15 Signs The Two Of You Are Simply Meant To Be Together
Your connection is like no other, and your relationship is just... easy.
Dean Drobot | Shutterstock Even when you're crazy in love with someone, it can be difficult to know if they are "the one." Deciding if you can commit to someone is a deeply personal determination, and everyone has different criteria. But a relationship that's meant to be doesn't mean it will be completely effortless. All relationships require hard work, because love isn't easy — it's hard and messy, and sometimes you end up crying with a pint of ice cream.
But there are times when you find someone who is willing to help you put the pieces together, someone who seems to be the thing you've been looking for. You may not notice the signs the two of you are simply meant to be together at first, but if you notice these qualities in your own relationship, they are the real deal.
Here are 15 signs the two of you are simply meant to be together
1. You tell them things you don't tell anyone else
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When you've found someone you're meant to be with, you don't hide your true self from them. Instead, you share with them your innermost thoughts, feelings, and aspirations. You're filled with the desire to tell them intimate details about your life, which means you trust them wholly. Because a relationship without trust indicates you likely don't belong together.
According to one study published in Frontiers in Psychology, "Trust plays a pivotal role in maintaining functional and fulfilling romantic relationships, deepening intimacy, and providing continuity. Lack of trust can lead to negative reactions, lying, low relationship quality perception, and attachment anxiety, negatively impacting relationships. On the other hand, trust positively affects relationship satisfaction in close romantic relationships."
2. You let them see you in moments of weakness
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It's easy to be happy with someone when you're feeling good about life. But what about when you're not doing so well? Do you want to see them when you've been denied a raise, your bank account is low, or you had a bad day? Your partner should be a comfort during tough times, not a burden. And one of the most glaring signs the two of you are simply meant to be together is that you don't need to hide your true emotions when you're feeling down.
Instead, you open up to them, letting them in on all the details of how you're feeling. Because they truly understand you, they listen intently without judgment or trying to offer solutions. When you're at your weakest, they make it their mission to lift you up and comfort you.
3. You respect them
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Without respect in a relationship, it can quickly fall apart. As marriage and family therapists Linda and Charlie Bloom explain, "Great and healthy relationships need high levels of respect on the part of both partners. For couples who are less intentional and accomplished in this area, their lack of respect holds the partnership down to lower levels of well-being."
In your relationship, you don't want to change the essence of who he is. There may be stuff your partner does that irritates you in everyday life, like eating sugar cereal for dinner, not loading the dishwasher properly, or watching cartoons on Saturday mornings. But you love and respect them, so it's something you can brush off.
4. You want them to meet your parents
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When people begin relationships, they often are hesitant to introduce their parents to their new partner. They may agonize over an initial meeting, thinking about everything that could go wrong. But for you, because you and your partner are truly meant to be, you have the opposite feeling.
You feel incredibly proud of who your partner is and you want to show them off, as opposed to feeling like you have to make excuses for them. Even if your parents aren't the kindest people or may not be welcoming, you're confident that your relationship is strong enough to withstand any judgment or criticism.
5. You can imagine a future together
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When couples have been together for a long time, they tend to plan for the future together. Do they want children? Are they going to purchase a home together? Will they get married? These are all questions you and your partner ask yourselves as well as one another before taking the next step in your relationship.
And while you won't necessarily have names picked out or a specific location in mind for a home, the point is that you see yourselves spending forever together. Your partner is part of all your future life plans, and you take into consideration how they feel about certain choices.
As psychotherapist and relationship expert Barton Goldsmith, PhD explained, "Futurizing with your mate is a healthy activity that will make you both happier, because as you look at the future, you'll be creating things to look forward to, and that's where happiness comes from... Making plans builds a bond and a stronger sense of security in our hearts. We all have dreams and desires that we want to share with the people we love, but if you don't talk about them and create a way to make them happen, you will just live life in your head."
6. You're not afraid to disagree with each other
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One of the glaring signs the two of you are simply meant to be together is how even when you disagree or fight, your partner will listen to you and won't brush you off. They take you seriously, even when they think you're wrong.
Psychic energy healer Elizabeth Hunter Diamond begs the question: "Does this person have a growth mindset in terms of relationship? Do they (and you) see the relationship as an opportunity to grow individually and as a couple? Because, no matter how blissful your courtship might be, there will be conflicts and challenges down the road."
Diamond continued, "Having a growth mindset means they're committed to working together, infusing your interactions with curiosity and compassion, and deepening your intimacy. If they're willing to confront the messiness of life and relationship together from a growth mindset, your relationship is truly meant to be."
7. You want to work out your major differences
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If you do have crucial differences that will impact your future together — such as different opinions about religion, money, or something else — you want to work them out. A difference in opinion or belief isn't something you consider to be a deal-breaker; rather, you embrace your partner's opposing views. After all, opposites tend to attract, right?
No matter what you differ on, you believe that you can come to a reasonable conclusion that will satisfy both of you. As Ashleigh Slater, author of "Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage," put it, "Maybe he or she doesn't like to read much, and you love it. Your dream of sitting side-by-side on a park bench and reading isn't likely. Or maybe you love musical theatre, and he or she hates it. These are areas where it's OK to step back and say, 'We're different… and I can live with that. I'm going to let you be you.'"
