Photo: Ekateryna Zubal / Shutterstock
Kindness will change the world, one person at a time.
By Mitzi Bockmann — Last updated on Jun 07, 2023
Today, more than ever, there is a need for us all to work harder at emulating the characteristics of kindness.
The trauma of living in the modern world with its rigid bipartisan animosities, the disappearance of civility and grace, the rise of mental illnesses, and the escalated reduction of personal connection due to social media makes it more important than ever before to make sure we know how to be kind.
But while many people may think that being "nice" is the same as kindness, it couldn't be more different. Because kindness isn't just how you act, it's how you carry yourself in your daily life.
What does it mean to be a kind person?
To be a kind person means consistently embodying certain qualities like compassion, generosity, empathy, and respect — not just for yourself, but for others.
Being a kind person involves demonstrating acts of goodwill and support to individuals and the community. Kind people care about the well-being of others and treat them with the utmost thoughtfulness and understanding.
Kindness isn't limited to specific actions or gestures; rather, it's a fundamental attitude and way of interacting with others.
While it may not seem that being kind can make a difference in another person's life, as a mindset it positively impacts individuals, communities, and society as a whole, fostering a sense of connection, empathy and harmony, and creating a world where people feel valued, understood and supported.
With everything that seems so terribly wrong, it's important that we are kind to the people around us, those we know and those we don’t. By acting kindly toward one another, we can make the world a little bit better of a place.
What qualities are markers of someone who is naturally kind? People with these specific qualities possess kindness character traits, truly understand the meaning of kindness and know how to be kind.
11 Characteristics Of Kind People
1. Kind people are self-compassionate.
People who are kind are usually self-compassionate. Someone who knows how to be kind to themselves is someone who is likely to behave kindly toward others as well.
Instead of mercilessly judging and criticizing themselves for their shortcomings, people with self-compassion are kind and understanding to themselves when confronted with personal failings. They understand that they are just a person in the world, working hard to be the best person they can be in spite of sometimes insurmountable odds.
Once a person can be truly aware of the humanness of themselves, they can more easily be kind to others because they know that other people have their own personal issues, needs and stories, and that they deserve our compassion.
2. Kind people are resilient.
People who are kind, more often than not, are people who have struggled with hardship themselves. They have gone through hell and back, and they've survived.
People who have suffered tend to be truly grateful for all they have, particularly the human connections that keep them afloat. People who have struggled are aware of the suffering of others because they have suffered themselves and are, as a result, kind to those who are currently in need.
We've all heard stories of people dealing with extreme adversity who, despite their own difficult circumstances, consistently reach out to help others in need. They are well aware that were it not for the kindness of strangers, they may not have made it to where they are in the world today, and they give back at every opportunity they get.
3. Kind people are present.
People who are kind are people who are consciously awake. People who are awake are living in the minute, paying attention to those around them and willing to recognize all that is good in the world.
How can someone whose head is down, focused on their phone, even notice when there is an opportunity to be kind? How can someone who is always looking ahead to what is next see when someone right in front of them could use their kindness, right now? How can we be willing to be kind if we are obsessed with things that are toxic?
How about you? When was the last time you looked up from your phone and noticed when someone needed your kindness? Do you look out for opportunities to be kind to those in need or do you keep your head down and ignore those who might use a helping hand? Stop. Pay attention. Be kind.
4. Kind people are generous.
People who are generous are most often so because they realize all of the gifts that they have in this world. They know how lucky they are and want to share their luck and love with others.
You know that person — the person who doesn’t have a lot of time to give but nevertheless spends four hours each week volunteering at the homeless shelter. That person could be using their time to watch TV or drink beer with friends, but instead they are being generous with their time so they can be kind to others.
That person knows that the best way for them to unwind is to be generous with their time in the service of others. By doing so, they feel better about themselves and make the world a better place.
