If A Woman Uses These 11 Phrases, She's A Deeply Judgmental Person

Her judgments can deeply affect a person's self-esteem.

Written on Sep 07, 2025

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In life, everyone should strive to be open-minded and welcoming to those around them, accepting people for who they are. Even if they don't always understand them, at the very least, people should do their best to hear them out. Whether it's immediately forming an opinion on someone or something, or using a first impression as a basis for criticism, if a woman uses these phrases, she's a deeply judgmental person.

It's not like women go out of their way to judge others; in fact, most of the time, they believe they're a "girls' girl" and make it a point to be open. And while someone can tell a lot based on someone's actions, it's their words that also hold meaning. Because even if a woman doesn't realize it, she could be harming another person's self-esteem and the way they see themselves in the world.

If a woman uses these 11 phrases, she's a deeply judgmental person

1. 'I'm just being honest'

woman saying i'm just being honest shrugging Ekateryna Zubal | Shutterstock

Honesty is great, but many people use honesty to tear other people down. With the fakest smile, they say the most hurtful things and then follow it up with "I'm just being honest." And while being honest is important, there's a way to do so while also considering the other person's feelings.

As psychotherapist Ilene Strauss Cohen explained, "When we communicate authentically, kindly, constructively, and consistently about what we believe in, we can create richer and more meaningful relationships." So, if a woman ever says anything like this, she might not think much of it, but anyone who's comfortable tearing someone down under the guise of honesty isn't someone you want around.

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2. 'That's never going to work'

judgmental woman saying that's never going to work to man Mladen Mitrinovic | Shutterstock

It's important to be realistic about goals. As much as someone might want to marry their celebrity crush or become the next influencer, it's good to have a back-up plan. For women, while she might think she's being helpful, she's really being a hater when she tells someone their goals will never work.

Someone who truly admires and loves you will always find a way to be encouraging. Even if your dreams are unrealistic, they'll be supportive while also giving a bit of tough love. For instance, saying, "I believe that you can do anything you put your mind to, but just be sure to have a back-up plan just in case" isn't problematic.

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3. 'You're overreacting'

angry woman telling friend shes overreacting Ekateryna Zubal | Shutterstock

If a woman uses the phrase "You're overreacting," she's a deeply judgmental person because even if she's being honest, nobody wants to be told their emotions are wrong. Regardless of what a woman thinks, when a person is going through grief or is frustrated, telling someone they're being dramatic is extremely critical.

Even if the other person's feelings are valid, it doesn't matter. Toxic people will always be right, while the other person is always wrong. However, this isn't all that shocking. As counselor Stephanie A. Sarkis explained, "Some common behaviors of toxic people include constant criticism, gaslighting, passive-aggressive behavior, and a need for power and control."

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4. 'If you like it, I love it'

woman telling co-worker if you like it i love it Miljan Zivkovic | Shutterstock

Everyone's heard this phrase at least once in their lifetime. Whether it was their mom side-eyeing them while shopping or their friend wincing over their choices, if a woman uses the phrase "If you like it, I love it," she's judgmental and critical.

If someone doesn't like what their other friend picked out, it's okay to voice their opinion. But simply uttering this phrase isn't just annoying, it's unfounded and rude, and shows that they don't value what the other person is saying. To avoid being known as a judgmental person, it's important to just say what's on your mind, without being critical.

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5. 'That's a choice'

judgmental woman being rude about friend's purchase VGstockstudio | Shutterstock

If a woman uses this phrase, she's a deeply judgmental person who's trying to skate around the truth, bringing more frustration than help. Whether they meant for it to happen or not, being unclear leads to misunderstandings, which, according to the research from the Handbook of the Economics of Conflict, lead to conflict.

A woman who says this isn't doing it out of the kindness of her heart. Unlike people-pleasers, judgmental people utter these snarky remarks for one reason only: they want to feel superior to those around them. So, don't be afraid to call them out. Knocking them down an inch is the only way to stop a person like this in their tracks.

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6. 'I would never do that, but you do you, I guess'

judgmental woman hugging friend looking suspicious Nicoleta lonescu | Shutterstock

There's nothing more infuriating than meeting someone who thinks they're better than others. Filled with delusion, these individuals act like another person's mistakes make them inferior. But everyone makes mistakes; nobody is immune to messing up.

The best part about messing up is knowing that they aren't alone. Friends and family members alike have also made silly mistakes and have come out of the other side. However, a judgmental person doesn't see things that way.

Due to their superiority complex, they assume that a friend making bad decisions somehow exempts them from also making the same decisions. And while they may or may not be right, this doesn't change the fact that nobody is perfect, not even them.

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7. 'No offense, but...'

woman saying no offense but to man Anatoliy Karlyuk | Shutterstock

A woman might think she's being helpful by giving you the cold, hard truth, yet by using this phrase, she's being deeply judgmental. Maybe she's trying to be kind, but even if the truth is harsh, if someone is going to tell it how it is, they might as well say it without using filler or sugarcoating it.

As psychotherapist Amy Morin said, "While being polite is generally seen as a positive trait, excessive politeness can muddy the waters of communication, leading to misunderstandings and leaving important issues unresolved."

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8. 'I told you so'

judgmental woman telling friends i told you so Antonio Guillem | Shutterstock

If a woman uses the phrase "I told you so," she's a deeply judgmental person. Because while it feels good to be right about something, gloating about being right is just plain rude. Most people refrain from saying this, as they don't want to make the situation worse. Even if they're clearly right, their main concern is about their loved one or fixing the issue.

No matter how tempting it may be, most people have enough sense to know that this isn't the time or place for snarky remarks. Unfortunately, judgmental women are too consumed by their need to be right. As a result, they're more than willing to rub it in someone's face, even if the outcome is having one less friend.

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9. 'I'm surprised you didn't know that'

rude woman looking confused saying i'm surprised you didn't know that to friend Aloha Hawaii | Shutterstock

Judgmental women tend to belittle others. Whether it's their looks or their intelligence, the only way for them to feel good is to make themselves look more intelligent. And as a 2024 study found, downwards comparison leads to greater self-esteem.

It should go without saying, but not everyone is going to know everything. Even if someone considers it common sense, some people are just taught the basics. This is why people should be given grace. Despite it seeming like common knowledge, not everyone has the privilege or time to educate themselves about everything.

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10. 'It can't be that hard'

woman saying it can't be that hard to man as they argue Antonio Guillem | Shutterstock

If a woman uses the phrase "It can't be that hard," she's a deeply judgmental person. What's considered easy for one person might feel impossible for another, and just because someone finds something difficult, it doesn't make them any less intelligent.

Despite how judgmental people may be, everyone has their strengths and weaknesses. While one person might be great at math, someone else might struggle to understand simple algebra. Yet this doesn't make a woman better than anyone else; it simply means she's good at one thing out of all the skills and talents in the world.

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11. 'That's so typical of you'

woman thinking that's so typical of you on date fizkes | Shutterstock

Nobody wants to feel judged, especially by a friend or loved one. But someone telling you that an action or behavior of yours is "typical" doesn't feel good. Every single person is multidimensional and doesn't always fit into the same box.

When a judgmental woman utters this phrase, she's essentially saying, "You're so predictable and easy to read." And while this might not sound like a huge deal, this can easily make someone feel insignificant. According to a 2021 study, when people feel insignificant, they suffer, often leading to anxiety, depression, and disconnection.

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Marielisa Reyes is a writer with a bachelor's degree in psychology who covers self-help, relationships, career, family, and astrology topics.

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