What is real love in a relationship?


I am becoming well versed in what it takes to know what love is!

Love is not infatuation or sex or the need to only stop being alone! First, I had to feel the hurt of being used and shut out! Second, I had to rediscover who I am and what I have to offer myself as a person! Third, I had to learn that everyone doesn't think like I do about love and the meaning of unconditional love. For myself and to others! People judge on looks first, then they judge you on your status in life. Your income and commitment! I have had many conversations with women and many of them tell me that women know what they want! Do women really KNOW what they want? I think people think they know but in reality none of us really have a clue! We can only go by what we have experienced in life to this point! Love should not make you a slave to it! Love should be with understanding and passion and compassion! I have many friends that learned the hard way and I am one of them! I have a saying that, two people should be able to see the world through both sets of eyes! It's all about taking the time to find understanding and leaving jelousy and anger out of the picture! It only harms in the long run! Turning away without reason only drives a stake in the hearts of people!

My take on dating is communication first, then meeting without sex first! If that works, then it's a second date! Sure, you should feel enough of something to date someone and I think it should have a chance to grow a bit! 

My first very hard lesson was when I was young and I was seduced into my first sexual encounter!  I was nieve and couldn't get enough! Also, I wasn't thinking about birth control nor was my seducer! She had been around the block a few times! Then I got the, "I'm pregnent", call! What did I do, I tried to do the right thing by getting married to her! Even after all my friends fathers tried to tell me not too! I felt compelled and did it anyway! Only to discover very soon that I was used by someone! I now have a son that I can relate to on this and he understands how his mother is! She is not invited to his house or is in my life at all! I have learned the signs of ,Takers, and steer clear of them!

If what I think may happen for me with my work as a creative person! And my success with those projects do come true, I'm sure I will find myself sorting through the givers and takers! I will cherish the women that care for me for who I am and stay away from the Barbie Dolls that are only out to dig for gold!