11 Things That Instantly Annoy Wholesome People With Good Values
If someone has a good heart, certain things set them off almost immediately.
Inside Creative House | Shutterstock Everyone knows at least one person who is undeniably wholesome. It's as if their heart is made of gold, and they do whatever it takes to bring sunshine to the people around them. But just because they are kind-hearted, it doesn't mean there aren't things that instantly annoy wholesome people with good values.
It might seem hard to believe, especially because these individuals have such an understanding nature, and don't outwardly show an ounce of contempt for others. Still, they are human, and there are certain behaviors they simply won't tolerate.
Here are 11 things that instantly annoy wholesome people with good values
1. Passive-aggressive behavior
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Wholesome people are the first to lead with respect and kindness. No matter how bad things get, they never falter on their morals or become passive-aggressive. Unfortunately, not everyone has self-control over their emotions. Blame it on their upbringing or personality, but some people weren't taught emotional intelligence, causing them to resort to backhanded behavior.
Unfortunately, according to a 2024 study, people who lack emotional intelligence get stressed easily, are more likely to have depression and anxiety, and are more passive-aggressive. This is why wholesome people avoid passive-aggressive people at all costs. Despite needing to deal with them at work, they won't watch people be rude or dismissive.
2. Disrespect towards service workers
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No matter how a person spins it, service workers are there to help and do their jobs. So, for someone to intentionally be rude to someone who can't even defend themselves, it's a sign of serious power issues. This is why it's one of the things that instantly annoy wholesome people with good values.
Yes, it's annoying to wait on the phone or feel frustrated by an order being wrong. However, these service workers are human beings and, most importantly, aren't always responsible for the mistakes being made. So, while your frustration is understandable, it isn't rightfully directed.
Unfortunately, some people don't care. Wanting to have a power trip, they intentionally stir the pot to verbally abuse or inconvenience others. Yet, all that unnecessary anger only backfires as, according to a study published in the Journal of Medicine and Life, those with chronic anger are more likely to make decisions that lead to poor health behaviors.
3. Cruel gossip
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Everyone's heard gossip or been a part of it, as it's one of those things that's unavoidable. But for wholesome people, it's downright cruel. Maybe it's because they feel bad for others, but overall they just hate rude behavior.
The other person could have made a million and one mistakes, but in a wholesome person's eyes, their mistakes aren't enough to warrant relentless bullying or nasty stares. Instead, they spread kindness and subtly shut gossip down.
According to a study published in Frontiers in Public Health, people with a more positive work environment are more likely to have positive work output, showing just how important it is to keep things lighthearted. While it might be strange being the odd one out, finding ways to shift the conversation is the best way for everyone to feel good.
4. Dismissing boundaries
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Everyone needs boundaries to make it through life. Whether it's at work or in their relationships, boundaries are set in place to help people avoid burnout and stick to their bottom line. Some boundaries take getting used to, though. If someone is naturally affectionate, it might take a few months to remember consistently to avoid hugging or being touchy-feely with friends.
Even so, some people disregard boundaries entirely, pretending like they never existed in the first place. As social psychologist Shawn M. Burn revealed, "A lack of healthy boundaries can harm our emotional, psychological, physical, or financial health, and negatively impact our other relationships. Without good boundaries, we can enable unacceptable behavior by rewarding it."
5. Making fun of others
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Making fun of others is one of the things that instantly annoy wholesome people with good values, as this practice has become extremely normalized, especially with social media, which has incentivized many to act cruel towards others simply because there are zero consequences.
Being rude isn't funny, and people have feelings, no matter how much someone says, "It was just a joke." And while many people don't view these jokes as a big deal, according to a 2017 study, being bullied often leads to worse mental health outcomes.
6. Refusing to apologize
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In the eyes of someone who's unable to take accountability, everyone else is at fault. It doesn't matter if they started the argument or threw insult after insult. Due to their ego and inability to grow, they can't ever admit how they messed up, let alone say, "I'm sorry."
But this isn't all that surprising. According to clinical psychologist Daniel S. Lobel, "Some people find it painful to apologize because they have a weak sense of self and need to protect their self-image." Blame it on a fragile ego, but admitting you were wrong never feels good.
Even so, wholesome people don't have time for unevolved individuals, which is why they ignore their outbursts and move on with their lives instead. They understand enough to know that arguing with someone incapable of being open-minded is useless.
7. Speaking over others
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There's no greater annoyance in this world than speaking, only to be interrupted by someone. It doesn't matter if it's accidental, an interruption completely messes up a person's train of thought, not allowing them to get their point across. It's not only rude, but is one of the things that instantly annoy wholesome people with good values.
For some individuals, they always have to be right, which is why they're constantly trying to one-up others. Whether it's their partner or their co-worker, chronic interrupters don't understand social cues. And not being great with social cues can lead to fewer friends and more loneliness, which can lead to depression and other mental health problems.
8. Playing the victim
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There are times in which people are rightfully the victim. From being cheated on to being disrespected, people have the right to stand up for themselves. With that being said, there are manipulative people out there who use the victim mentality to their advantage.
Knowing that others will side with them and pity them, they twist a situation in their favor, making others look bad. And while there are true victims out there, there are also plenty of people who lie to get what they want.
According to psychotherapist Erin Leonard, "A person who is playing the victim tends to be attention-seeking, inflict guilt to manipulate, and use a past hardship to escape accountability in a current relationship." Since wholesome people have such giving hearts, they don't want to accidentally give their sympathies to someone who doesn't even deserve it.
9. Littering
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Not only is littering illegal, but it truly makes the planet a worse place. Multiple studies have shown that littering can actively cause harm to wildlife, and people should know better than to disregard their environment.
Wholesome people are not only considerate by nature, they love animals and, by extension, hate littering or doing anything to make the planet a less inhabitable place. If someone litters around a person with good values, they might not say anything, but believe they're deleting your contact number as soon as they get home.
10. Expecting kindness without reciprocity
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Whether it's because it's their inner people-pleasing voice taunting them or from their upbringing, people-pleasers hate being rude to anyone. Their kindness is often mistaken as weakness, which instantly annoys wholesome people with good values.
Even wholesome people get tired of being taken advantage of. From friends demanding the world from them to family taking advantage of their labor, evolved people have stopped allowing their kindness to be taken for granted without a little bit of reciprocity.
11. Making every conversation about themselves
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Wholesome people with good values love to cater to others and make people happy. However, just because they love to do this doesn't mean they don't get tired of it. If all someone does is talk about themselves and their problems, it's no wonder people get annoyed.
Like clockwork, people assume they don't have their own problems or things going on, which is why they unintentionally neglect their needs in favor of their own. But during moments like these, it's important for wholesome people to voice their opinion. Letting people know how you feel allows them to correct their behavior, leading to better conversation and connection.
Marielisa Reyes is a writer with a bachelor's degree in psychology who covers self-help, relationships, career, family, and astrology topics.
