How Talking To A Stranger Every Day Triples Your Chances Of Finding Love

Photo: getty
talk to strangers meet new people

It's time to open up a bit!

Are you a single woman looking for love but, feel like it's slim pickings and aren't having much luck?

Meeting men in the digital age should be easy with dating sites and apps. Maybe you talk to guys on social media or gather with friends at parties or bars. You may even flirt with men at work. These are the digital and traditional ways many singles find relationships.

However, there is another way to meet new people and find love that few women bother with. What is it?

RELATED: 3 Great Ways To Get A Guy's Attention IRL (If Online Dating Isn't Your Thing)

Well, this might take you by surprise because I'm recommending something a little unusual: I think you should talk to strangers. Yup, that’s right. If you're looking for love, talking to strangers is the way to go.

But what about the common warning, "Don't talk to strangers?"

Here's why you need to throw that advice out the window when you're looking for love: The more men you interact with, the more men you meet, and the better your chances of finding love with the right guy.

What could be easier? Almost anywhere you go, you'll meet new people to talk to. No need to qualify the men first — being flirty and friendly is a casual thing. You don't want to wait for the perfect guy to try this because, if you do, you won’t have a chance to improve your game. This sort of thing requires volume. The more men you talk to, the better your skills get

Who would've thought that talking to strangers would actually turn out to be a good thing!

Here are 4 suggestions for how you can find love, meet new people, and practice your social skills at the same time!

1. Learn how to talk to guys.

The simplest start is with a smile and your name. What to say varies based on the situation. You can comment on the band playing if you're at a bar, a man's tie, or the beer he’s drinking. At a party, you could ask a guy how he knows the host or which appetizer tastes best. These are no-brainer, one-line openers meant to get the conversation rolling.

Truth is, what you say doesn't matter. You are simply breaking the ice. The trick is to just say something and not get too attached to the outcome beyond a short chat. The point of talking to strangers is to meet new people without any long-term agenda. You may or may not hit it off and that's perfectly okay either way.

The goal is to mimic the (social) butterfly, fluttering around a room chatting with men. This draws attention to you, giving other men the opportunity to notice you. They'll check out your friendly manner and feel safe to approach. Men don't like to be rejected, so your friendly character becomes enticing.

2. Take the pressure off.

This move might not land you that handsome guy you noticed. Whoa, that's too much pressure to put on yourself or him! However, you can talk to him for a little while, then gracefully exit to find another prospect. Don't worry about how to extend the conversation or get him to ask you out. Trust me, if a man decides he’s interested in you, he'll come find you.

I realize this might sound like odd dating advice, telling you to talk to strangers. You don't know these men which pushes you out of your comfort zone. This method involves some social risk too, especially if you’re shy. According to Bernado J. Carducci, Ph.D, nearly half the population labels themselves as shy which is true for both genders.

Here's the thing – if you approach a shy guy, this method works to your advantage. When you strike up a conversation with a stranger, you're doing him a huge favor because he could be wishing someone else would start. Taking the lead to break the ice makes it easier for him to get past his own shyness and chat with you! The vast majority of men feel flattered and will happily respond to your opener.

3. Get out of your comfort zone.

Nothing much that's new or interesting happens in your comfort zone. As Mark Twain, the nineteenth-century American writer said, “Why not go out on a limb? That’s where the sweetest fruit is.” In other words, you'll be rewarded for this risk to strike up conversations since there are rewards for taking the initiative.

Talking to strangers from this perspective isn't such a far-fetched idea is it? You've probably spoken to strangers at a bar or party, right? You lived through it and maybe even enjoy the exchange. What I'm suggesting takes this friendly, flirty outreach a step further by making it a daily habit.

Can you imagine what your love life would be like if you committed to talking to one stranger every day? I put this approach to the test when I was single and found it to be highly productive. I met so many more men and stopped focusing my hopes on the one guy I met because suddenly, men seemed more abundant. And, I gained skills that helped me on first dates and in my business life, too.

RELATED: 17 Things You Can Do In Your Own Life (That Also Make You Irresistible To Men)

4. Reap added benefits.

Here's what happened for my dating coaching clients who applied this proven strategy. They've had amazing results and are so glad they challenged themselves to be the one to initiate things.

Check out this juicy list of benefits that come from talking to one new man every day. You will:

  • Get really good at starting conversations
  • Feel more comfortable around men
  • Not make a big deal out of every man you meet
  • Realize your prospects for love are far more abundant
  • Practice and enhance your flirting skills
  • Interact with men more easily
  • Build confidence for any social setting
  • Get over your shyness
  • Hone your feminine charm
  • Become a woman men notice
  • Learn to gracefully exit social situations
  • And, meet lots of men!

Nice list of benefits right?

Now, let me tell you an exciting success story. In her early 40s, Felicity was single and a professor at a University in Massachusetts. Concerned her advanced degree intimidated men, she was on the dating sites, but not meeting the right guy. She took one of my coaching programs and decided to take on the challenge — she committed to talking to one new man every day.

While she didn't always meet the quota, she talked to a lot more men. As a result, Felicity went through a massive, positive shift in her dating consciousness. In fact, she became optimistic about finding the right guy. She actually looked for and noticed men on a regular basis.

Before the challenge, she had been solely “task focused,” getting errands done but, taking little notice of what was going on around her. Her elevated consciousness helped her become aware of the opportunities her daily life provided.

After meeting over 80 men (not dating, just meeting them), Felicity saw a guy standing alone at a work-related cocktail party. Super comfortable at this point, she sauntered over and said hello. They had a nice conversation and he asked for her number. This is the man Felicity is now happily married to and she says she owes her success to my proven strategy — talking to one man every day.

What about you? Are you ready to give this a shot and talk to strangers? That's my hope for you. I guarantee following this advice will change your life for the better in many ways. If you're single and reading this, start talking to strangers and you'll take a big step closer to meeting the man of your dreams.

RELATED: 23 Classy Ways To Turn Down Guys You're Not Interested In (Nicely!)

Sign Up for the YourTango Newsletter

Let's make this a regular thing!

Ronnie Ann Ryan is a Dating Coach for Women over 40 who has helped successful single gals find love for over 15 years. Ready to stop wasting precious time on dating mistakes that keep you single? Get her Free book 7 Dire Dating Mistakes that Keep You Single.