5 Reasons You Should Treat Pre-Marital Counseling Like Your Pre-Wedding Workout Routine

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premarital counseling before your wedding
Love

Don't just prepare for your big day — prepare for your future, too.

So often we think of counseling as appropriate for when something is broken or in crisis. This is not the case with premarital counseling or coaching.

So, for starters, what is premarital counseling?

It may be classes you take with a few other couples, either through an organization that specializes in this or through a faith community. It may be a whole day or weekend retreat.

It may also be customized sessions spread out over a few months with just yourselves and a professional coach or therapist who will have you access resources, possibly complete assessments or read articles.

Whatever the format or philosophy, one of the key aims is to equip you with tools for highly effective dialogue and lasting relational intimacy.


RELATED: 5 Critical Q's To Answer Before Going To Couples Counseling


Premarital counseling is like a workout routine. Here are 5 reasons why:

1. Premarital counseling makes the relationship muscles you already have even stronger. 

Participating in premarital work is not about being taught basic things that you know nothing about. It is about working relationship muscles that you already have to make them more effective and stronger.

For example, you already listen to each other but, just like everyone else, you could get even better at listening to your partner.

2. Premarital counseling has short-term and long-term benefits for your relationship. 

Pre-marital classes and coaching will offer you immediate benefits — providing a safe and supportive environment to have important conversations, being exposed to resources and motivational material.

Perhaps even more importantly, premarital work helps you to establish healthy life-long patterns. Just like regularly working out, this work can prevent issues and problems later on in your lives together.

3. In premarital counseling, you have access to tools that help you workout more effectively.

Relationship power-tools and methods can simply make your relationship better.

Whether the topic is conflict, decision-making, or love languages, learning to use the right tools at the right time will make a huge difference in the strength and flexibility of your marriage.


RELATED: 6 Amazing Couples Therapy Exercises You Can Try At Home (And Skip The Therapist)


4. The strong relationship muscles you build in premarital counseling are less likely to get injured. 

It is inevitable that there will be stress on your marriage — both external and internal.

If you start intentionally building great habits and skills early in your relationship, they will sustain you through the rough times. Every relationship will have times of heavy-lifting.

5. Premarital counseling is a very effective de-stressor. 

The support of premarital coaching or counseling can be a huge help as you prepare for one of the most important, and possibly one of the more stressful times in your relationship.

Be it immediate family issues or simply the logistics of a wedding can bring a lot of stress. Professional support in creating effective strategies for your wedding is amazingly de-stressing!

As both an executive coach and a partnership coach, I can say with confidence that the skills you will learn in premarital work will serve you well in other relationships, including in your career.

A wedding can be hectic and you will be investing many resources on your big day. Please also invest resources into your marriage!


RELATED: 4 Big Signs Marriage Counseling Will Work (And Big 4 Signs It Won't)


Marilyn Orr, MA, CEC, PCC is a relationship coach with Luv Life Coaching, passionate about equipping couples with the tools for real and lasting intimacy. Is Luv Life Coaching an appropriate next step for you? Take their online questionnaire to find out.

This article was originally published at Luv Life Coaching Blog. Reprinted with permission from the author.

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