People With Zero Personality Almost Always Use These 11 Phrases When They Talk To You
GaudiLab | Shutterstock Most people would like to think they've got great personalities. Some see themselves as fun and outgoing, while others fancy themselves as interesting people with a lot of emotional depth. To others, however, it may seem like they have no personality at all, and it has a lot to do with the words and phrases they say regularly.
What makes someone seem lacking in personality may not be about who they are at their core, it may be just a few bad communication habits. After all, when people use phrases that indicate they aren't engaged with others or interested in them, it says more about their lack of personality than it does about the people they're disengaged from.
People with zero personality almost always use these 11 phrases when they talk to you
1. 'It is what it is'
Alliance Images | Shutterstock
Most people have heard or uttered the phrase, "It is what it is," in our lifetimes. On the surface, it's harmless, and in some circumstances it can be helpful. After all, you can't control what you can't control!
But constantly approaching life this way shows a lack of interest in how something negatively impacts others. Saying "it is what it is" also shows that the person has no interest in improving upon things that are less-than-ideal.
It's normal to react and to get phased by certain circumstances, and it's only human to get upset sometimes. Showcasing these emotions is how we connect with others, and how we're able to empathize with what someone else is going through.
Plus, suppressing emotions is never a good thing. Multiple studies have shown that emotional suppression leaves negative emotions intact while decreasing positive emotions. That is not a healthy emotional state to live in, and other people can sense it.
2. 'Whatever works'
Roman Samborskyi | Shutterstock
Some may think it's helpful to let another person lead, saying, "Whatever works for you," when asked about upcoming plans or outings. But constantly pinning the responsibility on others doesn't just show a lack of personality or preferences — it shows a lack of leadership. Worse, it can seem like you are too appeasing or too much of a doormat.
Refusing to offer opinions and input can frustrate those who are trying to make a productive plan. In a truly mutual friendship or relationship, everyone participates at varying levels at different times. Some days you'll be the leader, other days you may offer just a few words of input. That dynamic keeps life interesting.
Not only does participating fully in a group make life more fun for everyone involved, one study even found that collective decision-making is great for reducing emotional stress. And that's a win-win.
3. 'I guess so'
Krakenimages.com | Shutterstock
There's nothing more bland than saying, "I guess so," when asked a question. Not only does it show a lack of depth of thought, it can also open the door for miscommunications or misunderstandings. Worse, it can be used passive-aggressively, or simply come across as manipulative. Often, people take "I guess so" to mean something negative and make change plans or pull back to avoid misunderstandings or offense.
According to research, feeling misunderstood leads to higher rates of stress, lower rates of life satisfaction, and lower motivation. This is why clarity is a key part of communication. Saying, "I guess so" makes the other person guess how you think or feel, meaning they must interpret a person's wants and needs, which can be frustrating or even boring.
4. 'I can't complain too much'
fizkes | Shutterstock
The phrase, "I can't complain too much," can be very positive, and many people use it to say that all is going well without seeming boastful or like they're bragging about having good luck. But there are some people who use "can't complain" as a way of not having to discuss what's going on in their lives, which can seem overly detached or lacking in depth.
While using it here and there may not be an issue, people who use it seem like they have no personality. After all, the world is not always a pleasant place, and even the most fortunate people experience bad luck or tough times, times when perhaps they should complain — or at least be willing to talk about their challenges.
5. 'I'm not that picky'
fizkes | Shutterstock
Someone who says, "I'm not that picky" on a regular basis might not want to be seen as difficult, but often it simply seems likethey have no opinions or no personality of their own. As bad as that impression may be, that's not the worst of it.
The phrase, "I'm not that picky," can be a lot like the phrase "I hate drama"in that you get the strong sense the person is very picky (but doesn't want anyone to know) or that they thrive on interpersonal drama, but are unwilling to accept this about themselves.
Despite how it may seem to someone who says, "I'm not picky," individuality is just as important as being seen as easy-going. After all, being picky is a source of self-expressiona nd being true to yourself.
One study even found that living authentically is key to overall well-being. So, people should never be afraid to speak up and express their opinions, as it might just benefit them in the end.
