11 Unexpected Phrases Thoughtful People Use Without Even Realizing How Profound They Are
Sometimes their words are just what you need to hear.
GaudiLab / Shutterstock Sometimes it's really the simplest words that end up sticking with you long after a conversation has ended. It's not always the grand speeches and carefully executed advice that leave the biggest impact, but rather the casual phrases that a thoughtful person tends to drop without even realizing just how much weight is behind their words. Not only that, but these individuals often don't even realize just how much someone else needed to hear their words.
Whether they're going through a difficult time in life or need a pick-me-up, thoughtful people often have a way of saying things that feel quite ordinary but carry layers of meaning beneath that do a good job of uplifting those around them. When you're having a tough day, their remarks may not mean much to them, but for you, it might be precisely the thing you needed to hear to get back on your feet.
Here are 11 unexpected phrases thoughtful people use without even realizing how profound they are
1. 'Take your time'
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Hearing someone tell you to "take your time" might not feel like much. It's just them being polite or not wanting someone to feel rushed while they're being waited on. But when you actually stop and think about it, those three little words carry a lot more weight than they seem to.
"The truth is we have more control than we think and the issue is not the amount of time we have, but more our relationship with that time. Most of us have an adversarial relationship with time, feeling there’s never enough or we can’t catch up. But we are all capable of shifting the way we think and feel about time and the way we manage it," explained psychologist Samantha Stein.
In a world that's always wanting us to hurry up, be productive all the time, and hustle until we can't hustle anymore, hearing someone seem genuine about wanting you to take your time can make you feel like a weight has been lifted from your shoulders. It takes the pressure off and reminds you that life will still be here if you take a few extra minutes for yourself in whatever way that means. You can move at your own pace rather than racing against some invisible clock.
2. 'How are you, really?'
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While we most likely hear the question of "how are you doing?" almost every single day, there's something about a thoughtful person tacking on that "really?" at the end that somehow manages to hit a particular chord. You can tell that they're not asking that question just because it's something you do when engaging in casual conversation with someone, but they're asking it because they genuinely want to know. It's an invitation for you to be sincere and show up as your most vulnerable self because they won't judge you at all for it.
"Of course, vulnerability must be earned. Not every relationship is a safe container for our tenderest parts. But over time, with support and reflection, we can begin to recognize when we are operating from old fears—and make space for something new. Vulnerability becomes less like a threat and more like a gesture of care," encouraged psychotherapist Santiago Delboy.
Most of the time when we're presented with the question, it feels robotic just to say fine. Still, when someone's actually asking how you're doing, it actually means you can take a moment to pause and really articulate what's going on inside. The person asking cares enough to listen, and they're not expecting some rehearsed answer at all, but they're actually giving you space to express the joys and struggles you might be going through.
3. 'That must've been hard for you'
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When said with sincerity, which thoughtful individuals always do, hearing your experience validated ends up meaning quite a lot. It shows that they're able to recognize your struggle without trying to minimize it or compare it to their own experience. Sometimes, just having someone acknowledge the pain you've gone through is more comforting than any solution you could've heard instead.
"We are neighbors and part of a larger community. We all experience joy, fear, and sadness. We all have wants, needs, and hopes for the future. But life can bring tragedy and pain, and it is important we stand and hold space for one another," insisted board-certified neurologist Ilene S. Ruhoy.
Hearing someone tell you "that must've been hard" allows you to sit in your feelings and know that they're okay to feel, especially with everything you might've gone through. That person cares enough to not only notice your experience but acknowledge it out loud, which can feel like a breath of fresh air if other people around you are tiptoeing and refusing to talk about it with you. Having someone show empathy in that way feels more profound than others may realize.
4. 'I'm listening'
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Many of us often engage in conversation with other people and can tell they're just listening on a surface level. But there's something about thoughtful individuals making it a point to let you know that they're actively listening that leaves you feeling incredibly seen and heard. It's their way of showing you that they're here to listen to whatever you need to say, especially if it's something that matters heavily to you.
"Being a truly effective listener takes effort and life experience. It requires patience and dedication to wanting to help others. Most importantly, the listener must set aside their own wants and needs and be present so as to fully and genuinely listen to the speaker," pointed out psychologists Shoba Sreenivasan and Linda E. Weinberger.
Rather than looking at their phone or waiting for their turn to speak, these individuals possess a rare but genuine ability to listen when others most need them to. It's their invitation for you to share honestly, even if it's something that you might be scared to say out loud. They would rather you get it off your chest than hold it in because they know that holding things in will only make it worse. If you need a listening ear, they are there to be that for you, no questions asked.
5. 'I'm glad you're here'
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This phrase, said by a thoughtful and sincere person, can leave you feeling quite warm inside. They're actively communicating to you that your presence matters, not for what you might be doing or achieving, but for simply being you. In a time when many people may feel the need to earn the approval and attention of others, being able to hear this phrase just for existing can feel incredibly validating. You don't need to perform or work hard to impress them because they are excited to see you.