5. Kind people are grateful.
People who are kind recognize their gifts and know how lucky they are to have the life they have. Because they are grateful, they are able to help people who are struggling see the good in the world, recognize the gifts in their own lives, and reach for the happiness they want.
They have a clear picture of what contentment looks like and can guide others towards that light.
People who take their life for granted, who seek adulation and material riches, who don’t recognize how lucky they are to have what they have, are people who aren’t likely to see the good in the world. They will struggle to be kind because the world is all about what is lacking. And because of that, they will never be happy.
Every day I wake up in my beautiful house, laugh at my silly dog and celebrate having found the love of my life. I know that I am supremely lucky, and it helps me be the truly kind and compassionate person I am, personally and professionally.
6. Kind people are honest.
People who are kind have the vital trait of honesty and truthfulness. They value truthfulness and transparency in interactions with others, and are always sincere in their own words and actions. They understand that honesty builds trust and fosters genuine connections.
Kind people speak the truth with tact and compassion, and consider the impact their words may have on others. By being honest, they demonstrate integrity and create an environment where others feel safe and valued. Their honesty stems from a genuine desire to build trust and maintain open communication with others.
7. Kind people are authentic.
Authenticity is a defining trait of kind individuals. Kind people embrace who they are fully, and encourage other people to do the same. Rather than put up a front, they don't pretend to be someone they are not, choosing instead to value sincerity and empathy.
Kind people are comfortable in their own skin, fostering a sense of acceptance and helping others feel valued for who they truly are. They openly celebrate how everyone is entirely unique and their own individuals, and therefore create a sense of belonging to those around them.
8. Kind people are respectful.
Whether it's in a romantic relationship, friendship, or familial bond, kind people treat others with respect, dignity, and never cross boundaries. They actively listen when people are talking, and are sure to hear the perspectives of all angles.
People who are kind understand that everyone should be treated with compassion, and outwardly express their respect for others through their words and behaviors. By being respectful, they prove that differences should be celebrated, not judged, and create peaceful environments.
9. Kind people are non-judgmental.
People who are kind are able to keep an open mind, no matter what they are doing or who they are engaging with. Because they truly understand that everyone is unique and has their own experiences and challenges, they refrain from making judgments.
Kind people are empathetic in nature and make it their mission to be accepting of the differences in opinion or perspective. They listen to what someone is saying without jumping to conclusions, effectively making other people feel welcome and accepted.
10. Kind people are optimistic.
When you maintain a positive outlook on life, refuse to see the bad in any situation or person, and are open to positive change and personal growth, you are a kind person. Kind people are incredibly optimistic, inspiring hope and motivating people around them with their positivity. Their sunny disposition uplifts others, especially during struggles or difficulties.
And while people who are kind tend to always be happy, that's not to say they don't have negative emotions from time to time. After all, they are human, too, and, like everyone else, may be filled with sadness or doubts from time to time. However, it's their underlying kindness and positivity that drive them forward.
11. Kind people are trustworthy.
People who are kind are incredibly trustworthy, whether it's keeping a secret from a friend, being reliable, or offering emotional support when someone is in need. They consistently follow through on promises and commitments, and are fully dependable at all times.
Kind people have a genuine and deep-rooted concern for others' well-being, which allows them to form relationships built on trust and security. This also means that other people feel comfortable confiding in and relying on them for support.
If you look around this world full of conflict and hatred and you are wondering what you can do, cultivating kindness is a gift both to yourself and to those around you.
The next time you see someone struggling, step forward and reach out your hand. Recognize that while suffering may be the human condition, within it there remains hope for joy and acceptance.
Be kind to everyone you encounter and make the world a better place along the way. If you can make the difference in the life of even one person, what a gift that will be!
More for You:
Mitzi Bockmann is an NYC-based Certified Life Coach and mental health advocate who works exclusively with women to help them be all they want to be. Mitzi's bylines have appeared in The Good Men Project, MSN, PopSugar, Prevention, Huffington Post, Psych Central, among many others.