11 Little Things That Reveal Someone's Living Paycheck To Paycheck But Doesn't Want You To Know
Shame around financial hardship is hard to unlearn.
exebiche | Shutterstock Even though more than 60% of Americans report living paycheck to paycheck regularly, there's still a lot of guilt, shame, and embarrassment that people experiencing this kind of poverty or financial insecurity face. Whether it's societal or self-inflicted, they harbor a lot of discomfort about their financial state, even if it's something as simple as having a conversation about it with someone they trust. In some cases, they may never tell anyone, instead relying on credit, status symbols, or misguided conversations to make their financial situation seem better than it really is.
However, there are little things that reveal someone's living paycheck to paycheck but doesn't want you to know. Of course, these aren't intended to be "gotcha" moments, but rather, signs that give people the tools and knowledge they need to give grace and support others when they need it most. Money and financial struggles are both inherently personal and emotional things, but talking openly about them and asking for help can lighten the burdens they spark.
Here are 11 little things that reveal someone's living paycheck to paycheck but doesn't want you to know
1. They pay all their debts on the same day
PR Image Factory | Shutterstock
Whether it's paying back Venmo requests from friends or giving back borrowed money, people living paycheck to paycheck are forced to wait until payday to pay their debts. It's one of the little things that reveal someone's living paycheck to paycheck but doesn't want you to know, because they'll never pay things as they come up, but in a lump sum when they get paid.
While income, general wealth, and someone's career might provide a glimpse into their financial situation, a study from Bank of America found that there are more people living paycheck to paycheck that are making more than $100K annually than you might believe. So, even if someone is bringing in a lot of money and making big purchases, it doesn't necessarily mean they're financially comfortable or free.
2. They never agree to last-minute plans
Prostock-studio | Shutterstock
According to a PYMNTS study, two-thirds of people argue that they need their next paycheck to be able to pay all of their bills, so saying "yes" to last-minute plans and unexpected expenses is largely out of the question for these households. Of course, with the right budgeting and frugal habits, some people are able to swing these experiences financially, but for the most part, it's one of the little things that reveal someone's living paycheck to paycheck.
It's part of the reason why many people struggle silently with loneliness when they're living a financially unstable life. They may not want other people to know they're living paycheck to paycheck, but they're also isolating themselves from being able to have conversations about it when they can't connect with friends in social spaces that have a financial barrier to entry.
3. They subtly check their bank account
fizkes | Shutterstock
According to a SoFi study, 38% of people check their bank accounts daily, usually to ensure they have enough money to make a purchase, not necessarily to monitor spending and patterns.
Before spending money — whether it's getting groceries, grabbing a coffee with friends, or paying a bill — a person who's living paycheck to paycheck is almost always going to check their bank account. It's one of the habits that's most commonly shared amongst people struggling financially, while their comfortable counterparts spend without reservation.
4. They always say 'I'm not that hungry'
SynthEx | Shutterstock
To keep up with social interactions and relationships in their lives, people struggling financially may still say "yes" to going out, but often refuse to spend money, buy a meal at restaurants, or overspend when everyone else is indulging.
They may use phrases like "I'm not that hungry" or "I ate before I came" to justify their lack of spending when they go out, but it's really one of the little things that reveal they're living paycheck to paycheck and may not have the actual money to spend.
5. They never fill up their gas tank
Estrada Anton | Shutterstock
According to a survey from Monmouth University, 58% of Americans argue that it's a struggle for them to regularly pay for gas. On top of rising costs, debt payment, and financial insecurity, they're cutting corners and making sacrifices just to be able to afford these basic necessities.
That's why penny pinching — like filling their tank up with only a set amount of money, rather than to completion — is one of the little things that reveal someone's living paycheck to paycheck but doesn't want you to know. They have to plan out everything, especially toward the end of their pay period, to ensure they have the money to afford everything coming up.
6. They put things back at the checkout counter
Drazen Zigic | Shutterstock
Whether they're buying clothes or groceries for the week, one of the little things that reveal someone's living paycheck to paycheck is their tendency to put things back at the register. Whether they're following a strict budget or literally only have a certain amount of money in their bank account, someone who's living paycheck to paycheck will often have to go through the discomfort of making sacrifices to keep their expenses low.
In many cases, it's impossible to avoid habits like this that spark embarrassment or insecurity in the moment, and like a study from Organizational Behavior and Human Decision Processes suggests, they can spark deep-rooted shame that further intensifies financial hardship.
7. They don't use auto pay
fizkes | Shutterstock
According to a PYMNTS study, nearly 60% of people avoid using auto pay systems for their monthly bills because they don't have enough money to afford everything. In some cases, that means wracking up late fees, paying certain bills late, and using the money they do have in strategic ways to pay bills with the highest interest or the latest due date.
This avoidance of auto pay is one of the little things that reveal someone's living paycheck to paycheck but doesn't want you to know. They may seem fine on the surface, going out to eat with friends or buying birthday presents for loved ones, but at home, they're desperately troubleshooting how they're going to afford rent or their student loan payments.
8. They say 'no' to plans that involve driving
Krakenimages.com | Shutterstock
A 2024 study on car ownership suggests that many people are stuck in a financially unstable situation because of the costs of transportation. From managing unexpected car repairs, to spending on gas, and investing in other maintenance services like oil changes, having and using a car regularly adds up to a huge expense.
That's why saying "no" to plans that involve driving is one of the little things that reveal someone's living paycheck to paycheck but doesn't want you to know. They may not explain why they prefer to carpool or stay home, but it's often because they can't afford gas or are being strategic about avoiding their car as much as possible to save money.
9. They Venmo in exact amounts
DimaBerlin | Shutterstock
Many people who are living paycheck to paycheck are forced into penny pinching habits and a kind of scrutiny and strictness around spending that they'd otherwise steer clear from with financial stability.
From being strict with going out to requesting Venmos rounded to the nearest dollar, they find small and subtle ways to save money that aren't always healthy for relationships and social connections. Even those few pennies — saved from rounding down on a Venmo or rounding up when requesting others — seem to make a difference in their ability to spend without so much anxiety toward the end of the pay period.
10. They avoid conversations about money
MAYA LAB | Shutterstock
Avoiding conversations about money is one of the little things that reveal someone's living paycheck to paycheck or struggling financially in their everyday life. Even if they're working toward a better situation, the societal and self-inflicted shame that many people experiencing poverty face is hard to unlearn.
They may be visibly uncomfortable when other people are talking about money, avoidant in situations that require spending, or even embarrassed when it comes to planning things like a group vacation that requires a light to be shone on their budget.
11. They're more anxious around the 1st of the month
fizkes | Shutterstock
According to a 2012 study, there are a number of financial practices, like paying bills or even talking about money, that are intertwined with feelings of anxiety, fear, and embarrassment in everyday life. Financial struggle may seem like a "black and white" situation that's mendable with certain behaviors, but at its core it's an inherently personal and emotional experience.
That's why you may notice someone who's living paycheck to paycheck may be more anxious or socially withdrawn around the first of the month. It's the time when the bills start to add up, their paycheck dwindles a lot faster, and the reality of their financial situation becomes ultra-clear and impossible to ignore.
Zayda Slabbekoorn is a staff writer with a bachelor’s degree in social relations & policy and gender studies who focuses on psychology, relationships, self-help, and human interest stories.
