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You need to establish trust.
By Christine Schoenwald — Written on Aug 26, 2019
No one is completely open and honest all the time. We all have things we’d rather keep private and hidden, and sometimes we never trust people enough to reveal our deep dark secrets.
It can be beyond difficult to have a relationship with someone who has walls up. You can try to break through them or even ignore them, but they’re always there. And if we consider the zodiac signs in astrology, some signs just won't ever let you through.
It’s frustrating when you want to be closer to someone, but they refuse to let you in. Everybody is different, and no one way of getting someone to open up is going to work with everybody.
No one wants to feel that they’re opening themselves up to getting hurt or betrayed. If they've been hurt in the past, it will take a lot to take the chance of getting hurt again.
ARIES (March 21 - April 19)
To break down Aries' walls, start talking to them about the things they're passionate about. Keep the conversation upbeat and positive. Really listen to what they have to say as someone who is a good listener. Don't interrupt them or feel the need to bring up your own examples.
While Aries do enjoy competition, they don't need it in their conversation, especially if you're trying to get them to open up. Over time, you can slowly bring up more personal issues because the more Aries trusts you, the more they'll open up.
TAURUS (April 20 - May 20)
First, know that you're going to have to be extremely patient; the process of breaking down Taurus' walls is going to take a very long time. They're not quick to trust and they're stubborn. When you speak with them, do so in ways that promote trust, respect, openness, and safety.
In essence, you're going to have to kill them with kindness. Taurus may feel the need to test you to see if your intentions are good. However, passing their tests is only the beginning.
GEMINI (May 21 - June 20)
Geminis are masters at communication, so just talking isn't going to cut it if you want to break through their walls. You're probably going to have to prove that you're trustworthy with your actions.
Let them tell you something in confidence and then keep it to yourself forever. Prove that to them that if they confide in you, you won't turn around and hurt them. Be worthy of their trust and you'll be rewarded.
CANCER (June 21 - July 22)
With a Cancer, the more you share of yourself, the more likely they are to allow their walls to come down. When you sit down with Cancer, make sure you center yourself, are grounded, and show your willingness to listen to what they're saying.
Cancer wants to be able to fully open up, but they have to trust that they won't get hurt in the process. They may have been burned before, and they're going to be careful that it doesn't happen again.
LEO (July 23 - August 22)
When trying to break through Leo's emotional walls, be straightforward and let them know how important having a foundation of trust in a relationship is to you. Focus on them, hear what their response is, and then go from there.
If Leo takes control of the conversation, follow their lead, and don't try to take it back. These individuals are kind and will help you if you let them. Loyalty is also important to a Leo, so prove your loyalty by supporting them when they need it.
VIRGO (August 23 - September 22)
Virgos are too smart to open up to you if you haven't proven yourself to be reliable, authentic, and trustworthy. Virgos are watchful and if you've been flaky in the past or told secrets, they'll remember, and the likelihood of them ever trusting you is slim.
If your past with them is limited or clean, show them you're a person of good character and would never betray them. If you want to open up to them, only tell your own secrets, never anybody else's.
LIBRA (September 23 - October 22)
If you want to break through Libra's walls, be there when they need you, even if it's inconvenient. You're going to have to back up your claims of being trustworthy and loyal. Don't be the person you think they want you to be — be yourself.
Show them you're flawed but that your heart is in the right place, and that if they trust you they're not going to regret it down the line.
SCORPIO (October 23 - November 21)
With Scorpio, getting them to open up to you isn't going to take swapping stories over a few beers — it will be a long and arduous journey. Scorpio will test you, and even then they might not trust you.
Keep showing that you're legit and only want to have better communication and a deeper relationship. Warning: when you've earned Scorpio's trust, treat it like the valuable thing that it is because if you betray them or abuse their faith in you, they will want retribution.
SAGITTARIUS (November 22 - December 21)
Sagittarius will be grateful if you're honest and direct with them. Tell them where you're coming from in regards to having a relationship of sharing and trust. Don't try to fool them or pretend you have other motives.
Be there when they need you, give sound advice if they ask for it, and don't get angry if they say something tactless or get angry with you out of nowhere. Any negativity will pass quickly, and you've shown that you're not going to get scared away easily.
CAPRICORN (December 22 - January 19)
Capricorns can be somewhat distrusting, so if you want to get them to break down their walls, you have your work cut out for you. Don't spring it on them out of context that you want them to be more open with you. Tread lightly, and when the time is right, sit down with them and tell them how you feel.
Capricorns will feel flattered that you are interested in working on your relationship and hoping that with openness will come closeness. They are cautious but they're not closed down, so if you prove yourself trustworthy, they'll do their part.
AQUARIUS (January 20 - February 18)
Proving yourself trustworthy enough for Aquarius to break down their defenses and let you in is going to be tricky. You can't just open up emotionally and hope they do the same. You're going to have to appeal to them intellectually and almost create a case where you give evidence on why they should let you in.
Aquarians are emotionally independent and can be aloof. You need to show them how breaking down their walls with you will benefit them.
PISCES (February 19 - March 20)
If Pisces has a fortress up, they've been hurt before and can't stand the thought of it happening again. They've given people many chances only to be hurt again and again. You'll need to show them how they're safe with you and how trusting you will make things better.
You may appeal to them through their artistic side, or show them how compassionate and caring you can be. Know that if you're not sincere, it will be devastating to Pisces.
Christine Schoenwald is a writer, performer, and astrology lover. She has written over 500 articles on the zodiac signs and how the stars influence us. She's had articles in The Los Angeles Times, Salon, Woman's Day, and is a contributing writer to Ravishly, I AM & CO, and YourTango. Check out her website or and her Instagram.