5 Ways To Make Her Feel Like The Most Beautiful Girl In The World

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body image
Love, Self

You hear it all the time: “Love your flaws! They’re part of you, and you should love who you are.”

Indeed, this is a true statement about positive body image, but women get tired of hearing it. Because even though it’s true, it doesn’t make you feel any better about yourself. And truth be told, if you could eliminate your flaws, you would.

But the real question is: Would that even make you feel better about yourself?

It’s interesting in today’s world how we celebrate individuality and the concept of inner beauty; yet, when it comes to a woman’s appearance and body image, what’s promoted by media, advertisements and societal standards is to look the same. You should all conform to a standard of having shiny hair, unblemished skin, bright white teeth, and a firm, slender body — as if that's the only definition of true beauty. 

If you don’t fit into these standards, you’re left feeling like you don’t measure up. You are flawed.

While it may be easy for you — as a lover, friend, son, or father — to see just how inaccurate and emotionally damaging these feelings are, you can help the women in your life overcome this negative thought pattern by reminding them of their true beauty and value.

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Here are 5 empowering phrases the women I've worked with find helpful for improving their body image — instead of focusing on their flaws — that you can put into action:

1. Remind her that "beauty" is only superficial.

For starters, if she does complain about her flaws, instead of telling her to love them, acknowledge and validate her complaints.

Tell her something like, "It totally makes sense that you feel that way. Especially when there is so much pressure to achieve "beauty perfection" in our world. However, the reality is we all have flaws to some degree and what we see in T.V. and magazine ads is fake, thanks to airbrushing and Photoshop."

Then tell her something positive about herself that has nothing to do with her appearance — and that you absolutely adore.

2. Tell her she’s beautiful.

Beautiful is a word used to describe many things, but mostly it’s used to describe our experience. We may use it to describe a movie, a book, a play or a venture into nature. There are things we describe as beautiful because of the impression they have on our hearts.

Beautiful is not the appearance itself, it describes our experience. When it comes to her appearance, the old cliché is true… beauty is only skin deep.

So if you tell her she’s beautiful, back it up by giving examples of what she’s done, how she impacted your life, or how she’s contributed to the betterment of others.

3. Praise her efforts.

Along with beauty perfection, we praise and admire achievement. But there has never been a measure of achievement without an equal proportion of effort. 

So acknowledge her job well done. Praise her for her hard work. Tell her how her efforts make your life better. Tell her how her efforts positively affect those she serves. Tell her she’s a valuable asset as an employee, a friend, a mother, a wife, etc.

And of course, tell her often why you love her.

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4. Encourage her.

Remind her that she’s strong, courageous, intelligent, resilient, and resourceful. She is deserving of all that is good in life — and whoever may have told her she is less than or not good enough is a liar.

Her flaws pale in comparison to who she is, what she does, how she touches the lives of others, and what her legacy will ultimately be.

Tell her you don’t see her as flawed — and then tell her why.

5. Compliment her.

Don’t just tell her she’s pretty or she looks amazing. Tell her how her appearance is a reflection of who she is on the inside.

For example, one source of a woman’s empowerment is often tied to weight loss, as if you can’t have one without the other. However, I believe when exercise is about self-care and not about achieving a certain number on the scale or to fit into a smaller size, the process becomes easier. The motivation to work out becomes a desire, rather than a "have to."

So if you like the way she looks and think she has an amazing body, tell her you admire her great care for herself. That's a meaningful compliment that focuses on the why, rather than the result.

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This is why I love to do what I do. We are so much more than our flaws, and when I can help women see beyond what they perceive as flaws, they become fearless. 

They do great things and create great things. They learn to make a difference… and make the world a better place.

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Craig Nielson serves as a Professional Coach, speaker, and educator helping women who feel insecure with self-doubt to becoming fully empowered with self-confidence. Learn more and get a free consultation and e-book at MyInternalImage.com.