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Go ahead, awaken her heart.
By Aria Gmitter — Written on Mar 23, 2021
When deciding what type of woman a man could choose to spend his life with, it's a no-brainer: He should choose a woman with a romantic side.
Deep down inside, a hopelessly romantic soul is hidden within every woman. But she's not going to let anyone see that side of her outside of context.
What is a hopeless romantic?
The Dictionary's definition of a hopeless romantic is "a person who holds sentimental and idealistic views on love, especially in spite of experience, evidence, or exhortations otherwise."
"A hopeless romantic," according to marriage and family therapist Frances Patton, "means she needs to feel loving feelings forever. She needs that in order to feel attached, close to, intimate with you. Once a commitment is made, some people stop making romantic gestures because they think the other person will be there no matter what. But not your hopelessly romantic woman — she wants to enjoy every thoughtful gesture, every romantic evening for the rest of your lives."
This means romance is something special to hopeless romantics. It's a gift. It's a gateway to their body and their mind, and everything else in between.
They talk about love on social media. They listen to love songs all the time. Love interests them to their core. Falling in love comes easily to them. They believe wholeheartedly in true love and love at first sight.
Love and relationships are priorities to them. Romance is something that doesn't just happen to them, it's something that releases from them. Romantic vibes only happen when all the pieces are connected.
One way to reveal the emotional aspects of a woman whose commitment runs deep is by dating her, but you also need to know the signals she gives that say there's more to see. Simple, and silly, it's a chase of the heart that's seriously necessary.
Don't dismiss this key truth about being with a romantic woman. At least, don't bother unless you want a woman who will stand by your side during the worst of times. It's in seeing the signals that she's expressing her love, then dating her that cultivates a woman's romantic side into the surface.
Romance is a relational spell caster to lasting love, for sure. It doesn't really matter if she's your high school sweetheart or if you've been married for 50 years; a woman of depth wants to know her man is in hot pursuit of her heart.
Loving a hopeless romantic isn't for the faint at heart. But if a man is up for an adventure of a lifetime, hopeless romantics will give you one.
What is a hopeful romantic and how is it different from a hopeless romantic?
Different from hopeless romantics, hopeful romantics are people who still believe in love and the quirky Hallmark cards, but still have practical expectations of it. These people are optimistic about love and are obsessed in their own way.
A hopeful romantic's love life is specific to each individual; their views differ from person to person.
Although there is a distinct difference between hopeful romantics vs. hopeless romantics, which is in how they approach love, they both adore the feeling; however, hopeful romantics aren't blind to what can go wrong in love.
Hopeless romantics view love as the storybook ending. It's not technically unique, per a hopeless romantic, but hopeless romantics idealize fairy tale love seen in story books, wanting Prince Charming to sweep them off their feet, and barely look at the ways love can be toxic, bad, or destructive.
Is it good to be a hopeless romantic?
According to a 2016 study published in the Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, high expectations combined with a good dose of romanticism is a benefit when in intimate relationships.
The study, conducted by Sarah Vannier, Ph.D., used 270 young adult couples and looked closely at each couple's romantic beliefs to the actual outcomes of their relationships. What they found surprised many.
"People with romantic beliefs did have higher expectations, but they were also more likely to see their partner as meeting those expectations," Vannier reported. “It is hard to say whether this is because they are seeing their partner through rose-colored glasses... For example, their beliefs about Prince Charming make them think their partner is Prince Charming, even if other people might think that he is a frog — or if this is because they found and chose a partner who meets their expectations.”
So, yes, being a hopeless romantic can be a good thing! But a man who wants to tap into the beautiful essence of a romantic woman has to know it's going to require putting in a little work. The effort is worth it when her sweet side comes out.
How do you know if you are a hopeless romantic?
If you idealize love, become happy at the idea of love, or have never changed your outlook on love even if you've had had bad experiences with it, you're a hopeless romantic.
There's even a 10-minute test you can take to find out if you're a hopeless romantic.
17 Signs Of A Hopelessly Romantic Woman
1. A romantic woman has one wish: to experience everything with her man.
She loves to fall in love over and over again. Sometimes, when she doesn't show her romantic side, it's because she secretly longs for her lover to bring that side of her out.
It makes perfect sense that the desire to be discovered would be found at the center of a truly deep woman, because at the core of a real man is the need to pursue and win over his woman's heart.
2. A romantic woman loves to spend quality time with you.
The less expensive the moment, the more meaningful the experience.
Just think: walks on the beach while holding hands. A hug during a sunset. A kiss on the forehead. Those cost nothing, but they reap a value money can never buy: love.
3. A woman who is completely hung up on the romance of life wants her sentimental side respected, but she also wants it cherished.
She's the one who remembers exactly how your mother made your favorite meal, or where you like your shoulders rubbed after a long, hard day. Her memory of these things are the ways she uses her love to reconnect with you.
Women are natural caregiver types, and knowing that her touch can have such an impact on her man makes her feel like a woman.
4. She might talk all day to coworkers and people she meets, but most of the time it's because she has to.
When she takes the time to talk to you, it's not like that — she's talking to you because she wants to. When a romantic woman with a tough exterior and professional power suit is a hopeless romantic, you'll know.
"When she talks to you, she loves it when you stop what you’re doing and listen to her heart. She opens up to you when you empathize with her feelings without judging them. And she will do the same for you," says Patton.
