If You Actually Enjoy Staying In, You'll Naturally Avoid These 11 Social Obligations
Introverted homebodies need time alone to recharge.
Try_my_best | Shutterstock If you're a true homebody at heart, you probably resonate strongly with introverted habits and dislikes. From saying "no" to plans made at the last minute or going to crowded parties with strangers you've never met, if you actually enjoy staying in, you'll naturally avoid these social obligations. It's not that you're anti-social or hate being around other people, you just prefer to spend your time with close friends and family who add meaning and depth to your life.
Of course, according to Harvard's Dr. Richard Schwartz, social interaction and positive relationships are all essential to our well-being and daily routines, but for introverts and homebodies, it's more nuanced to find a space to connect. Not only do they need to find alone time to recharge their social batteries, they also need to be around people who are capable of engaging in meaningful conversation without superficiality.
If you actually enjoy staying in, you’ll naturally avoid these 11 social obligations
1. Last-minute plans
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If they can use an excuse to get out of last-minute plans, they will. Especially if they don't have the time to prepare to leave the house or the space for regulation to refill their social battery before going out, chances are they'll naturally avoid these social obligations, even if everyone else is going.
They have a preference for alone time, of course, but they also often need solitude to feel energized enough to go out with friends and say "yes" to social events. That's why 5- or 10-minute warnings and last-minute plans hardly ever work out.
2. Networking events
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While experts agree that networking and making professional connections are critical to success, many workers and employees find it to be endlessly draining. According to the Harvard Business Review, the key to staying energized in the face of networking obligations is to prioritize quality interactions, rather than quantity.
Don't overwork yourself trying to make small talk with everyone, but set limits to interactions that protect your well-being. Of course, if you're inherently introverted and actually enjoy staying in, you'll naturally avoid these social obligations altogether.
3. Work dinners and happy hours
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Whether it's dinners after a full day of togetherness on a work trip or going out for drinks with co-workers after hours, if you actually enjoy staying in, you'll naturally avoid these social obligations. Chances are you're an introvert at heart, needing time to decompress, recharge, and reflect without the burdens of small talk circling you.
Even if that means avoiding social situations and events that are typically obligatory, people who prefer their alone time will make any excuse to retreat into solitude.
4. Overcrowded parties
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Whether it's a friend's party, a random weekend night out, or a concert, if you actually enjoy staying in, you'll naturally avoid these social obligations. Not only are they overstimulating for introverted people who typically have a lower threshold for arousal, according to a study from Personality and Individual Differences, they're also often defined by small talk and superficial conversations.
You may still love and cherish social time, but prefer to structure it around people and environments that are more fulfilling and meaningful.
5. Weddings for distant friends
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Of course, when someone takes the time and energy to invite you to a wedding, it's rude not to show up or make excuses to stay home. Even for people who don't like going out, these are compromises they may make to show up for their loved ones.
However, they often prefer to avoid these social obligations, already dreading the small talk they'll have to make with a random table of people and distant relatives. Even dancing in front of people feels impossible for someone who's a homebody at heart.
6. Random group trips
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Considering a ton of friends going on group trips experience some kind of disagreement or conflict — usually around money, according to an Experian study — saying "yes" to these events is something homebodies typically avoid.
Rather than go out for the sake of coping with "FOMO" or solidifying their place in a friendship, they prefer spending time at home, or planning a trip by themselves or with close friends that they know and trust well.
7. Going out for the weekend
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While extroverted people may pressure their friends into going out "just because" it's the weekend, if you actually enjoy staying in, you'll naturally avoid these social obligations.
You appreciate the solitude and space of a weekend to unwind, so even if you technically "don't have any plans," you'd prefer to spend that time at home, relaxing, and indulging in your own personal habits than making small talk with strangers.
8. Working in-person
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If you have the choice to work remotely or go into an office, if you enjoy staying home, obviously, you're going to avoid going into work. Whether it's long meetings that drain your energy or open office concepts that promote more small talk than is realistically necessary, you yearn for a sense of solitude during the workday, no matter where you are.
Of course, according to a study from the Journal of Environmental Psychology, open office concepts and in-person environments can occasionally boost company culture, but for introverted people and those who prefer solitude, they're a nightmare to navigate.
9. Family reunions
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According to the American Psychological Association, even happy and exciting holiday seasons can be stressful and draining for the majority of people. Holiday parties and family reunions revolve around small talk, which can be draining for introverted people but also wasteful for people who prefer to spend time alone at home.
Even high school reunions are draining — putting a ton of pressure on superficial conversations, rooted in the desire to boast and brag about success. So, if you actually enjoy staying in, you'll naturally avoid these social obligations, even if everyone else is going.
10. Group dinners
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Introverted people tend to appreciate one-on-one conversations with close friends and family more than group conversations or crowded social events. They may also be inherently quieter than others, so they often feel dismissed and overlooked in group settings with louder, more extroverted people.
So, if you actually enjoy staying in, you'll probably naturally avoid the social obligation of a group debate or conversations, because you're not saying "yes" to things like group dinners, vacations, or nights out.
11. Volunteer commitments
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While volunteering actively does promote many health benefits, from boosting mental health to crafting social community, and even supporting physiological processes, if you enjoy staying in, you'll naturally avoid these social obligations. Obviously, being a homebody doesn't mean you're not empathetic or generous to larger causes, but when you're already feeling drained and socially empty, it's impossible to make time for them.
You may find ways to give back in other ways, whether it's donating money or being an online advocate, because when you don't look out for yourself, you can't help anyone.
Zayda Slabbekoorn is a senior editorial strategist with a bachelor's degree in social relations & policy and gender studies who focuses on psychology, relationships, self-help, and human interest stories.
