Truly Empathetic People Love Doing These 11 Things Cold-Hearted People Find Challenging
Krakenimages.com | Shutterstock Empathy, according to a study from the American Journal of Nursing, is characterized by an individual's ability to balance self-awareness with a careful consideration of another person's feelings and emotions. Empathetic people actively help to make others feel heard and cared about, borrowing their feelings to really understand them and find common ground.
While being great at open communication and having a knack for connection are common traits of empaths, often shared by typical peers, truly empathetic people love doing certain things cold-hearted people find challenging. For people with empathy, vulnerability and compassion come naturally, whereas people lacking empathy can't really understand their actions.
Truly empathetic people love doing these 11 things cold-hearted people find challenging
1. Randomly connecting with strangers
Miljan Zivkovic | Shutterstock
Many empathetic people have a knack for connecting with others, oftentimes because they make space for people to feel heard and understood in ways that many don't experience, even in their closest relationships. As energy healer Christy Whitman explains, they have a welcoming energy in a way that draws people in, giving them a safe space to share.
Cold-hearted people, who tend to be stuck in their head or overly conscious of the opinions of others, struggle to make genuine connections like this. They're more self-involved, less approachable, and often less concerned with the emotions of others during conversations.
2. Being self-aware
Krakenimages.com | Shutterstock
According to a study from the journal Emotion, people who are empathetic tend to be far more intuitive and emotionally aware of the world around them than their typical peers. It's not just because they can read other people well, but because they invest time into themselves.
They're not just emotionally intelligent, making space for difficult emotions and introspection, they're also self-aware and willing to acknowledge their own place in various situations and settings. They're complex thinkers who put a great deal of intention and effort into their relationships — not just with other people, but with themselves.
3. Teaching others
Dragon Images | Shutterstock
Whether it's giving their children life skills or training their colleagues at work, truly empathetic people love doing these things cold-hearted people find challenging. Empathetic people make great teachers because they're amazing at making strong connections, and also have a knack for open communication, honesty, and, of course, being a role model for others to learn empathetic behaviors.
Especially in traditional classroom settings, empathetic teachers can be the role model many kids struggle to find in their early adulthood, helping to set them up for success in their connections and relationships down the road, even if their home environment isn't necessarily productive.
4. Actively listening
Standret | Shutterstock
According to a study from the Journal of Personal Selling & Sales Management, empathetic people are often better at listening to others, both on an intuitive level and a literal one. They're more attuned to the emotions and expressions of others, including the general vibe they're putting off, but they've also mastered the art of active listening.
For cold-hearted people, active listening is more of a nuisance than something they genuinely enjoy. Because they're extremely selfish, it's challenging for them to put their own needs aside and lend their ears to another person telling a story or sharing an experience.
5. Challenging prejudices and finding common ground with others
simona pilolla 2 | Shutterstock
Empathetic people are genuinely better at reading a person's true character, rather than subjectively labeling them based on stereotypical judgments or prejudices. They're more concerned about cultivating a connection, founded on the shared experience or identities that make them similar, not different.
The true core of our humanity is connection. If you can focus on making space for someone to feel heard and understood, you're going to be better at finding meaning in passing conversations and all your relationships.
6. Setting boundaries with negative people
PeopleImages | Shutterstock
Research presented by psychologist Sherrie Bourg Carter suggests that everyone is able to pick up on the emotions of other people around them, oftentimes to a point where it affects their own well-being. While cold-hearted people can deflect some of that energy or remain less affected by it, empathetic individuals are more attuned to respond to it.
Many compassionate people, who have made it a point in their lives to protect their own emotional health, have been forced to set clear boundaries and re-assert themselves with the people in their lives. They're more affected by negative energy and people in their inner circle, so they're forced to set those expectations early on as a means of self-preservation.
7. Unpacking and healing from difficult emotions
BAZA Production | Shutterstock
While it's important to recognize the toxicity of hyper-empathy, especially in response to a traumatic childhood experience or relationship, most empathetic people who have gone through therapy or healed from trauma boast better emotional intelligence in their daily lives. It's one of the many truly empathetic people love doing that cold-hearted people find challenging.
From navigating conflicts in relationships, to diving deeper into insecurities, to cultivating a better self-esteem throughout transitional life stages and experiences, empathetic individuals can use their self-awareness to set themselves up for success and truly find peace in their relationships with themselves.
8. Maintaining long-term friendships
oneinchpunch | Shutterstock
With the chaotic nature of everyday life, our ever-evolving nature as individuals, and the common trend for resentment to grow in the background of most relationships without constant communication, truly empathetic people have a gift for maintaining long-term friendships, despite all the struggles.
Without the romantic connection, attraction, and intimacy that sometimes fuels romantic relationships without constant communication, empathetic people hold great power in making platonic friends feel seen, loved, heard, and understood, even through transitional life stages, conflicts, and disagreements.
9. Spending time alone
PeopleImages | Shutterstock
Self-aware and empathetic people often cultivate healthy relationships with themselves, as they are able to pinpoint, recognize, and heal from their internal conflicts and difficult emotions before they become overpowering. They not only enjoy spending time alone, but they usually prioritize it. They're fully aware that it helps them to process, cope with, and grow from their everyday experiences, and gives them a chance to unwind.
While cold-hearted people tend to spend time alone due to their inability to maintain close connections and relationships, empathetic people do so in order to recharge their social and emotional batteries. Cold-hearted individuals don't necessarily understand the importance of alone time for their mental health; rather, it's because they're uncomfortable confronting the emotions.
10. Volunteering their time
Dragana Gordic | Shutterstock
Whether it's cleaning up their local parks or taking care of animals at the local shelter, truly empathetic people love doing these things cold-hearted people find challenging. These individuals are more likely to participate in volunteering activities, and do so as a result of their focus on improving the collective whole of the world.
Cold-hearted people are incredibly self-centered, and could never imagine doing things for others unless it benefits them personally. Volunteering, in itself, is a vulnerable thing for a person to do, and people like this tend to view emotions as weakness.
11. Expressing themselves creatively
Yavdat | Shutterstock
According to one study published in the Journal of Personality, cognitive empathy is linked to a person being more creative in their everyday life. As co-author of the study, Matthew Pelowski, explained, "People who identify as being more empathic not only tend to be more creative, but may be more productive with their creativity, too."
On the flip side, cold-hearted people tend to be more practical and unwilling to reveal their emotional side. They won't express their creativity, choosing instead to remain pragmatic and averse to imaginative activities and thinking outside the box.
Zayda Slabbekoorn is a senior editorial strategist with a bachelor's degree in social relations & policy and gender studies who focuses on psychology, relationships, self-help, and human interest stories.
