Men Reveal Why They Said ‘No’ To Sex (Even Though They Liked You)

Anticipation enhances consummation.

Man declining sex after woman thought he liked her Konstantin Postumitenko | Canva

Certain men rarely turn down sex. For the guys who always lead with the physical, there has to be a sudden shift of perception that happens inside their mind and triggers them to not have sex with you. It is like a hyper-masculine counter-intuition is tearing away his social mask.

So, if you're asking yourself "Why didn't he want to sleep with me?", keep in mind these three triggers that stop men in their tracks even though they like you. When these triggers go off, they may not be interested in being intimate with you.


Men reveal why they said ‘no’ to sex (even though they liked you):

1. He has a realization

The time comes when a man who plays a domineering social role receives a wake-up call and must face reality. This is when you help him suddenly realize, "I can't have sex with her. It's not fair to her. I would just be using her."

This usually happens when he's had a chance to be away from you for a few days. If he gets caught up in the moment, all bets are off. When he has time to think about it, he might develop more social awareness about his bad behavior. This is good to know and why you want to take your time to get to know a guy.


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2. He has another girl

These guys might have earned a well-deserved reputation as womanizers. However, if a man is truly smitten with another woman, he won't have sex with you no matter how much he likes you.

Men like this are one-focused. When another woman is in their heart, it is like they can't even hear you. If he likes you, he'll talk to you but you'll see he's distracted. When this guy is smitten with another, it takes over his entire body, and he can't be present with another woman he likes.


She doesn't know why he said no to sex Petrenko Andriy via Shutterstock

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3. You challenged him

The main reason men don't have sex with you even though they like you is you have challenged them. These guys have to think they've won you over, that it was hard to do, and they can gain some bragging rights.


The harder and longer it takes to win you over, the better. They can only handle little victories you disperse one at a time. He gets your phone number and shows his friends. You have the first date and his chest swells with you on his arm. You share a first kiss, and he becomes Prince Charming from the fairy tales he allegedly never watched. If they think they can have sex with you right away, many — though not all, of course — lose interest.

If he likes you, remember to hold back a little bit. Don't go all in. Keep your cards close to your chest so he doesn't know where he stands with you until he commits to you.

Anticipation enhances consummation. With that in mind, let him win you over long before sex is even an option. If he truly likes you, he'll wait for you to be ready.


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James Allen Hanrahan is a dating and relationship coach for women based in Los Angeles. He's also the author of "A Life of Love" and "Dating Advice for Alpha Women."