"Although our sense of self is deeply internal, it gains much of its strength and manifests its problems socially. What is missing for many of us is a stable community of people with whom we have some kind of connection such as a shared experience. Family, friends, neighbors, coworkers, and the people we meet throughout the day can form these connections anywhere from casually to deeply lifelong," encouraged psychiatrist Mark Rego.
Your presence and just showing up are enough. Those who struggle with feeling seen or appreciated often find that hearing this is just what they needed in that moment. It's the kind of phrase that helps nurture community and brings people together. You don't need to bend over backwards for the right people. There are those out there who are able to recognize you for who you are, not who you work hard to be.
6. 'You don't have to be perfect for me to care'
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This phrase can be incredibly reassuring, especially for people who struggle not to let their mistakes and flaws define them. Often, people put a lot of pressure on themselves based on what they think is expected of them. So, when a thoughtful person takes the time to remind you that you don't have to be perfect for them to care about you, it allows you to learn that there are people out there who will accept you without conditions attached.
It's such a comforting realization to know that you don't have to be perfect for anyone to care about you. Living under the constant pressure to meet standards that seem unattainable can be quite draining, but hearing those words and being able to shake that burden means you're able to drop that mask. You can just be your most authentic self without fear of others judging you.
7. 'Your silence is okay too'
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If you're someone who struggles with the urge to always explain or justify yourself, hearing that it's fine to be silent can mean a whole lot. Not every thought or feeling needs to be shared immediately, and when thoughtful individuals remind you of that, it can feel like a weight has been lifted from your shoulders. They allow you the time you need to process anything without feeling the need to process at their pace just to adhere to their comfort level.
Some people are the type who stay quiet because they're feeling overwhelmed or just unsure how to articulate what's going on inside their brains. This phrase shows them that it's more than okay to be in this moment of silent reflection, and it doesn't mean there's anything wrong with them at all. Everyone processes things at a different rate, and each way should be respected.
8. 'You're safe here'
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It's more than just a statement about your physical safety, but a declaration from a thoughtful person that it's fine to lower your guard and just be yourself. For people who may have existed in spaces that made them feel unsafe and judged, hearing these words can send a bit of relief down their spine. Individuals who say this phrase want the other person to feel that being vulnerable isn't something they have to hide in their presence.
Every version of them is welcome. Thoughtful people are showing that they notice your needs and respect your boundaries. When someone repeatedly hears that they're more than safe with someone, it can help rebuild the connection that they might not have been able to get with anyone else. In a time where we need community more than ever, knowing that you can be your most authentic self with someone can feel refreshing.
9. 'You're not the only one'
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This phrase can help remind people that their feelings and struggles are often a shared experience that others have gone through as well. It can feel isolating to go through a challenging time and believe that no one else will understand what's happening to you, which is why it can feel quite assuring to hear a thoughtful individual remind you that you're not alone. You're also not the first person to experience that kind of turmoil.
It means they see you and see your struggle for what it is. Rather than comparing the struggles or trying to give advice that wasn't asked for, this phrase can help validate the fact that others have walked this same path. Not only that, but they've come out on the other side of it as well. It might hurt in the moment, but seeing that others who have experienced this can still be happy can give someone who's struggling that much more hope.
10. 'You're not behind'
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It can sometimes it can feel as if you're racing through life just to keep up with other people. With social media and comparison culture, it can be hard to remember that everyone's path is their own and there's no rush to achieve the things you want to achieve. When a thoughtful person gently reminds someone of this by using this phrase, it can help someone take a moment to breathe and move at their own pace.
"Slowness isn’t so compatible with modern life, with all its pressures and demands. But we all have a degree of control over how we respond to situations, particularly in our leisure time. We can choose not to rush. We can choose to slow down when we walk, cook, do our chores, and so on," explained psychologist Steve Taylor.
These individuals are trying to remind you that progress is not linear in the slightest and sometimes it's okay to take some detours or pauses along the way. No one will judge you for it, and in fact, it might be the thing you need to find happiness and joy in the small moments. Life is not a competition at all, and your worth should never be determined by how fast you're going.
11. 'This won't last forever'
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In a moment of strife, it can feel as if it'll last forever. When thoughtful people take the moment to sincerely remind you that life's toughest moments only exist for a short amount of time and won't be here forever, it can feel like a weight has been lifted from your shoulders. With how overwhelming or painful a situation can feel, it's hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel.
But change exists and will eventually come. Time will continue to move forward, and so will you. Even the hardest moments in life will eventually shift in your favor again. These individuals are not trying to get you to move on, but rather reminding you that you won't be stuck in this moment forever, no matter how bad it may feel at the time.
Nia Tipton is a staff writer with a bachelor's degree in creative writing and journalism who covers news and lifestyle topics that focus on psychology, relationships, and the human experience.
