11 Things People Who Think They're Better Than You Say & Do Often
Their overconfidence is hard to ignore.
Kues | Shutterstock While there are certainly a lot of benefits to being a self-assured and confident individual — from emotional intelligence, to high self-awareness, and a strong tool set for crafting healthier relationships, like a study from the Indian Journal of Positive Psychology suggests — being misguidedly overconfident tends to have the opposite effect. In fact, many people who are overconfident and believe they're better than everyone else tend to be less competent and accurate.
There are definitely things people who think they're better than you say and do often, but just because they're overly confident or loud doesn't mean they're actually more successful. Their boldness, egocentric attitude, and confidence is more misguided than it seems, even if it's uncomfortable and forces you to consider your own insecurities and shortcomings.
Here are 11 things people who think they're better than you say and do often
1. They name-drop often
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Name-dropping is one of the things people who think they're better than you say and do often. They are desperate to paint a very specific picture of their lives, even if that means perpetuating a misleading narrative about their success, connections, wealth, and health.
According to a study from the Athens Journal of Mass Media and Communications, many people name-drop and "one-up" others In conversations and social situations to cope with their own internal anxiety and insecurity. So, even if they're putting on a facade of confidence and success, their social behaviors and habits tend to tell a very different story.
2. They correct you in public
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To assert their misguided dominance in social situations, work meetings, and public settings, many people who think they're better than you will make an effort to embarrass you around others. Whether it's calling out your behavior in an obviously harsh way or correcting you in the middle of a conversation, they don't mind bringing you down to promote their own social image.
Whether it's online or in-person, people tend to get defensive when they're corrected on a public forum, which not only harms personal relationship well-being, but also others' self-esteem and trust.
3. They brag about goals too early
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According to professor of psychology and human development Marwa Azab, many people brag about their goals and achievements before they even realize them — trying to paint a narrative that they're intelligent, successful, and disciplined, even if they haven't taken any action yet.
Not only does this sabotage their true productivity when it comes to achieving those goals, it tends to be a misguided coping mechanism for internalized shame and insecurity. Even if everyone around them is annoyed, they'll continue to brag about success and flaunt goals they haven't achieved, trying to make other people envious of them, even at the expense of true connection.
4. They use overcomplicated words
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Even though research, like one study from WIREs Cognitive Science, argues that truly intelligent people tend to simplify things — from language, to work tasks, and social interactions — to ensure everyone feels heard and engaged, overconfident people make an effort to do the opposite.
Using overcomplicated words and phrases is one of the things they'll always do and say to purport a narrative that they're smarter, more prestigious, and successful, even if they have no clue what they're talking about.
They're more interested in crafting social skills and habits that make them look better and that compensate for their internal insecurity, even at the expense of true connection and relationship-building with others.
5. They look at their phone when you're speaking
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Even though studies, like one from PLOS One, vehemently argue that phones are detrimental to social connection and general well-being, many people who think they're better than everyone else will still rely on them for distraction and stimulation.
Even if it negatively affects bonding in social situations or their personal contributions to a conversation, if they think they're better than someone, they don't mind scrolling or responding to texts in a conversation with them. This behavior is also intertwined in narcissistic behaviors — like chasing status in conversations with people who they view to have value for their own lives.
If they don't think they have something to personally gain by speaking to or interacting with someone, they're easily distracted by things like phone notifications or the people sitting nearby.
6. They talk about their salary often
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People who think they're better than you will say or do anything to protect their own ego. Oftentimes, it's overconfidence and status-driven behaviors that ironically point to people's internal insecurity, like a study from Personality and Individual Differences suggests, which is why they'll lean on anything, from money to status symbols, to compensate.
If they make a decent amount of money and place a lot of social stock in financial freedom, they'll bring it up all the time in conversations. The same goes for other generic status symbols like designer clothing, free-time, and fancy cars — if they have it, they'll brag about it nonstop to feel seen and admired by others.
7. They give backhanded compliments
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Whether it's in the workplace or in their personal relationships, backhanded compliments can have negative consequences on social belonging, self-esteem, and relationships, according to experts from Harvard Business School.
Coping with deep-rooted internal insecurity and loneliness, people who try to keep up with the narrative that they're better than everyone else tend to rely on backhanded compliments to assert their dominance. Even if it's a passive-aggressive comment or speaking negatively about someone in a public setting, they don't mind putting other people down to reassert their misguided superiority.
8. They rarely share
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Whether it's sharing knowledge, giving people genuine advice, or even being open with their friend groups and social plans, sharing is one of the things people who think they're better than you rarely do.
According to studies from the University of California, many people adopt overly confident personality traits and mentalities to achieve a certain level of social status. Once they form this misguided perception in social situations and their relationships, they're protective over keeping it up to a certain standard.
Even though psychology experts agree that helping people and offering genuine prompted advice can build true self-esteem and more positive relationships, they'd prefer to gatekeep and avoid sharing to keep other people lower on their status scale than them.
9. They're rude to service workers
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According to psychologist Reena B. Patel, people tend to lash out at service workers to cope with their own internal discomfort, making a scapegoat out of anyone who's around them. When they're rude to service workers or mean to people serving them, they find an outlet for coping with their stress, anxiety, and insecurity, even if it's entirely misguided.
So, for overconfident people that do their best to impress everyone and maintain superiority, it's not surprising that they form misguided opinions of people in society and take their deep-rooted anger out on them. It's one of the things people who think they're better than everyone else do often — motivated by toxic beliefs about money, status, and prestige.
10. They make everything a competition
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Many people who are inherently hyper-competitive are motivated by external factors, which is why truly confident and self-assured people are often more focused with personal growth and skill development than competing with others.
However, turning everything into a competition is one of the things people who think they're better than you say and do often, because it's the only way they can misguidedly reaffirm their misguided internal stability. Whether it's a jealous friend or an envious partner, people who turn everything into an unhealthy competition that isolates them from true growth and connection.
11. They give unsolicited advice
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Many people, especially women, tend to feel less heard, valued, and appreciated in conversations with people who give unsolicited advice, according to a study from Psychological Science. Especially in conversations where someone's just looking for emotional support, being offered solutions for getting rid of their experiences can be dismissive and invalidating.
However, for people who think they're better than everyone else, they often view their advice as a gift, whether it's asked for or not. They believe their emotional intelligence, intellect, and knowledge is something to be cherished, which is why they give it out often and expect celebration for offering it, even when it makes other people feel less heard.
Zayda Slabbekoorn is a staff writer with a bachelor’s degree in social relations & policy and gender studies who focuses on psychology, relationships, self-help, and human interest stories.
