Photo: getty
Your own type can help determine if it's a good match.
By Alison Cerri — Written on Jan 21, 2019
For some, it may be easy to fall head-first into a relationship with no fear or reservations as to what might happen. For others, it may seem impossible to do such a terrifying thing.
Your opinion on the matter may be an indication of your own personality type. The Myers Briggs test is often used in choosing a career, but can also have much to do with broader aspects of your personality and even falling in love.
You may know the positives and negatives of your own Myers Briggs personality type, but if you think love may be on the table for someone, you should consider what about his personality type is good for you, and what may not. For those with more analytical preferences, the best way to evaluate a potential partner is to dig deep into who he is — and determine whether he is someone you want to fall deeply in love with for a healthy, loving relationship.
ISTJ
This type, though quiet and reserved, is known for their dependability. You’ll know if he’s interested in you because he is dedicated to tradition. He’s the type to try and woo you with chocolates and roses.
Pros: He’s thorough, consistent, and loyal — what more could you want?
Cons: He can be detached because of his need for order and working through systems. Spontaneity, which helps spice up any relationship, may be completely out of the question.
ISTP
ISTPs are self-determined and confident, so despite being an introverted type, he may not be so shy in sharing his feelings for you. He is a great problem-solver and can be depended upon in case of a crisis.
Pros: ISTPs are known as egalitarians, so he’ll make sure you are treated fairly.
Cons: You won’t be able to tell what he’s thinking much of the time, due to his reserved nature. He also highly values his independence.
ESTP
Fun-loving and enthusiastic about life, ESTPs will make you fall in love with all the world has to offer, too. He loves to stay active and keep life fresh through spontaneity.
Pros: He’s flexible and good-humored. Seeing life through his eyes can be life-changing.
Cons: This type is not one for commitments—you’ll want to make sure that your relationship is one he wants to keep.
ESTJ
An ESTJ will tell you he loves you, likely through a grand gesture, when he knows it to be true. His decisive efficiency leads him to get done what needs to get done.
Pros: Communication is key to any relationship — this type is a master of communication.
Cons: ESTJs feel the need to be in control of everything, including relationships. They can also be impersonal, seeing your relationship as something more formal and business-like than a romantic partnership.
ISFJ
It may seem as though most men are not in touch with their feelings. ISFJs, however, is one of the most emotionally-attuned types. They are empathetic and love to help.
Pros: He will take care of you—ISFJs are devoted partners. They also have great attention to detail.
Cons: Unfortunately, his greatest strength is his greatest weakness: he tries to take care of everyone in his life.
ISFP
This type is gentle and caring and knows exactly what to do if you’re feeling down. He is also a grounding force that helps people see the reality of things.
Pros: He is exactly the type to give you flowers every so often. He shows his love not just through words, but through actions.
Cons: His dedication to his own freedom is likely to put a strain on your relationship if you don’t acknowledge it.
ESFP
ESFPs love companionship. They need someone to talk to about everything they encounter, and also do lots of fun things with.
Pros: Loving him will be an adventure in itself, and he will support you through it.
Cons: This type does not do well with restraints, such as commitment and routine. Don’t be surprised if he’s also not great with math, specifically financials.
ESFJ
This down-to-earth type revels in order and can be depended upon as a decision-maker. If he’s an ESFJ, he’s likely someone that’s very energetic but knows when to rein it in.
Pros: Above everything else, ESFJs want to help; he’ll want to help you be your best self.
Cons: He might seem a little clingy since he doesn’t do well with alone time.
INFJ
People that fall under this type can get a bad rap for being mysterious, but they understand relationships better than any other type. They can even seem like mind readers, as they can sense how those around them feel.
Pros: He’s a great motivator, and will encourage and support you in whatever you do.
Cons: He can be very private and hyper-focused on the ideal — it can be hard to get his head out of the clouds.
INFP
If you think you’re falling in love with an INFP, you should already have a close relationship with him, as this type is very selective about whom they share their thoughts and feelings with.
Pros: He’s a unique individual that can be a very devoted, caring partner.
Cons: Since he’s picky about relationships, he may try to pick and choose yours.
ENFP
ENFPs can come off as friendly and warm at their calmest. They are independent people but enjoy being with others and sharing their love of life.
Pros: He can inspire you to do things you couldn’t imagine yourself doing.
Cons: This type can come off as very intense. They cannot sit still and need constant stimulation.
ENFJ
This type is dedicated to others: they are their best selves when they are helping other people become their best. It’s no wonder you may be falling for an ENFJ.
Pros: This warm, compassionate, responsible type is an expert diplomat, which is ideal in any relationship
Cons: He may have issues managing his time, as he wants to help everyone in his life. This type is also known for being procrastinators.
INTJ
INTJs may seem low-key at first glance, since they’re not one for social conversations or activities. They are driven by logic and thus make very stable partners.
Pros: He can be your “rock.” You can also have a special relationship if you help him get in touch with his emotional side.
Cons: He can come off as distant, even robotic, quite often, due to his dedication to knowledge and logic.
INTP
There’s a reason why this type tends to be leaders: they need to be in charge. They tend to be very smart and original.
Pros: He will help you get in touch with your curious side, and will open your mind to all sorts of facts and ideas you hadn’t considered before.
Cons: His independence is extremely important to him. You also have to be mentally sharp nearly all the time around him.
ENTP
If he’s an ENTP, he’s definitely smart, and lets it be known—but not in a pretentious way. He loves to take charge and question the way things are said and done.
Pros: You’ll never be bored with him. He will challenge and encourage you to think outside the box.
Cons: He may be too challenging at times. You may find yourself in need of a break from his constant need for mental stimulation.
ENTJ
As a forward-thinking type, ENTJs have their eyes on the future most of the time. More specifically, they want to make the future into something they want along with others.
Pros: He will have the best intentions for you and the world around you in a relationship.
Cons: Intentions don’t always equal impact—he may fail to see how his actions can sometimes have negative consequences.
Alison Cerri is an editorial intern at YourTango. When she's not writing, she can be found on a run or at rugby practice. Follow her on Instagram.