The 3 Personality Traits Men Find Most Attractive In A Potential Wife

Photo: Unsplash: Stephanie Liverani
3 Personality Traits Of Women Who Inspire Men To Fall In Love & Get Married

This is the kind of woman he sees as 'marriage material'.

When you start considering marriage and how to find a potential husband, you might also begin wondering what a man looks for in a potential wife.

When they're still simply dating, men will generally date any women they're attracted to, without much particular emphasis on specific personality traits. However, the way men think about what they want changes dramatically once they feel ready to fall in love and get married.


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A good man knows your personality and character are foundational to his ability to build a long-term relationship with you. A smart man, the kind of man you’re attracted to, won't be as shallow as some might think when it comes to making a decision about who he wants to marry.

With that in mind, here are three personality traits men find most attractive in a potential wife when they're ready to fall in love and get married.

1. Integrity

More specifically, men look for women who say "yes" and "no" with integrity.

When a man first meets you, he’s attracted to the flexibility of your “yes.”

For example, when he attempts to make plans with you and you say “yes,” you remain open to his ideas and suggestions about what to do. This allows him to see that you’re confident enough in yourself and in him to be flexible within the context of your “yes.”

This is counterbalanced by the integrity of your “no.” Your “no” forms the backbone of your integrity with a man. It lets him know that he will have to earn the right to be with you.

You instinctively let him know when something he suggests doesn’t feel good. Standing by your “no” shows him that you are in tune with what you both are and are not comfortable with.

The flexibility of your “yes” lets him know that you are confident and willing to explore his leadership, while the integrity of your “no” lets him know that you will walk away from any situation that doesn’t align with your values.


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2. Joyful

More specifically, men look for women who laugh easily and with sheer joy.

Laughter is an integral part of a great relationship. We live too long to be with someone who doesn’t have a sense of humor. Life is hard enough. A man can date a woman he’s only attracted to, but he marries a woman he can laugh with.

Laughter is a great barometer as to whether you have an authentic connection with a man. It means you’re comfortable being yourself, and we all want this in a relationship.

The adage "happy wife, happy life" means that when a man finds it’s easy to laugh with you, he knows that you will be able to get through the hard times with him, which explains why men are generally so attracted to happy women.


3. Virtuous commitment to love

More specifically, men look for women who have the ability to commit to love through virtue.

Men are often accused of being less than willing to commit. However, when a man is looking for a potential wife, he may suddenly find that few women are truly committed to finding love when the opportunity presents itself.

In this context, virtue means that you hold both yourself and him to a higher standard, and that you are committed to experiencing courtship as a road to love.

Courtship is a test of time. I’m won't fully address it here, but I will say that men typically want a wife who can shift him away from his current fixation on his own needs toward a wider perspective on what makes for well-being and satisfaction in love and in life. They are able to make that shift only when they feel confident in your commitment to love.

Overall, the firmness and flexibility of your “no” and your “yes” are the foundation of a man's ability to trust you.

Your joy, laughter, and humor demonstrate your authenticity, as well as the reality of your connection together. They give a man confidence that he will be able get through the tough times with you as you build a life together.

Your commitment to love means everything to a man. It means that his highest sense of purpose can be found in a relationship with you. It means that your standards will take him to another level of what it means to be a man.

Men marry women of virtue. They marry women who make them better men.


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James Allen Hanrahan is a highly sought after relationship coach for STRONG women based in Los Angeles. Get his FREE Chemistry to Commitment formula for lasting love. If you're a smart woman struggling to achieve relationship success, check out the treasure trove of men's secrets to fall in love in A Life of Love.

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