of my lack of upvotes, or because my main photo is of me hugging my cat — but after a few days of no cuddle requests whatsoever, I started to get brazen and send them out myself. I accepted the first response I got — which was met with a message that read, "we can cuddle after if that's ok ;-)."

Not one to disregard the strict rules and conduct standards of Cuddlr, I canceled that cuddle (yes, you can do that) and tried to find someone more PG. A few days later, I accepted another cuddle request from a user who was 17 minutes away — which I thought would maybe mean a few subway stops. When I looked at our map, I discovered that the distance estimate had to have meant driving, because I was no where near being 17 minutes away from Bushwick by train or foot.

My last and final cuddle attempt also betrayed me by way of time and distance estimate, being 6 minutes away from where I was in Astoria ... over in the East Village. He did use his 140-character message to pay my cat a compliment, however, which was much appreciated.

The verdict: If you're in desperate need of a cuddle, you might want to invest in a body pillow this winter.