11 Phrases Actual Homebodies Say Often (And What They Actually Mean)
It's also perfectly okay to just say no, but sometimes it doesn't feel that simple.
YouAreMagic Space / Shutterstock Many homebodies and introverted people who prefer time at home over social interactions in public share similar priorities in life. While they do tend to cultivate healthy relationships and social circles, they also make room in their schedules for intentional solitude. They are strong advocates for their own needs, whether that be a need for relaxation, time to decompress, or space to recharge their social batteries.
While many people are demonized for saying no too often or for cancelling plans in our hyper-social and busy culture, the phrases actual homebodies say often protect themselves from falling into a guilt spiral. Many are based on ensuring other people feel heard and valued, while still being clear about boundaries and personal priorities.
Here are 11 phrases actual homebodies say often and what they actually mean
1. ‘I would, but I’m pretty busy’
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When a homebody uses a phrase like “I’m pretty busy” or “I have a full calendar already,” what they really mean is they’re not interested in social interaction. Whether it’s a drained social battery or time carved out for solitude, homebodies would prefer to spend time in their own comfortable spaces and doing things that add value to their life, rather than draining themselves with social interactions and connections that aren’t actively doing the same.
According to a study conducted by The Ohio State University, more than 50% of people say that alone time is vital to safeguarding and protecting their mental health. Whether it’s for healthy hobbies, time for self-reflection, or a moment of peace after a chaotic day, many homebodies would prefer to use a phrase like this rather than try to explain their need for solitude to extroverts that recharge in completely different social ways.
2. ‘We’ll get together another time’
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Whether you’re a self-proclaimed homebody or not, you’ve probably felt the relief of someone cancelling plans, knowing you’d rather cozy up on the couch and stay home anyway. When someone responds in a thoughtful way to someone canceling plans, even if it’s last minute, chances are they’re actually pretty excited about not having to get ready or leave their house.
Of course, they’re not going to come right out and say they’re excited, but when someone else is honest about canceling plans, which a study from the University of California suggests is the best way to break the news, they’ll use a phrase like this to reassure their friends and peers.
3. ‘I’m sorry, a bunch of stuff came up’
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For a homebody, a phrase like this doesn’t always mean they have other plans, a million chores, or family responsibilities to catch up on, but rather a number of other stressful things that might’ve drained their social battery. They’re not missing out on plans or cancelling on social interactions for another event, but rather protecting their own energy by carving out space to de-stress and decompress.
Whether you’re a corporate employee or a stay-at-home parent, protecting space for mindfulness practices and solitude can be incredibly beneficial for protecting your mental health, according to a study published in the Journal of Occupational Health, which is why so many homebodies use phrases like this to safeguard this intentional space.
4. ‘Sorry, I didn’t see your call’
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According to Sophia Dembling, the author of “The Introvert’s Way: Living a Quiet Life in a Noisy World,” many introverts find online communication without warning — like a FaceTime or phone call — to feel intrusive and anxiety-inducing. Introverts take time to respond and craft their messages, which can make immediate calls and even in-person conversations feel overwhelming and superficial. Hence, their tendency to stay home.
This is one of the phrases actual homebodies say often because it’s not always that they truly missed your call. They weren’t “asleep” or distracted. They’d just prefer to have an offline conversation where they can take time to craft a thoughtful response.
5. ‘I'll take a rain check’
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Many of the phrases actual homebodies say often are justifications for avoiding social interactions when they’re feeling draining or thoughtfully responding to people who invite them out. Rain checks and excuses are the key, making other people feel heard while still protecting your energy.
If you’re on the other side of a relationship with a homebody, asking them to come out, inviting them to social events, and trying to cope with these phrases, don’t take it personally. People have different kinds of social batteries for a reason, just because they say no to social events from time-to-time doesn’t mean they don’t want to hang out with you, they’re just looking out for their own well-being.
6. ‘Maybe next time’
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As long as you’re ensuring the other person feels heard and valued, as a study published in PLOS One suggests is the best way to keep and maintain healthy social connections, using a phrase like this to set boundaries and say no to social events is perfectly valid.
You don't have to say yes to social plans that you know will drain you, show up for people when they’re not doing the same for you, or overlook your needs for the sake of appeasing others all of the time. Of course, social interaction and getting out of your comfort zone is necessary from time-to-time, but homebodies should feel empowered to stay home and enjoy solitude when it suits them.
A phrase like “maybe next time” isn’t an excuse to not go out or delay having to go to a social event, it’s a reminder of a homebody’s boundaries. They don’t need to commit right now to saying yes. They can show up and go out when it feels right.
7. ‘I’m not really feeling up to it’
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Setting boundaries in relationships as a homebody can feel uncomfortable, especially when you’re surrounded by incredibly sociable and extroverted people that are always looking for an excuse to go out or get together. A phrase like “I’m not really feeling up for it today” should speak for itself, as there’s no deeper meaning, but many people feel a need to explain when they use it to protect their social battery.
While clarifications and open communication can ensure everyone feels heard and understood, homebodies shouldn’t feel pressured to over-explain themselves for setting a boundary like this. Saying no is perfectly valid and acceptable, especially when you’re looking out for your own well-being.
8. ‘I’ve already got a full weekend planned’
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A study published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology found that many people deal with anxiety and fear over saying no to social invitations and events. However, many of the phrases actual homebodies say often often assist people in overcoming this fear because they set boundaries without making other people feel uncomfortable or unheard.
While it may not be other social events, trips, or plans that are technically planned with others for the weekend, an introvert’s schedule, whether it’s time for a hobby or intentional self-care time alone, is just as important to prioritize for their well-being as an extrovert’s need for social interaction.
9. ‘I just need to decompress’
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Phrases like “I just need to decompress” are common for actual homebodies on a daily basis. After a hard day at work, an overly sociable weekend, or even a couple hours of social interaction, they may genuinely need space to unwind, relax, and recharge their social batteries.
Whether it’s meditation and mindfulness, two practices that studies show enhance relaxation, or alone time to engage in fun hobbies and interests, decompression looks different for everyone and has the power to promote better emotional balance, especially in introverted homebodies.
10. ‘Let me get back to you’
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Many introverts need time to craft thoughtful and intentional responses to people, so when they feel the need to say no to social events or plans, they still need that same space. To ensure they’re able to advocate for themselves without falling victim to peer pressure or sabotaging a a healthy relationship dynamic by making someone feel unheard, they take the time necessary to craft their response, even if they know they want to say no from the start.
It’s this kind of intentionality that allows homebodies and introverts to maintain meaningful long-term relationships. They’re not only looking out for themselves, but for other people along the way.
11. ‘I don’t want to overdo it’
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According to psychology professor Debra Rose Wilson, it’s not uncommon for homebodies and introverts to struggle with their social batteries in public. While extroverts have the ability to recharge around other people and through social interactions, homebodies need alone time to rest, reflect, and recharge.
A phrase like “I don’t want to overdo it” may seem foreign to an extrovert who enjoys social interaction without limits or reservation, but for homebodies, they oftentimes have to be more intentional about how they spend their energy and time.
Zayda Slabbekoorn is a staff writer with a bachelor’s degree in social relations & policy and gender studies who focuses on psychology, relationships, self-help, and human interest stories.
