It's How You Fight Not Love That Attain A Lasting Relationship!


Unconditional Love? 18 Conditions to note to help you through the relationship obstacles.

Everyone talks about "unconditional love"  but is there such a thing?  (Other than from our Mothers.)  We all want to believe that somebody will love us completely, forever, no matter what. But is that possible and how do we overcome the obstacles and disagreements? I don't know all the answers; I can only speak from experience, but here is what I have learned over my 57 years.

  1. Any relationship is a two way street. You can not make one work by yourself, no matter how determined you are.
  2. If either person is focused on the negative they will find some; if they look for the positive they will find that and no positive will ever come from a negative.
  3. You can not sweep problems under the carpet or you'll end up with a big pile of garbage that will be astronomical to clean up.
  4. Sometimes you need to take a time out to calm down, but you eventually have to come back together to have that conversation.
  5. You can't go forward with old baggage hanging on. It must be dealt with on both sides.
  6. To overcome any issue, you must both come to the table willing to listen and empathize in order to work things through. This takes love and commitment.
  7. Communication has to be done face to face and with respect for both parties.
  8. You both have to come from a place of love and a logical, open mind, not just hurt emotions.
  9. You both have to be able to listen and empathize. Just because you don't understand the other party does not mean they are wrong.
  10. Every person is entitled to be treated with respect. This is a basic human need.
  11. A relationship will never survive when one person is always the one giving in; a happy wife does not equal a happy life, for long.
  12. A healthy relationship allows both parties to be equals and happy.
  13. A healthy relationship allows both parties the opportunity to share their concerns, needs and desires.
  14. No relationship or person can complete all our needs.
  15. Every person is human and makes mistakes and we must be able to forgive and forget in order to move on.
  16. Blackmail and emotional or physical abuse are never ok, ever.
  17. Sometimes you have to agree to disagree.
  18. If all else fails, fight naked, armed with pillows, it's hard to stay mad when naked and a pillow fight etc. is so much more fun. :-)

Unfortunately sometimes, when the relationship does you more harm than good, you need to know when to walk away.  In my mind true love means that you have been through the good bad and the wonderful and you still are committed to make the effort to work at it with love and respect. As for unconditional love, I think there are always conditions and any relationship without respect is doomed to destroy itself, so how could there be unconditional love?

If you have been given the great gift of love, you are so fortunate. Treasure it. Every person in the world deserves, needs and craves love and respect. Be kind to each other; we are all just humans trying to survive this journey we call life.