The Brutally Honest Love Advice Each Personality Type Needs To Hear

We could all use a little help when it comes to matters of the heart.

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Even the most confident of us need a little guidance now and then, especially in the romance department. We're not perfect, and no relationship ever will be, either. But that doesn't mean that we still can't work to improve our relationships and make them stronger!

You may be wondering just how you can go about doing this. Thankfully, knowing your personality type can be a huge help. The Myers Briggs personality test can lend us a hand in relationship matters (because we all need some advice once in awhile for our romantic endeavors). This is especially true if we just need to get real with ourselves and hear what it is that we really need to tweak in our love lives — no matter how blunt it may be.


So here's the brutally honest love advice you need to hear, according to your Myers Briggs personality type.


You've really got to loosen up when it comes to relationships. We appreciate your old-school, traditional approach to love, but you've got to have some fun, too! Relationships need excitement and spontaneity in addition to the stability and commitment that you offer your partners. A healthy partnership requires all of these qualities to grow and survive. So, if your partner wants to try something new, just go with it! Or better yet, surprise your love with a spur-of-the-moment date idea. 


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We all need some alone time, but you cherish yours too much. It's almost to the point of seeming like you'd rather be off somewhere doing something else than be with your partner. You prefer the fun part of a relationship to the more serious aspect of one, even going so far as to avoid any conversations regarding deeper issues with your partner. If you want it to last, you must open up to your partner and start giving them the full attention that they deserve or you may one day end up finding your solo adventures to be a lot lonelier than you thought they'd be.

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3. ISFJ​​



You have a lot of emotions, but you often have trouble expressing them. Your reserved nature holds you back from letting the one you love know how you truly feel about them and it ends up seeming like you've closed yourself off from wanting to have a relationship. Don't keep your feelings inside anymore and allow love to pass by you. Finding the courage to speak your mind when it comes to that special someone will make an incredible difference in your romantic life. 

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Please drop the extreme mysterious act. You may think that it makes you more appealing in the eyes of a potential romantic partner, but it really just comes off like you're hiding something. Let your guard down and let your partner in. They want to see who you really are, not a pretend mask you put up to hide behind. Besides, you can't expect to hold onto any relationship if you aren't willing to ever tell your partner anything about yourself.

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5. ENTP​​

This personality type loves to debate, argue, and do just about anything that involves talking — as long as they're the ones doing all the talking, that is. You really need to work on giving your partner a chance to voice their opinions, too. No, they're not always going to agree with you about everything, but that's a good thing! Give your partner the same opportunity to just sit and listen to them that they give to you. After all, getting a different opinion on something can be very eye-opening and shows your partner that you appreciate the way they think.

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The take-charge, assertive attitude of an ENTJ can border on being controlling and possessive. This is a detriment when it comes to your relationships. You have a hard time managing your more negative emotions and often let them get the better of you. You need to take some deep breaths and try to imagine how your partner feels when they see you so upset. If you're not willing to gain control over your negative emotions, then you won't be able to get anywhere in your love life.

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7. ENFP​​



There's nothing more exciting to you than the prospect of a romantic relationship and you're more than willing to put your whole self into it. The problem is that your enthusiasm often gets the better of you and your constant affection is smothering. You've got to just chill a little when it comes to love and stop trying so hard to please your romantic interests. If you continue to think that you must please someone so intensely in order for them to love you, then you'll never have a healthy, lasting relationship.

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This personality type is notorious for overthinking things. You spend too much time analyzing every little thing your partner says and planning what you should say to them. You also care way too much about what other people think of you and this gets in the way of not only your relationships, but other parts of your life, too. Don't let others dictate the way you think and feel or you'll never be able to live the life you truly want or find the love you've always dreamed of.

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9. INTJ​​

You're a logical thinker and prefer to always think with your head and rarely ever your heart. Due to this, INTJ's can have a hard time maintaining a relationship. You're caring and you crave a long-term relationship, but you often let your unrealistic expectations of what you think the ideal partnership should be like get in the way. Try to remember that no one and no relationship is perfect and be thankful when you've found a partner who's willing to accept your faults as you are willing to accept theirs. It goes both ways.

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10. INFJ

You're a hopeless romantic who believes in soulmates. Becoming captivated by your romantic notions is common for you in relationships. Your tendency to get caught up in a relationship causes more harm than good for your life. Don't ever sacrifice who you are for what you think the perfect partner to someone should be like. Don't let your romantic fantasies carry you away from what you really deserve.

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11. INTP

In romantic situations, you're shy and usually want your partner to take the lead. This is fine to a point, but not when you start sacrificing your own beliefs in order to make your SO happy. Don't let yourself become someone you aren't, just to satisfy someone else. No relationship is worth it. Just move on and learn from your previous mistakes.

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12. INFP

You're compassionate and eager when it comes to romance. However, you have a very creative and active imagination that tends to get blown away by your fantasies. You need to stop believing the fantasy over the reality. While there's nothing wrong with having high standards, it's also important to stay realistic with your relationship goals.

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13. ESFP​​



You're carefree and impulsive. This personality type is always looking for the next best thing, in their lives and in their relationships. You never think that anyone is fun enough or exciting enough for you, so you end up dropping relationships at the snap of a finger. Because of this, you only let yourself have casual relationships instead of the deeper connection you really desire to have.

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14. ESFJ

You're a social butterfly whose appearance and reputation are more important to you than anything else. The significance you tend to place on social status can get in the way of pursuing good relationships. Stop letting the emphasis you place on titles ruin your chances at finding real love.

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15. ESTP

You're the life of the party and you're always down to have a fun time. However, this also means that you get bored pretty easily and this gets in the way of having a stable relationship. You'd rather live in the moment than pine away for the future, which is fine in some circumstances but it's not doing you any favors where relationships are concerned. The truth here is that you've got to grow up at some point and realize that relationships aren't only fun and games or you'll most likely be stuck in a relationship rut for the rest of your life. If you want to find - and keep - a love that will last, then you need to be open to slowing down sometimes and talking about the more serious things with your partner.

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16. ESTJ​​



This type is responsible and hard-working, meaning that you're more than willing to put in the effort needed to make a relationship last. ESTJ's are very conventional people, who feel very uncomfortable in new, unfamiliar situations. If it means that you're able to stay in your comfort zone, then you're happy to never take any risks — especially when it comes to your love life. You tend to let the fear of anything different or unknown happening stand in the way of what you really want. But if you're never willing to take a risk, then you'll never know what (or who) you'll be missing out on. 

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Sloane Solomon is a professional writer and editor. She graduated from the University of Colorado with a Bachelors in English Writing. When she's not writing or editing, you can find her daydreaming in French about coffee, online shopping, travel, and baby animals.