Couples Who Always Have Each Other's Backs Do These 11 Things Better Than Everyone Else
Couples who have each other's backs take care of one another without thinking about it.
Miljan Zivkovic / Shutterstock Strong couples are a dime a dozen. With a 50% divorce rate, it can seem like most couples just can’t make it. There are couples out there who are destined not to be on the negative side of that statistic. These couples do things much better than everyone else, and they may not realize it.
“The best relationships are fortified with as much respect as romance and rely on more grit than glamor. It takes strength to survive. In the end, survival is both the foundation for and outcome of true love. Love without longevity is simply longing,” says Mark Verber, MS, LPC, of Epic Counseling Solutions. “There are certain things that strong couples do and don’t do. Ultimately, both love and strength come from these deliberate actions done consistently. In other words, couples rise or fall based on their habits.” When a couple excels in these areas, they are more likely to stay together for a long time.
Couples who always have each other's backs do these 11 things better than everyone else
1. They know how to listen
Dean Drobot via Canva
Have you been in a relationship where it felt like your partner was never listening to you? You could say the same things over and over again and never see a change in their behavior. It can feel impossible to navigate a relationship that feels one-sided.
When a couple always has each other’s backs, they have mastered the art of active listening. When one partner feels their needs aren’t being met, the other will listen closely and change their behavior. They are also active listeners. Sometimes, when something is going on in your life, you just want to vent. Men can take on problem-solving when not asked to. These couples who always have each other’s backs know how to listen properly and when to add commentary or solutions.
2. They’re honest with each other
kate_sept2004 from Getty Images Signature via Canva
Honesty means everything in a relationship. If you feel as though you can’t trust your partner, your relationship is doomed from the start. Couples who have faced moments of distrust struggle to repair their relationship more often than not. Not being able to trust your partner can lead to anxiety. When a couple has each other’s backs, their partnership is filled with trust.
“Honesty is what makes people open up and be their true selves without any walls or barriers. It allows us to be true to who we are. It also allows us to show others who we really are and where we’re going in life,” says Bianca Hughes of Authentically Be You Counseling and Wellness Center. “Honesty opens up a lot of avenues in our lives, especially when it comes to building strong, meaningful and long lasting relationships. Let’s indulge for a minute and take a closer look at the ways honesty can impact our lives and our relationships for the better.”
3. They have open conversations
Rido via Canva
Being able to talk to one another openly is important. This goes hand-in-hand with honesty. To truly trust one another, a couple needs to be able to have tough conversations. They never keep each other in the dark. They speak openly about what is going on in their lives. They never hide anything from their significant other.
Open conversations help prevent miscommunication. This helps prevent couples from having unnecessary arguments. Being able to talk to the other person about anything and everything can also help with bonding. Couples who truly have each other’s backs have open conversations with ease.
4. They resolve conflicts quickly
urbazon from Getty Images Signature via Canva
Although these couples are great at having open conversations and avoiding arguments more than those who do not, conflicts still occur. This is part of life. No matter how much a couple loves each other and works to have the best relationship they can, it’s still unrealistic to believe they will never fight with one another. The success of a couple who have each other’s backs comes in how they can clearly discuss and solve their issues.
“Successful couples have the ability to solve problems and let it go. They focus on taking care of the issue rather than attacking the person. Even when angry, they find ways to be upset and stay close at the same time. Once the matter is resolved, they forgive and forget,” says Preston Ni, M.S.B.A. “Most importantly, successful couples have the ability to learn and grow through their interpersonal difficulties. Like fine wine, their relationship improves with age and gets better over time.”
5. They always spend quality time together
Vera Arsic from Pexels via Canva
Spending quality time with your partner is important. Taking time out of our busy lives to prioritize our spouse feels good. It allows the couple to reconnect when life may be getting in the way of their relationship. These moments are thoughtful and special. Couples who always have each other’s backs love prioritizing quality time.
Sure, sometimes that looks like a fancy night out. However, that is not always the case. It can be as simple as talking after dinner instead of watching TV, or taking a walk and chatting while the sunsets. Life gets difficult, but these couples always make sure they take time for one another.