6. 'I don't really care'
Antonio Guillem | Shutterstock
The phrase, "I don't care" shows a lack of compassion and personality. When someone uses this phrase, they are really saying, "This isn't important to me." And that can make someone seem apathetic or even unfeeling.
It's important for people to express interest in what others are doing. Even if they find it boring, they should do their best and try to show some interest. After all, the basis of great relationships (and a sign of a great personality) is interest in one another's thoughts, feelings and inner lives.
If they really do care, they should say it. After all, people know when others are being disingenuous, and saying "I don't really care" is a lie if you really do care. Eventually, resentment builds and relationships can be undermined.
7. 'I'm just here'
Antonio Guillem | Shutterstock
There's nothing more mood-crushing than someone who uses the phrase, "I'm just here" when others have gathered together for fun or to get something done. It tells others that they don't want to be there, and exposes a lack of consideration for others' time.
Even if it isn't the intention, saying this phrase shows an absence of enthusiasm or excitement, which comes off as having no personality or simply careless.
It's best to avoid using this phrase; instead, one should say what they really want to say. Here are a few simple examples: you're happy to be there, you're stressed, you hope you can help, you are excited for the company.
8. 'It's not worth arguing over'
Perfect Wave | Shutterstock
While it may seem helpful to say, "It's not even worth arguing over," this phrase often comes off as being avoidant, instead. Even worse, if someone feels passionately about a topic or issue and is met with "it's not worth arguing over," it feels like the other person is only thinking of themselves.
This type of mindset might indicate a lack of compassion, emotional intelligence, and awareness. It can also be a sign that someone is just not engaged, whether it's because of past negative experiences with arguing, or simple laziness. Regardless, someone who won't respectfully take a stance or engage often seems like they have no personality at all.
9. 'It's not a big deal'
fizkes | Shutterstock
When trying to help someone feel less guilty, ashamed or burdensome, saying, "It's not a big deal" can be helpful, especially if you truly mean it. You want them to know you are unbothered. In other situations, "no big deal" can come off as dismissive and cold.
Understand that human beings need connection to thrive; we need to feel understood and appreciated. Without this, we might feel cheated or left in the dust by those who are supposed to treasure us most.
Research into the brain showed the feelings of being understood tied to areas of the brain associated with "reward and social connection." Yet, when we say, "It's not a big deal," when something is a genuine big deal to someone else, we're disregarding their feelings and they likely feel misunderstood.
The same research showed that feeling misunderstood, like when someone said "it's not a big deal" when it clearly is, for example, is tied to the areas of the brain associated with "negative affect and social pain."
Even if it comes off as totally innocent, saying "it's not a big deal" can make someone seem dull.
10. 'It's not that deep'
Krakenimages | Shutterstock
This is a trendy phrase you'll often hear people use when they don't want to take something seriously, acting as if the other person is silly for having a concern or an opinion. While the person saying "it's not that deep" may think it makes them sound cool or aloof, they actually seem like they have no personality.
After all, people who are confident in who they are don't mind when some else disagrees with them. They can hear someone out, respect their opinion, and then choose whether they want to agree or disagree. That level of maturity is the foundation for an interesting, dynamic personality.
11. 'I'm not overly opinionated'
Antonio Guillem | Shutterstock
Everyone has their opinions, even if their passions fall in non-controversial areas. Someone may have an opinion over who should have won The Bachelor or who is the best quarterback in the NFL. Opinions, whether over big or small things, shape a person's personality and make them interesting to others.
People who say, "I'm not overly opinionated" are often perceived as lacking the ability to form their own opinions. When people who claim to be without opinions spend time with others who like to engage and have discussions on a variety of topics may feel that person is being inauthentic.
While being extremely outspoken about opinions can make someone seem abrasive, opinions are often what help bond people. Studies show that just knowing that others share the same opinion makes people feel better connected to a group, showcasing the importance of a person developing themselves and their ideologies.
Marielisa Reyes is a writer with a bachelor's in psychology who covers self-help, relationships, career, family, and astrology topics.
