5 Reasons It's Better To Be The 'Crazy' Person In Every Relationship

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henry the 8th meets anne boleyn in aisle 7

Because "normal," "predictable" and "accountable" are boring.

Is there anything better than having zero accountability but no less than 50 percent of the authority? It's like being the entitled youngest child of a third world dictator. Other than the strong likelihood of serious human rights violations as a result of your demigod-like infallibility, what could go wrong?

You can do this by being the crazy person in your relationship. Trust me, I've been the least crazy person in a relationship and it's for the birds. By the power of math, one person is likely to be "crazier" than the other because it's almost impossible to find someone who's exactly as crazy as you are.

Why would someone even want to date a crazy person? We've managed to romanticize crazy in a number of ways. We generally think of a crazy person as willing to go to extremes for love, is a wildcat in the sack, and may be straddling the kind of genius-insane line that it takes to invent lasers, group texting or Reddit. And people these days appreciate surprises. 

But that miniscule level of incremental crazy variance just isn't enough; you'll need a full standard deviation on the spectrum of "unreasonable." Here's how:

1. Your hang-ups will make sense later on.

This includes sex, food, germs, and so on. None of these things make you even remotely unusual, but later on they'll seem like a clue someone was really dumb to have missed. 

2. It's a great way to justify bad behavior.

Say things like, "It's because I'm CRAZY!" but please don't use any euphemisms or other languages to pass this sentiment along. Its contrivance will seem premeditated and I think we're all over "cray-cray," unless talking about the super computer

3. You can milk everything for what it's worth.

We live in a world in which data of all kinds is readily available, yet it's trumped in almost all cases by experiential evidence and how it made one feel. And that's where being a little crazy can go a long way. It's never what a person said or did, but how they said or did it.

Communication is key to a healthy relationship, but that's not what we're looking for. We're looking for the kind of one-sided relationship that only looks healthy. 

4. You can hone your acting skills by learning to cry at the drop of a hat.

This is part of why people think that performers are crazy: they're ready to cry for almost no reason. You may have to hit below the belt here and there. But it's OK, because the rules of fair play go out the window when one of you is "crazy" in the same way the Geneva Convention only applies to uniformed soldiers.

Bring up stuff that happened in past relationships, within your family, in other lifetimes, or even to fictional characters whom you see as an avatar or spirit animal. Who cares? This isn't a court of law.

5. Making crazy sh*t up is just WAY too fun.

Not being totally plugged into reality is part of what makes crazy go. There's a great story about football coach Jim Harbaugh attributing his own faux pas to his opposing coach in order to get his team fired up.

The bottom line is that you want to be right, and never have to apologize or feel bad for your behavior. Life is too short for anyone who isn't willing to love you exclusively on your own terms.