Weak People Who Avoid Responsibility Often Say These 11 Things When Confronted
Inside Creative House | Shutterstock Whether it's a coping mechanism for fears of rejection or the desire for immediate gratification, more people than ever are avoiding responsibility and accountability in their everyday lives, according to counselor Jamie Cannon. While it might offer a fleeting sense of comfort to make excuses or justify misbehavior, in the end, avoidance only amplifies inner turmoil and strains relationships.
These people will do whatever it takes to avoid harming their self-image or leaning into the discomfort of accountability. Weak people who avoid responsibility often say these specific things when confronted with these fears. From "it wasn't my fault" to "what about all that you've done?" they'll always be running from personal accountability.
Weak people who avoid responsibility often say these 11 things when confronted
1. 'I can do whatever I want'
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Oftentimes, people who struggle to take accountability in relationships also struggle to embrace responsibility in their personal lives. From indulging in unhealthy habits to expecting the world to reward them for their constant laziness, they live entitled lives.
While all of these things can be symptoms of larger concerns like depression or ADHD, an avoidance of responsibility can also be rooted in entitlement for certain people. They believe that their misguided autonomy — defined by phrases like "I can do whatever I want" — gives them the freedom to strain relationships and justify bad behavior when, in reality, it robs them of the ability to be independent.
They rely on other people's passiveness and vulnerability to take advantage, even if they're not conscious of it in the moment. They put their comfort first and rely on this strange sense of entitlement in conversations and relationships to avoid apologies and honesty.
2. 'That's not what I meant'
People who care most about their personal comfort and self-image may avoid accountability by gaslighting the people around them. Their words and language serve a specific purpose: to make other people feel doubtful about their own empowerment and to make them feel "crazy" for standing up for themselves or calling out their misbehavior.
Weak people who avoid responsibility rely on manipulating others in this way with phrases like "that's not what I meant" or "you're overreacting." They don't care in the moment if these actions are hurting others, as long as they're protected in their immaturity and carelessness.
3. 'You're twisting my words'
If a manipulative or insecure person can't avoid accountability or is pressured to apologize to someone they've hurt, they may try to change the narrative. They use phrases like "you're twisting my words" to paint themselves as the victim or attempt to change someone's memory of past events, all to improve their image and justify the behavior they're being called out for.
According to psychology professor John Sean Doyle, this behavior of changing narratives is also a way to improve their own personal image in their mind. The stories we tell ourselves change the way we think about ourselves, and if an insecure person can't take accountability or understand the pain they're causing to others, of course they're going to change the story to best suit their personal comfort.
4. 'Why do you always make me the bad guy?'
Whether it's a symptom of narcissism or a way of coping with insecurity, Berkeley Well-Being Institute argues that chronic victimhood is ingrained in the identities of people who evade accountability. Playing the victim and blame-shifting in situations where they're being called out is second nature — they don't believe that they're ever "in the wrong" and refuse to admit it.
Even if their victimhood is played up with phrases like "Why do you always make me the bad guy?" they'll do whatever it takes to garner sympathy for themselves and improve their self-image, even if it harms other people in the process.
5. 'I guess I can't do anything right'
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If they can't run away from accountability or gaslight other people into believing they're the victim, a weak person who refuses to take responsibility may say "I guess I can't do anything right" when confronted. Now, they're simply trying to protect their self-image and grasp at sympathy from others to safeguard their fragile ego.
Especially for narcissists, who portray a kind of grandiose sense of self to the world, but are actually compensating for inferiority and deep insecurity, this behavior is common. They need to be the center of attention, even if it means making fun of and manipulating others, so even when they're confronted for these behaviors, they still need people's reassurance and validation to feel secure.
6. 'I already said sorry'
According to psychology professor Dr. Karina Schumann, apologies are essential to protect our relationships and personal well-being, but there's a stark difference between a well-intentioned, genuine apology and a passive avoidant phrase. So, it's not surprising that weak people who avoid responsibility often rely on phrases like "I already said sorry" to protect themselves from criticism, even if their "apology" was insincere.
They don't mean their words, and it's clear in their behavior that they're actually justifying their actions by giving a half-intentional apology. Their empty "sorrys" are only a reminder to others of their entitlement.
7. 'Can we just move on?'
For someone who relies on positive attention and validation from others to feel secure in their identity, of course being called out for bad behavior feels completely disillusioning. They want to "just move on" from conflicts where they're being asked to take accountability, because they'd prefer to suppress concerns than be vulnerable and express them out loud.
They want to protect how other people perceive them, and if that means steamrolling over another person's hurt and concerns, they don't mind doing so.
8. 'It doesn't matter'
By making other people feel "crazy" for bringing up issues or holding them accountable, weak people who regularly avoid responsibility often say these things when confronted. "It doesn't matter" is simply their way of invalidating another person's concerns — making immediate forgiveness easier for them than actually apologizing.
Of course, forgiveness is important and required for personal well-being, but if it's met only when someone refuses to take accountability, it's not really helping — it's only sparking more tension and deep resentment.
9. 'I had no choice'
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People who refuse to take accountability will never admit that they have control or autonomy over their own life, especially things that aren't immediately comfortable or important to them. They expect everyone to solve their problems, protect their comfort, and place opportunities in their lives, without ever having to put in any actual effort.
That's what the phrase "I had no choice" stems from — people who refuse to take accountability latch onto their helplessness and craft vulnerability to make themselves feel better about inaction.
10. 'Everyone does this'
By lumping themselves into the general population or other people, they attempt to protect their own self-esteem and self-image. They can't possibly be held accountable for behaviors that everyone around them is doing and getting away with.
Similarly to how these manipulative people isolate others to make them more vulnerable, they cling to other people and try to form a misguided, misinterpreted community to protect themselves.
11. 'I'm just misunderstood'
If a narcissistic person, keen on seeking attention and validation from others, says something like "I'm just misunderstood" when they're confronted for bad behavior, what they really mean is "I'm annoyed that you're not accepting my skewed version of the story."
They're vulnerable if people can think for themselves and stand strong in the face of manipulative techniques like gaslighting, so they have to play the victim with phrases like this to protect their image.
Zayda Slabbekoorn is a senior editorial strategist with a bachelor's degree in social relations & policy and gender studies who focuses on psychology, relationships, self-help, and human interest stories.