6. They’re always joking around
Aflo Images from アフロ（Aflo）via Canva
I don’t know about you, but humor is one of the most important aspects of a relationship for me. If my partner and I can’t have a good time together, it’s not going to work out. Couples who always have each other’s backs love laughing together. They know the importance of not taking everything so seriously. They bond over jokes and support each other with humor.
“Humor, irony, and an appreciation for the absurd are often overlooked by marriage scholars as mindsets conducive to success at love,” says Enrico Gnaulati for Psyche. “Yet I believe they provide the best way for intimate partners to adapt to all the mundane annoyances baked into marriage and long-term romantic partnerships.”
7. They have shared hobbies
Syda Productions via Canva
Of course, it’s important to have your own hobbies outside of your relationship. However, couples who always have each other’s backs love spending time together doing things they both enjoy. It can be hard to find time for yourself, your hobbies, and your relationship. When couples can bond over the same activities, it allows them not only to connect but also to take time outside the hustle and bustle of daily life.
Couples who have each other's backs know how to make the other person feel special without sacrificing their own needs. This is something they do better than everyone else. By finding a shared hobby or activity to do together, they are providing support and having fun.
8. They have routines and traditions
Syda Productions via Canva
Taking time to share a routine and traditions is something couples who support one another have down to a science. It could be as simple as one partner getting up and making coffee for you both while the other gets ready for work. It could be a good morning text if they leave for work earlier. They’re not always complicated. They know they don’t need a long, complicated routine to feel close to their partners.
They can also be more complex. The holidays can be a stressful time for everyone involved. Trying to please both of your families may be unrealistic. Couples who have each other’s backs develop traditions that keep them from becoming overwhelmed during these times of chaos.
9. They show gratitude
RichVintage from Getty Images Signature via Canva
Showing compassion and gratitude makes a major impact in relationships. Couples who always have each other’s backs know that acts of kindness and sweet words can go a long way. It’s the perfect way to make your partner feel appreciated and heard. All a supportive partner wants to do is let the other know how much their effort means to them.
“Scientific studies have proven that cultivating a mindset of noticing and appreciating the positives in our lives protects us from psychological distress. A 2010 systematic review found that “an attitude of gratitude” is linked to reduced incidence of depression, anxiety, and substance abuse; it has also been shown to help people adjust to traumatic life events and their aftermaths. A more recent review found strong evidence that a grateful outlook is tied to emotional and social well-being,” says The Bronfenbrenner Center for Translational Research.
10. They share household work
Kampus Production from Pexels via Canva
Couples who struggle to share the load of housework have difficult relationships. One partner may feel like they are carrying all the weight of the household on their shoulders. When a couple truly has each other’s backs, they know an equal load of chores is important. It doesn’t lead to resentment, and they both want to make sure they feel like equals.
“Recent research indicates that couples who do chores together, rather than one person doing more chores or splitting the chores, have more emotional and physical intimacy. Doing chores alone can be lonely, while doing them together can be a time of fun, sharing, and affection, and it certainly makes the time go by faster when you are doing the dishes together rather than doing them alone,” says Dr. Margaret Paul. “Sharing chores may be especially important when you have children because it’s often hard to find time to get together to talk about your day or share your feelings with each other.”
11. They stand by each other
John Foxx from Photo Images via Canva
It can be hard for everyone to get along. Whether it’s friends who dislike your partner or family members who constantly butt heads with them, standing by your partner is important. It makes them feel safe and comforted. Couples who have each other’s backs never leave each other hanging in conflicts. They know the importance of backing their partner up when times get tough.
Not only do they stand by each other when problems occur outside of their relationship, but they also come together when things aren’t going smoothly in their personal lives. Couples who always have each other’s backs are known to stand by each other through the good and the bad. Life isn’t easy, but these couples know how to make it work through having one another’s backs.
Haley Van Horn is a freelance writer with a master’s degree in Humanities, living in Los Angeles. Her focus includes entertainment and lifestyle stories.
