11 Specific Phrases Losers Use To Try To Humble Highly Intelligent People
fizkes | Shutterstock Many people operate with a kind of “intellectual arrogance” that prompts overconfidence. Not only are these individuals often more inaccurate and less skilled than they pretend to be, but they also actively shut down and dismiss truly intelligent individuals who interact in more quiet, intentional ways.
In conversations, it’s often easy to tell these two groups of people apart when you know what to look for. For example, there are specific phrases losers use to try to humble highly intelligent people. These individuals pretend to be smart without putting effort into learning anything, which speaks for itself.
Here are 11 specific phrases losers use to try to humble highly intelligent people
1. ‘You’re wrong’
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Even though correcting people in public settings often makes people defensive and makes conversations more productive, someone who’s trying to seem smarter than everyone else needs to feel correct. A truly intelligent person prefers to have more open-minded conversations, where nobody is inherently right or wrong, but overconfident people do the exact opposite.
You’ll often hear phrases like “you’re wrong” or “that’s not the right way to do it” from them because they cling to the control of shaping conversations with their own opinions and beliefs. Even if they can learn more from debating and occasionally changing their minds when someone else brings up a good point, they prefer to feed into their arrogance by dismissing and invalidating everyone else’s thoughts.
2. ‘I’m actually going to achieve that’
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To seek external validation and praise from other people, most overconfident people can’t help but brag about their goals and future achievements, usually before they’ve actually made any progress. Not only does this tend to come across as arrogant in conversations, but it also sabotages their motivation to chase after goals.
When they’re only really looking for approval and praise from other people, instead of internal pride, chasing after goals doesn’t actually make much sense when they’ve already bragged about things they haven’t accomplished. They want other people to feel small and unimportant, so their goals come before celebrating or making space for anyone else.
3. ‘You probably don’t know what that means’
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As a study from Frontiers in Psychology explains, many overconfident people consistently overpromise and underdeliver because they can’t help but inflate their self-image with things like overcomplicated language, words they don’t understand, and an inflated sense of superiority.
“You probably don’t know what that means” is a condescending way for them to assert that weird dominance in conversations, even though their intelligent counterparts are actually promoting better conversations by leveraging simplicity. They understand big words and know how to accurately use complicated language, but for the sake of inclusion and understanding for everyone, they prefer to simplify complex topics and use approachable language.
Of course, a loser isn’t interested in this, both because it takes more work to make things more accessible, and because they actually have no idea what they’re talking about themselves.
4. ‘Why are you so quiet?’
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Part of the reason why introverted people and high-IQ individuals are misunderstood in society is because of their tendency toward quietness. However, it’s not a bad thing, considering it offers space for deeper thinking, reflection, and regulation. They just live in a culture that prefers to reward extroversion and loudness at the expense of learning.
Even though their quietness is admirable in a culture of overstimulation and constant noise, it’s something that overconfident losers latch onto to weaponize embarrassment to wield control. They can’t handle the stillness and mindful quiet high-IQ people need, so they’re projecting with awkwardness and shame that does a lot of damage to productivity in social interactions.
5. ‘I won’t change my mind’
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Intelligent people are always learning and sharing new ideas with people they meet, because their main focus is entertaining their own curiosity. It’s an integral part of their cognitive skills and personality, but it also adds value to their lives in unique ways. They’re not afraid to change their minds when met with new information and to lean into the challenge of conversations with people who don’t agree with them.
However, losers who rely on overconfidence to seem smarter than everyone are far more rigid and close-minded. They refuse to change their mind, even when it’s apparent that they’re entirely wrong, because their self-image and self-worth come solely from being correct.
6. ‘I don’t have time for this’
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Licensed psychologist Sarah Rasmi agrees that busyness can often be perceived as importance to the untrained eye. The busier someone is, the more admirably we think of them when they make time for us. However, most of the time, someone clinging to a perpetually busy lifestyle and bringing it up all the time is leveraging it to cope with their own insecurities.
They’re not internally grounded or gratified, but instead rely on others' praise to feel secure. That’s why you’ll often hear an overconfident person talk about how busy and stressed they are, instead of making changes to manage their workload more effectively. Especially around people they know are more intelligent than they are, they’ll use “I don’t have time for this” to weaponize it for invalidation.
7. ‘It’s obvious you don’t understand this’
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Many incredibly insecure people with fragile egos are more defensive, getting irritable and hostile at the drop of a hat when they’re not getting external praise and attention. Even feedback and differing ideas can feel like a personal attack when they need to be the smartest or most correct person in the room.
“It’s obvious you don’t understand this” is just an ego-centric phrase that an overconfident person only uses when they feel threatened by someone else’s knowledge. They need to be the person everyone turns to, and more importantly, the person they envy and admire, or their self-worth plummets.
8. ‘I already tried that’
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Both a humblebrag and a dismissive tactic, you may notice that a loser only gets defensive with phrases like “I already tried that” or “this isn’t going to work” when they’re around someone who’s clearly smarter than they are. Instead of taking the chance to lean into discomfort for growth or to learn from someone who has knowledge they don’t have, they go inward and start projecting all their hostile feelings.
This close-mindedness, according to a Frontiers in Psychology study, is rooted in a high need for control and closure. They don’t have the emotional intelligence to regulate or learn, so they cling to their beliefs, even when they’re wrong, to feel secure.
9. ‘It’s not that complicated’
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Whether they’re talking about emotions or discussing something at work, overconfident people often defend their narratives and ideas harshly when they don’t understand what’s going on. They can’t simply ask for help because they view not knowing something as a weakness.
They refuse to learn from people because they have a fragile ego, so “it’s not that complicated” comes out of their mouths often. Their ignorance is a perpetual cycle fueled by shame because they struggle to simply say things like “I don’t understand.”
10. ‘I’ve done that before’
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From a need to seem superior around others to deep-rooted insecurities and social conditioning, many overconfident people one-up others in conversations, according to a study from the University of Phoenix, even when they have to lie to do it. “I’ve done that before” or “I actually accomplished that a few years ago” are the only tools these losers have to combat a truly intelligent person, even if it sabotages the productivity of a conversation entirely.
They’re not interested in celebrating or making space for anyone else, because their need for validation and praise is all they have.
11. ‘If that’s true…’
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Instead of trusting people’s beliefs and thoughts in the same ways they expect other people to trust their own, losers always second-guess truly intelligent people as a means of social invalidation. They always assume that someone’s speaking through ignorance, usually because they’re projecting their own insecurities.
“If that’s true” or “I’m not sure you’re right” all come from a place of insecurity, even if they are delivered with a hyper-confident, loud, demanding tone of voice.
Zayda Slabbekoorn is a senior editorial strategist with a bachelor’s degree in social relations & policy and gender studies who focuses on psychology, relationships, self-help, and human interest stories.