5. She'll text you 'I love you' during her most important meetings.
It brings her pleasure to know she's made you smile just by texting you a few words, and especially if she knows she got you a little distracted and turned you on.
6. A woman who is a hopeless romantic loves surprises.
If she knows she's appreciated for who she is by the way you treat her, she's likely to surprise you in bed and out. A romance not only triggers the emotional side of a woman, but it also brings out her wild side, too.
Want to see her in a t-shirt and nothing else? Romance that girl. Suddenly, you get more than you gave in return. She'll know how to reciprocate. If she knows that tickets to your favorite game is what will bring you closer, don't be surprised if that's what she's got planned.
7. She shows you support during hard times.
It takes a lot of love and courage to stand by your man when the going gets rough. Tough times rock the security of a woman.
Stress makes a woman forget that love is important, but a romantic woman will gladly remember that all you need is love when you show your appreciation for the things she does.
8. She understands that time is a limited resource, so she tries to make your life easier.
A woman who loves romance knows that life happens, but it's taking care of each other that matters most. With her hair up in a mess and the phone to her ear, she'll schedule appointments, car repairs, and even dinner to see your friends.
A deep woman isn't afraid to do unglamorous tasks, especially if her heart knows she's serving her loved ones and making sure they have their needs met.
9. She cherishes when you do things like chores or tucking the kids into bed.
"When you take even a small burden off of her shoulders, like taking out the trash, she feels cared for. She knows it was a sacrifice for you, especially if you’re busy, stressed, and tired," Patton says.
A hopelessly romantic woman adores watching her man do things that she would usually do herself, but you took the time to carry that burden.
"The reason why 'little things' mean the most to a woman who is a hopeless romantic is because it means that her partner truly cares about her," dating coach Joe Amoia adds. "Every woman wants to be valued and appreciated by her man, and it's these little signs that show her that her man truly loves her."
10. A woman who is a hopeless romantic remembers the things you forgot, and steps in to make sure you don't look silly for it.
If you forgot your mother's birthday, don't be surprised if she's the one who bought a card and sent a gift in the mail. If you're cranky when you've had too much caffeine and there's a business meeting in the morning, she will nag you not to take that second cup of coffee on your way out the door.
These tasks sometimes come across as mothering, but to a romantic woman, this is her way of saying you're her baby, her one and only, and the man she's happy to pamper with her love.
11. A hopelessly romantic woman will get along with people she doesn't even like to make your life easier.
You know that ex-girlfriend or wife of yours (who is the mother of your children) who always tries to start trouble? The reason she's nice to her all the time is because she knows that you're less stressed out because of it.
It's the depth of love that stirs a woman to do what she'd rather not. What she wants you to do when it's just the two of you again is take her to paradise and remind her why your relationship will always last.
12. When you mess up, she accepts your apologies and tucks away the blush your cheeks had when you said you were sorry.
As annoying and hurt as she may feel, she loves to hear an apology. She loves to know that she meant enough to you to make things better.
A romantic woman knows what it's like to swallow pride. The fact that you do means the world to her, even if she doesn't let you off the hook right away.
13. Her idea of a fancy date is anywhere you can have your legs and arms wrapped around each other, without speaking.
A hopelessly romantic woman loves physical touch as much as you do. Her idea of adventure is exploring each other's bodies and having permission to release her own desires.
14. She believes romance, hugs, and intimacy can fix any problem.
If you've ever wondered why good women end up with bad guys first and good guys last, the reason can be found in the way women are romanced in those relationships. A bad guy knows how to say the things she wants to hear, and often lands her with a broken promise and a wounded heart.
"The reason why a hopeless romantic believes romance, hugs, and intimacy can fix any problem is because she understands that these things are signs of a committed partner," Amoia suggests, "For a woman to be in a healthy and happy relationship, she must feel safe. She must know that her man is going to be there and protect her heart."
A romantic woman loves to hear how you make her feel, and when it's said in just the right way, she loves to wind up in bed to show you her appreciation.
15. A hopelessly romantic woman loves the fact that you have zero sense of fashion.
A man's flaws are the tiny quirks in his life that give her a place to fill. She knows she can do so much more in her life professionally, and she does.
But at the end of the day, it's those nuances of a secret and intimate relationship that bring the spark to life in a way that touches her heart. When she picks out your clothes or shops for your socks, you can be certain, her romantic side is showing.
16. If you have to break plans, she doesn't hold a grudge — but she does expect you to make it up with something better.
Things happen, but a truly romantic woman will let you make it up. Something rescheduled means an opportunity for more thoughtful planning, and she's up for it to be really sweet.
If you missed a dinner date and reschedule with a picnic on the beach at midnight, she won't complain much at all. But she may want you to pay with extra sweet kisses and a walk on the moonlit beach.
17. A romantic woman loves your wicked sense of humor and the way your mind works, especially when it's thinking of her.
What's really sweet to a woman who is all about being in love is knowing what's running through the thoughts of her man's mind. That's why she asks what you're thinking when maybe it's nothing much at all.
Don't say that. Instead, take those moments to bring in some gentle humor with a compliment that breaks a smile across her face, and her romantic side will come alive in the happiest of ways.
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Aria Gmitter, M.S, M.F.A. is YourTango's Senior Editor of Horoscopes and Spirituality. She's an astrologer, numerologist, tarotist and theologian.