How To Talk To Your Kids About Masturbation (It's Necessary!)

having the talk

Parents often freeze at the sex talk. Teach your kids that masturbation and intimacy are gifts!!!

The Huffington Post reported that parents often freeze at the thought of having a sex talk with kids. Parents report upset stomach, shaking, and even getting the cold sweats when figuring out how to talk about masturbation with kids.  Chill out and take the high road with this easy breezy approach to an important topic!!!

What children learn when they are young will help guide their experiences with intimacy and sex for the rest of their lives. So parents want to approach topics like sex, intimacy, and masturbation with great care and respect.

Teach children that their sexuality is a gift. Explain to children that the human body is wonderfully made, and that humans can enjoy many healthy pleasures in life.

A strong family culture can teach children healthy positive messages about their bodies and their sexuality. Parents can joyfully adopt a family culture that recognizes the pleasures of sexual stimulation, including masturbation, as a natural birthright of all humans.

A healthy family culture also affirms to children that the genitals are private. A simple and effective phrase is "Private parts are private matters!" This message also leads into future important conversations about safety.

Parents can casually explain that pleasure and experience that involve genitals and breasts are not discussed or demonstrated in front of others ... until children are grown up and have found their beloved.

Parents can complete the talk by explaining that children are free to enjoy their bodies in private, in the bathroom or bedroom.

Children must also be encouraged to bring their questions or concerns to parents - where they will get trustworthy and appropriate information!

Parents can gently have this conversation with even young children! This sets the stage for a positive attitude toward sexuality. Children will also know they can come to parents with questions and concerns.

Parents who practice natural child rearing and attachment parenting will especially want to use this gentle and loving technique. Children being raised in a nurturing family culture will benefit greatly from this loving and respectful introduction to the wonder of their bodies.

Approaching a sensitive topic like masturbation with a casual and relaxed attitude will tell children that sex is not a taboo subject with parents. Plus, children will be ready for more serious conversations down the road about safety, abstinence, and knowing when is the right time for sex.


Darleen Claire is a Parenting Expert with a background in Clinical Mental Health Counseling, Exceptional Student Education, and Brain-Based Strategies to promote learning and development.