LOL: If Your Ex-BFs Were Ken Dolls, Here's What They'd Look Like

ken dolls


Barbie just got a makeover. In order to increase representation and diversity, Mattel has created 33 new Barbies. You can now purchase (via the Mattel website) three body types (petite, tall and curvy), seven skin tones, 22 eye colors, and 14 face sculpts.

With so many changes for Barbie, you'd think her ex main man Ken would get a makeover, too. Well, he has — though not officially. Lyst, the fashion curating brand, has given Ken a realistic image re-imagining.

Photo: Lyst

One thing seems clear: the revamped Kens have a lot more personality than boring old regular Ken with this cast of characters. As someone who used to play with Barbies, I know how to give a good back story to the dolls, and this is how I see these re-imagined Kens.

1. Hot African-American Ken lives in Williamsburg, New York, and is a musician and a single dad. If you listen to him sing his original songs to his kids, your heart will melt. 

2. Aging surfer dude Ken was cool about ten years ago, but now his game is decidedly stale. He lives in his parent's garage apartment and is always confused when the women he brings home are less-than-impressed. He eats bacon-wrapped jalapeno peppers every day.

3. Tight-ass businessman Ken has literally bored someone to death. Don't ask him about what he does for a living or you might find yourself wanting to stab yourself in the neck.

4. Gay lifeguard Ken gave up a Fortune 500 career to be a lifeguard and has a sweet life in Hawaii. Whatever you do, don't annoy him or he will "Bye Felicia " you so fast, you won't know what hit you.

5, Trans-Ken is making the transition to being a Lumbersexual male, and is the happiest he's ever been working in an artisan cheese shop in Seattle.

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6. Creepy middle school science teacher Ken lives with his elderly mother — presumably to take care of her, but it may be so she can keep an eye on him. No charges have ever been filed, but one hopes that like the original Ken, he's got no junk.