8. You laugh together
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Laughter is one of life's simplest pleasures, and is essential to making relationships not only last, but become stronger in the process. Because laughter is a huge part of your relationship, it seems to make things easier with your partner, indicating that you're simply meant to be. But laughter isn't just good for relationships — it has incredible benefits on your mind and body as well.
Research from the Federation of American Societies for Experimental Biology determined that laughter reduces levels of the stress hormone cortisol and sharpens memory, especially in older individuals. Additionally, one study from Ohio University found that laughing when learning something new improves engagement.
9. You're incredibly, utterly, surprisingly attracted to them
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While physical chemistry is an undeniably important ingredient in a healthy relationship, attraction goes well beyond physical appearance. Sure, you may be attracted to their physique or facial features, but you're also drawn to their personality and the way their mind works. And because they have all these things rolled into one person, you can't get enough.
Research published in Frontiers in Psychology suggests that emotional attraction can determine whether or not a relationship is successful, concluding that couples without this emotional connection were more likely to end their relationship. Additional studies found that perceiving someone as physically attractive makes a person more open to finding them attractive in other ways as well.
10. You don't feel like you have to fill the space with chatter
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One of the more obvious signs the two of you are simply meant to be together is that you're both comfortable with a little bit of silence. Whether you're sitting on the couch watching television or in the kitchen cooking a meal together, you feel incredibly comfortable not having to fill the silence with words.
Instead, both you and your partner are perfectly fine letting the silence fill the air, as you both contemplate your tasks at hand or even ponder what's next in your relationship. The point is that you love each other so deeply that not speaking to each other all the time brings with it some peace.
11. You feel like yourself around them
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When you're with each other, you both feel free to be your true, authentic selves. You don't feel like you have to edit or hide your thoughts, adjust your beliefs to conform to theirs, or feel like you have to walk on eggshells around them. You're not anxious or self-conscious about what they may think. In fact, you're more yourself every day you spend with them.
Experts from Newport Institute explained that authenticity in a relationship is essential to mental health. "Authentic relationships begin when we reveal our true self to another person. That means being genuine and vulnerable in our communication and interactions," they revealed. "Maintaining authentic relationships isn't always easy. While we can't control others' actions, we can control how we react when we're triggered. In moments of feeling defensive, hurt, or abandoned, skills for managing emotional reactivity are key."
12. You need them the right amount
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When relationships become codependent, partners begin to enable bad behavior, relying on each other for a sense of identity. But because your relationship is healthy and you're simply meant to be together, you need them, but you're fully capable of taking care of your own needs. You have an identity outside of your relationship, and even when you long for them, it's a healthy amount. Some neediness is good, but too much breeds discontent.
As licensed psychotherapist Sherry Gaba explained, "In a healthy relationship, both people depend on each other. That mutual dependence makes both people in the relationship feel safe, and that sense of security nurtures their resourcefulness and resilience... In a codependent relationship, the two people involved surrender their independence and instead develop an unhealthy dependence on each other that doesn't allow either person to grow."
13. You don't feel jealous
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While research published in Psychiatry and Clinical Psychopharmacology found that 66% of women and 79% of men defined themselves as jealous, in your relationship, that couldn't be farther from the truth. You're comfortable with them going out with their friends without you needing to always tag along. You let each other have your own lives and hobbies. In short, you trust them enough to the point where you don't need to worry about their actions outside of your relationship.
Gal Szekely, director of The Couples Center, explained, "Jealousy is considered a necessary emotion because it preserves social bonds and motivates people to engage in behaviors that maintain essential relationships... Healthy jealousy is shown when the person is able to control their jealousy so that it doesn't morph into anger. It's considered healthy when you can communicate with your partner about why you feel jealous."
14. You feel like they make you a better person
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When you're around your partner, they make you feel smart, funny, attractive, creative, and like the best version of yourself. They encourage you to follow your dreams, lift you up when you're feeling down, and are your biggest supporter. Because of that, you feel like they bring out and complement the best parts of you.
With them by your side, you feel empowered to make yourself an even better person. You're more aware of the actions you take and the behaviors you exhibit, and you make it a point to continue evolving on a daily basis. You ditch your toxic patterns, are more clear about what you want in life, and tend to let things go rather than harp on them.
15. They just 'get' you
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Sometimes it's that easy in a relationship. You feel like they understand some essential part of you that you can't explain or articulate. You can be sitting in complete silence, look over, and know that your partner is the missing piece of the puzzle. It's a warm, comfortable feeling, and you feel incredibly lucky that this is the relationship you have.
Being in this relationship feels like a breeze. You feel understood, validated, and fully supported. You don't ever have to worry that they're judging you for your needs or emotions, and feel completely respected and trusted. And if that's not a major sign that you're simply meant to be, then what is?
Samantha Maffucci is a writer and editor for YourTango who has written hundreds of articles about relationships, trending news and entertainment, numerology, and astrology.
