11 Things Gen Z Gets Wrong About Life And How They Can Recover
They're largely still learning how to navigate adulthood.
MDV Edwards | Shutterstock Gen Z is a widely unique generation, with values and priorities in life that often stray widely away from the traditional ones of their parents and grandparents. According to a Stanford Report, they're self-driven, collaborative, and diverse-minded, interested in paving a new path forward for younger generations in society, the workplace, and other formal institutions.
While they're incredibly passionate about change and crafting new expectations for their generation, there are certainly many things Gen Z gets wrong about life — but they can still recover. From financial misunderstandings to phone usage and even preferences for instant gratification, Gen Z faces several struggles, but they're not concrete. There's always room to learn, grow, and evolve.
Here are 11 things Gen Z gets wrong about life and how they can recover
1. Confusing passivity for work-life balance
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According to a Deloitte study on Gen Z, this generation, alongside their millennial counterparts, is constructing new ideas about modern work-life balance expectations in their jobs. From having enough paid time off to enjoy their personal lives to feeling free to leave their work at the office, many of these expectations for boundaries with work differ intensely from those of their boomer and Gen X predecessors.
While true work-life balance has many benefits for workers of any age, from reducing stress to promoting better job satisfaction, overemphasizing it to the point of being passive in a job or unenthused with work can lead to more problems in the workplace than peace.
However, it's possible for Gen Z workers to still thrive in the workplace while also protecting their personal time and freedom. By nailing down the values that matter most in their lives and being intentional about communicating their needs to their employers, they can still set boundaries in the workplace without compromising their opportunities for growth, success, and passion.
2. Thinking self-diagnosis is self-awareness
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While social media and internet accessibility have made talking about mental health and finding community much easier for many younger generations, they can also contribute to a lot of misinformation and misdiagnoses without true professional insights or support.
Scrolling on the internet, seeing other people talk about their symptoms, and self-diagnosing is not the same thing as being self-aware; in fact, it may sabotage a person's perception and support of their own mental health.
However, with the right boundaries and communities in-person, Gen Zers can leverage social media for support, knowledge, and community without any of the added stress or pressure. When it comes to diagnoses, check with a professional. But if finding community and gaining awareness about an internal issue comes from social media, what's the harm in that?
3. Thinking 'deservingness' means you should get something
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Believing that "deservingness" equates to justification for things like overspending, crossing boundaries, or hurting others is one of the things Gen Z gets wrong about life. Some Gen Zers have an obsession with accountability in this way.
They believe that everyone needs to protect their comfort and that their deservingness for an apology or justification means they can call out people without restrictions or perspective. Even when they're buying a "little treat" or shopping online, they use "I deserve it" as an excuse to justify their overspending, even at the expense of their long-term financial comfort and stability.
However, this sense of deservingness doesn't need to be an inherently bad thing; it can fuel a healthy sense of self-awareness, a solid value system, solid relationships, and strong boundaries. But it takes practice to set boundaries and hold yourself accountable first, which is what many Gen Zers still have left to do.
4. Romanticizing 'main character energy' without work
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Self-love and true inner confidence add value to our lives, promote a healthier mindset, and even bolster our relationships to a healthier place, according to neuroscientist Nicole A. Tetreault. However, adopting "main character energy" without any of the inner work only breeds entitled and out-of-touch people.
Gen Zers often have a strong internal drive to lead activist causes and make change, but when it comes at the expense of their humility and empathetic nature, it can lead to resentment and generational disconnection.
5. Thinking boundaries control other people's behaviors
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Communication between two people and a shared sense of understanding is the key to healthy boundaries, yet many people still misguidedly use them to police other people's behavior. However, true boundaries are a reflection of the kinds of behavior you'll tolerate from others, not necessarily a means to control someone else's actions and responses.
That's one of the things some Gen Zers get wrong about life — they place unrealistic expectations on other people to do what they want and act in a way that's most comfortable for them, naming "boundaries" as justification.
Of course, boundaries can help to protect Gen Zers from toxic relationships and draining interactions, but it takes self-discipline to maintain them. It's about walking away, creating space, and finding ways to internally regulate themselves, rather than trying to control what someone else thinks and how they behave.
6. Confusing validation with visibility
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While it's true that social media has crafted a culture where many Gen Zers who are still searching and crafting their identities are resorting to trends and attention-seeking behavior for a sense of belonging, they also face tons of misconceptions about community.
