How to Find the Elusive Orgasm


I am hoping that what I learned will help you to reach orgasm every time you have sex too.

I decided to write this blog for all my sisters who have yet to find the elusive orgasm. I can say that I used to be among you ladies… I would orgasm maybe once a year but I never knew why or what was done to cause it. It wasn’t until I met a man that cared about pleasing me, that I experimented with different positions, talked about what felt good and what didn’t, before I finally learned to orgasm through intercourse. Although, I had found my orgasm it was still not an easy task and I often didn’t try to orgasm because it was too much work…. Over time I found a way to orgasm every time I have sex, not just once but several times. I am hoping that what I learned will help you to reach orgasm every time you have sex too.

What prevents a woman from reaching orgasm?

We as women hold the entire world on our shoulders. We often work jobs we can’t stand with people that get on our nerves. We often carry the sole responsibility of providing for our families financially. We take care of our children and have to deal with their stresses, failures, and issues. We sometimes have the burden of caring for our parents if they are ill. My goodness, it is amazing we have the energy to have sex at all.

Now we add to this the stress of trying to orgasm when we have had difficulty in the past. We worry if we are doing it right/performance anxiety. We have poor body image perception. We are dealing with past negative baggage from bad relationships and lets not forget that 1 in every 5 women have been sexually abused, molested or raped. We have so much to overcome.

So what do we do?

First, we have to relax and rid ourselves of all negative thoughts regarding intimacy. Quiet your mind, focus totally on feeling sexy and aroused… focus on your man, enjoying his smell, the way his skin feels, his voice, and the little things he says. Accept that our female figures are beautiful and sexually attractive. Yes damn it, you are beautiful, sexy, and attractive and guess what… your man finds you irresistible! No self-rejection allowed here. J

Second, you must allow yourself to imagine how excited you will feel. When you and your man begin touching each other, allow yourself to get as sexually excited as possible. Be so excited you can barely stand it. Starting intercourse before you are fully aroused could kill the chances of reaching orgasm.

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