facebook

A Valentine's Formula That Works

Expert
Love

5 Steps to a perfect Valentine's Day celebration that will meet your sweetheart's expectations

A Valentine’s Formula That Works

5 Steps to a Perfect Valentine’s Day Celebration That will Meet your Sweetheart’s Expectations

Valentine’s Day is just around the corner, and many of you in a near desperation are searching for that perfect recipe that will make your sweetheart happy, joyful, and satisfied, not like it was the last year or the year before! You probably have an example or two of Valentine’s celebration going wrong that brought some bitter feelings, tears, an argument, or even a breakup!

You probably heard some scary reports that February is the busiest day for the divorces filed, affairs starting, and I certainly have seen an increase in people seeking my help for the relationship problems immediately after the Valentine’s Day.

The reason for all these troubling events is the one thing that so frequently is responsible for all the problems, stresses, and disappointments in every relationship—unmet expectations. She expects something unique and special, like an outing at that salsa club that she’s hinted she’d love to go to, and receives the same old box of candies or a stuffed bear.

He is hoping that this time she’ll give him something he can really use, like tickets to a hockey game, but alas! Here we go again with that aftershave that he doesn’t need but is afraid to throw away for the reason of her stern questioning to follow.

You already guessed what follows. In the best-case scenario, your partner will swallow the pain and pretend nothing happened, but the unmet expectations will start to form a resentment that will turn into a real problem later if nothing changes.

In the worst case, a nice big fight, tears, screams, and shut bedroom doors are awaiting you, possibly followed by some actions described above: looking around for somebody new who understands their needs better or even filing for divorce.

You can avoid all these misfortunes if you follow these 5 steps to a perfect, failure-proof Valentine’s Day celebration this year.

First, warm up your honey with little tokens of affection during this week preceding Valentine’s Day. Give her a single red rose as a symbol of your love, take her out for a coffee to a new place that you have just discovered, or share a new video of her favorite singer you found on YouTube.

Give him an unexpected neck or foot massage, ask to come into his room for just a second when he is busy on his computer and simply hug him from the back saying how much he means to you, or cook him an unexpected little treat that you know he likes so much.

Second, plan and execute that special, unique event on Valentine’s Day that will appeal to your sweetheart whether it is the nightclub she is always talking about, or a quiet romantic Italian restaurant with a view that she mentioned once or twice in the last couple of months. If she loves outdoors, you can plan a picnic in that scenic area overlooking the city lights that one of your friends mentioned when he described to you what a great impression it made on his girlfriend. Just pack a nice basket with some deli items, fruits, chocolates, and a bottle of her favorite wine or champagne.

If you take turns in planning Valentine’s and this is your year, ladies, you can take him to the beach or another scenic locale to watch a spectacular sunset and have a drink of his favorite brandy or tequila. If he’d rather stay at home and enjoy a nice dinner cooked by you, make sure you cook something he likes, even if it is that steak that you’d prefer he never touches. Remember, you are trying to satisfy his taste, not yours!

Third, give your loved one a special card with the words that you have written just for them, not a premade Hallmark with just your signature added. Sure, we all love Hallmark or Papyrus, and you can choose one, but make sure you have written something inside that comes from your heart, and not just “I love you.” Point out some unique qualities in your partner that you love, like their witty sense of humor, or their incredible beautiful eyes. It is even better if you create a note or a card yourself, whether you use your computer or an old style handwriting. They will appreciate it for sure!

Fourth, give your sweetie an enticing gift that they deserve, and not that last moment picked up in a store on a way from work box of chocolates or an Oh! so predictable bouquet of flowers. Yes, you can go to your favorite jeweler for a new token of your love shaped as diamond-accented earrings. However, it does not need to be something very expensive. A bottle of a new but inexpensive perfume with a note: “Imagining you wearing it tonight makes my heart beat faster,” or a yoga outfit in a new trendy color if she is into it, will touch her heart and make her appreciate you so much more!

Ladies, think twice about what your man would really prefer—a new tie or a subscription to his favorite sports magazine? If you answer it right, you will be rewarded!

Fifth, make sure the day ends in emotional, unifying, and hot sex! Leave enough time for it! Often times, one or both sides expect that to happen but overbook their day with so many activities that by the time they reach their bedroom, they are exhausted and it is too late. Even if they attempt intimacy, it either does not work or is of such poor quality that leaves nothing but a bad memory.

Remember, Valentine’s Day is all about celebrating your love, so make your sweetheart feel loved, and that feeling will be returned!