Just because you go viral, get a million views on a video, or even grow a platform of followers, it doesn't mean that you're being validated or truly supported — you're simply more visible to more people. That's why it's so important for young people to learn how to validate themselves, according to psychotherapist Sharon Martin, because relying on social media for external attention and validation only leaves a bigger, more prominent void in their lives.
Setting healthy boundaries with social media and crafting a personal identity revolving around truly validating hobbies, relationships, and habits is key. It's okay to make content online, grow a big following, and even find belonging and a community of like-minded people online. However, when it becomes a one-way street of seeking external validation from these people, it's not only draining but harshly toxic.
7. Using astrology as an excuse
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According to an EduBirdie study, over 80% of Gen Z and millennials believe in cosmic guidance and name astrology — from daily horoscopes to astrological signs — as a large part of their lives. While this sense of belonging and guidance can be comforting and validating in everyday life, using these tools as an excuse for misbehavior and toxic actions can be harmful.
For example, a Gen Z person blaming their impulsivity on "being an Aries" only perpetuates a cycle of self-justification for bad habits that put their well-being — and other people in their lives' well-being — at risk.
So, if you're interested in astrology and find meaning in astrological tools or resources, be sure to hold yourself accountable. Take some of these less favorable traits, like bluntness or impulsivity, and craft healthy habits and routines around them, rather than using them as a constant excuse to evade accountability.
8. Believing productivity equates to self-worth
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Even though many Gen Zers are actively challenging the "hustle culture" of their boomer and Gen X family members' routines, there are still many misguided beliefs about productivity that plague their generation. From turning hobbies into side hustles and struggling with guilt over carving out alone time or saying "no" to social plans, these are some of the things Gen Z gets wrong about life.
They believe that their ability to be productive — from thriving in the workplace, to having a full social calendar, and achieving things to share on social media — equates to their self-worth. When they're prioritizing rest and alone time, they feel inadequate. But when they do achieve things and overschedule themselves without a sense of self-gratification, it only leads to worsened feelings of self-esteem.
Of course, they can recover with a quick mindset shift — starting with perceptions of social media. You're only ever seeing what people want you to see on social media. The alone time, productivity struggles, and mistakes of your peers aren't coming on your feed, but of course, you're not alone in experiencing them.
9. Treating red flags like personality 'quirks'
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Treating their own red flags like personality "quirks" — whether it's a tendency to overspend or "ghost" people after a first date — is one of the things Gen Z gets wrong about life. Considering social support and healthy relationships are some of the sole indicators of a Gen Zer's well-being and happiness, according to a study from BMC Public Health, it's ironic that they're so harsh on other people.
Whether it's calling out someone's "ick" or cutting off a relationship in the face of a single "yellow flag," they're overly graceful with protecting themselves from personal growth, while holding others to impossible standards. To truly recover from this misguided belief, it all starts with them taking accountability — working toward changing their personal habits, being more mindful and self-aware, and, of course, giving other people grace.
10. Believing confidence comes solely from looks
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According to a 2017 study, self-confidence is often built through practice, by several things, from acceptance to talking to others, protecting mental health, and prioritizing self-love. The more you accept your authenticity and lean into the discomfort of showing it to the world, the more comfortable and confident you become.
While looks, feeling comfortable in your body, and having the resources to self-express all play a role in confidence, it's truly a person's mindset and self-care that makes the biggest difference, in the majority of cases. That's why believing confidence comes solely from looks or appearance is one of the things Gen Z gets wrong about life.
That's why comparison culture online is so toxic, especially for young people still crafting their unique sense of authenticity and their own identity. They feel pressured to follow trends and compare themselves to others, at the expense of their own confidence and well-being.
11. Equating cynicism to intelligence
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From picking apart political discussions to viewing every cup as "half-empty," many Gen Zers get caught up in a spiral of cynicism that negatively affects their lives. And who can blame them? However, the belief that competency and intelligence equate to a certain level of cynicism is misguided, according to a study from Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin.
Yes, intelligent people may be more wary of accepting things at face value and more critical about conversations that overlook deeper thoughts, but lacking hope about the future, relationships, or personal well-being doesn't make someone more competent — it makes them miserable.
Zayda Slabbekoorn is a senior editorial strategist with a bachelor's degree in social relations & policy and gender studies who focuses on psychology, relationships, self-help, and human interest stories.
