11 Things Baby Boomers Think Are Respectful But Drive Younger People Insane

While studies do suggest that healing the generational gap could be as simple as remembering one simple belief — that everyone is yearning to feel valued — many of the tensions that separate baby boomers from their younger counterparts actively sabotage those basic feelings of respect, connection, and respect.

Many of the things baby boomers think are respectful but drive younger people insane are also simply differences in values. Each generation grew up in a very different time, with different priorities, parenting styles, and societal expectations. What may seem like an obvious display of mutual respect to one generation is an annoyance to the other, making healthy communication, connection, and general understanding that much harder.

Here are 11 things baby boomers think are respectful but drive younger people insane

1. Expectations to respect elders

young man respecting elder woman fizkes | Shutterstock

While it's certainly not a new trend for younger generations to want to distance themselves from their parents' and grandparents' generations, according to cultural expert Lawrence R. Samuel, it can fuel current generational divides in unique ways. For example, baby boomers often have strong ties to family and work ethic, which fuels their belief that younger generations should listen to and respect elders simply because of their age.

However, this is one of the things baby boomers think are respectful but drive younger people crazy, largely because Gen Z is more comfortable with setting boundaries and advocating for their mental health, even if it means holding their "elders" to higher standards.

2. Calling instead of texting

boomer woman calling instead of texting fizkes | Shutterstock

Many younger generations feel entirely uncomfortable talking on the phone, especially as their social anxiety heightens and the convenience of texting becomes more prevalent. However, for baby boomers, who believe calls are more sentimental and familiar than texting, it's not uncommon for them to use phone calls as their primary means of communication.

However, it's one of the things baby boomers think are respectful that drive younger people crazy, especially when they're forced to answer an unprompted phone call without warning in the middle of the day.

3. Showing up unannounced

boomer parents showing up unannounced at adult childrens door Monkey Business Images | Shutterstock

Many baby boomers place a strong emphasis on family values and connection in their daily lives, fueling them to stay connected with their loved ones — sometimes, even stopping by unannounced. While for these older generations, it may seem like a matter of respect — taking the time out of their day to reach out or check-in; for their younger counterparts, it's occasionally a nuisance.

Not only do they appreciate having time to get ready and prepare themselves for social interaction, it's a basic ritual of respect — especially for younger generations — to give notice before showing up at someone's space.

4. Giving unsolicited advice

boomer man giving young man unsolicited advice fizkes | Shutterstock

Many younger generations struggle with older generations' tendency to give unsolicited advice, especially in situations where they're only looking for emotional support or affection. They are more interested in protecting their mental health and acknowledging their emotions than simply "solving" their problems, which leads to conversations where they feel invalidated and dismissed.

It's one of the things baby boomers think are respectful but drive younger people insane and often causes a lot of tension in familial relationships and workplace connections.

5. Using titles

boomer man expecting son to use titles with him pixelheadphoto digitalskillet | Shutterstock

Using titles like "sir" or "miss" is often a sign of formality and respect for older generations — a status symbol, in some cases — that only drives younger people insane. Not only is it gender-assuming — something generations like Gen Z are more conscious of than baby boomers in their everyday lives — it also can feel stiff, rigid, and overly formal.

That's why it's one of the things baby boomers think are respectful but drive younger people insane. It's a mismatch in values, interests, and habits when it comes to social interactions, both in personal and professional spaces.

6. Writing thank you cards for everything

boomer woman writing thank you cards in her living room Roman Samborskyi | Shutterstock

According to experts from Harvard Health, writing handwritten thank you notes is often a practice that bolsters relationship health and self-esteem — it's essentially a gratitude practice. While there are certainly situations where Gen Zers and millennials are thanking people for gifts, support, and advice, they're much less likely to personally write out everything by hand than boomers.

That's why it's one of the things baby boomers think are respectful but drive younger people insane, as they don't want to feel pressured to write handwritten letters, especially if they're already thanking people online in a more convenient way.

7. Endless job loyalty

boomer woman being loyal to her job Ground Picture | Shutterstock

While baby boomers are more likely to stay loyal to companies and a job at their own expense, Gen Zers and millennials are far more interested in protecting their own personal time and work-life balance. That's why endless professional loyalty is one of the things baby boomers think are respectful — like not applying to other jobs or asking for raises — that drive younger people insane.

Younger generations are far less likely to invest in "hustle culture" — instead concerned with finding a company and job that suits their best interests, whether that's a healthy work-life balance, aligned purpose, or co-workers they enjoy.

8. Following a strict dress code

professional boomer woman following a strict dress code at work Ground Picture | Shutterstock

According to a study from the University of La Verne, many baby boomers are far more interested in following traditional norms at work — from following company loyalty expectations to aligning their clothing with strict and rigid dress codes.

Whether it's judging tattoos, judging people for expressing individuality, or promoting rigid gendered dress codes, these are some of the things baby boomers think are respectful but drive younger people insane.

Gen Zers and millennials are far more interested in stretching the boundaries of these dress codes, believing that true mutual respect and empathy would mean giving people the chance to express themselves in comfortable and individual ways.

9. Refusing to swear

frustrated boomer man refusing to swear PR Image Factory | Shutterstock

Considering baby boomers tend to swear much less than their Gen Z counterparts, it's not surprising that it's one of the things they think are matters of respect that younger people find insane. It's a version of linguistic style amongst Gen Zers — part of their identity and social connection — but for boomers, it tends to be a disrespectful habit.

So, even if it's simply a matter of differences of value and mutual respect, it's a contributing factor to the tension between younger generations and their boomer counterparts.

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10. Assuming age equates to intellect

boomer woman talking down to young woman fizkes | Shutterstock

While research does suggest that intelligence and IQ tends to grow with age in the average person — a mix of life experience and practical knowledge — dismissing younger individuals, professionals, and generations for their lack of sheer age is not only invalidating but isolating. It's part of the reason why the generational gap, especially in places like the workplace, continues to deepen between baby boomers and their younger counterparts.

Of course, each generation has their own set of skills, life experiences, and abilities that the other may lack, which is why assuming age equates to IQ or intelligence is one of the things baby boomers think is respectful, but drives their younger counterparts insane.

11. Separating from technology

young gen z woman showing boomer man technology fizkes | Shutterstock

While many baby boomers who prefer to have conversations and interactions without phones do have a valid reason — at least according to a PLOS One study that suggests the mere presence of a phone can distract people from a productive conversation — it's one of the things that drives younger people insane.

Especially for Gen Z and other generations that work, connect, and form belonging on their phones, separating completely from technology feels overwhelming and disillusioning in many cases. So, while disconnecting for a conversation or a few hours may be tough, it can help to facilitate strong conversations and connections.

Zayda Slabbekoorn is a staff writer with a bachelor's degree in social relations & policy and gender studies who focuses on psychology, relationships, self-help, and human interest stories.