5 Things Genuinely Confident Women Stop Doing After 30, According To Psychology
Truly confident women have learned not to waste time on this stuff anymore.
Jan Korpiva | Unsplash I think that most self-assured women would say that being in a great relationship is a priority in their lives, and yet many women struggle with the skills necessary to maintain such a relationship, especially after thirty.
There are 5 key skills that all genuinely confident women need to master, skills that will allow them to have great and healthy relationships and succeed in other areas of their lives at any age.
Here are 5 things genuinely confident women stop doing after thirty, according to psychology:
1. Neglecting themselves
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This is the most basic skill that a genuinely confident woman must possess to be in the best relationship. Because if a woman doesn't have a good relationship with herself, she will never be able to have a good relationship with others.
Women who don’t believe in themselves look to others to ‘complete them.’ They aren't confident in their ability to make their way in the world alone and think that without a mate, they will never be able to do so.
This lack of self-confidence puts an incredible amount of pressure on a partner to expect them to carry the one they love. Most people are working hard to carry themselves through life, and having to carry another is a burden that is often too much to bear.
And the relationship fails. So work hard to believe in yourself. Have your own life and friends, and a job that feeds your soul and your self-confidence. Carry your weight in the world, and you will be a good partner in a relationship.
2. Miscommunicating
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Communication is essential in every relationship. Without it, a relationship is doomed. Being able to talk to your partner about everything — both the good and the bad — is a key skill to have in every good relationship. If you can't tell your partner that you love them or appreciate them, then you won’t be able to reach the closeness that you desire.
And if you can’t tell your partner that they have hurt you or that you are angry with them and, instead, internalize your emotions, then your relationship will fail. So work hard at developing good communication skills.
Make an effort to verbalize your feelings, both good and bad. Tell your partner that you love them every day. Make sure that if something is amiss, you talk about it before it grows into something big and destructive. You will be glad you did.
Research shows that effective communication is a cornerstone of strong, supportive relationships, allowing women to express needs and emotions, build trust, and develop intimacy. Honing communication skills, including active listening and empathy, helps women navigate conflicts constructively, leading to better outcomes and reduced relationship stress.
3. Falling into codependent patterns
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Maybe women struggle with being alone. Alone in their home, alone out in the world, alone. A key part of being in a good relationship is the ability to be happy alone. Once again, the need to rely on someone else for your happiness and ease can be very destructive in a relationship.
If at any time your partner needs to do something without you, you get clingy and needy, so you push your partner away. Make an effort to learn how to be alone.
Develop hobbies that you can do when your partner is away. Make plans with friends. Don’t rely on your partner to keep you feeling happy and secure. Because if you don’t do so, you will find yourself alone, permanently.
Independence empowers women to take control of their lives, make their own decisions in areas like careers, relationships, and lifestyle choices, rather than being confined by external pressures or traditional gender roles. Research has concluded that through self-reliance, women develop a stronger sense of self-awareness and self-assurance, fostering confidence in their abilities and judgment.
4. Avoiding hard conversations
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For whatever reason, many women struggle with being able to talk about intimacy. Being intimate is a very important part of a good relationship.
What do I mean by the ability to talk about intimacy? I mean the ability to communicate with your partner how you feel about the physical part of your relationship. If you are struggling with some aspect of it or particularly enjoy another.
Intimacy issues can wreak havoc in a good relationship, and if partners aren't honest about how they are feeling, the issues will snowball. On the other hand, the ability to talk about the good parts of your intimate life can only make it better.
Learning to communicate openly about intimacy can empower women to cultivate stronger, more satisfying relationships and promote their overall physical and emotional well-being. A 2024 study found that this involves overcoming societal pressures and personal anxieties and developing effective communication skills.
5. Lying
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No relationship of any kind can survive without honesty. Why? Because honesty is the basis of trust, and without trust, a relationship simply can’t succeed.
You must be honest with your partner about everything, from the small and inconsequential to the very important, scary stuff. If you don’t like the way he slurps his coffee to the point that you don’t want to drink coffee with him, tell him. If you don’t like that, you have to spend every Sunday morning with his parents, tell him.
Because if you are honest with your partner, you can work together to resolve an issue. If you don’t tell the truth, then the issue will be left to fester and the relationship will founder.
So tell the truth. Let your partner know that they can rely on you, to be honest with them about issues in your relationship. And if you do, they will respond in kind. And you will live happily ever after!
Being in a good relationship is a wonderful thing and something attainable for every woman. Work every day to develop and perfect the skills necessary to keep your relationship healthy and strong.
Believe in yourself, talk about your feelings, be okay with being alone, talk about intimacy, and always be honest. These skills will get you far in your relationship and your life. And how great will that be?
Mitzi Bockmann is a NYC-based Certified Life Coach who works with individuals who strive to heal their toxic relationships so they can have their happily ever after. Mitzi's bylines have appeared in The Good Men Project, MSN, PopSugar, Prevention, Huffington Post, Psych Central, among many others.
