11 Disrespectful Things People Do Nowadays Without Even Thinking
Andrii Iemelianenko / Shutterstock More than half of Americans say people have gotten ruder and more disrespectful in the past five years, according to a study from the Pew Research Center. From interruptions in conversations to a rise in self-centered behavior in relationships, there are many disrespectful things people do nowadays without even thinking that sabotage social connections, personal well-being, and relationships.
Even if our modern convenience-society urges people to prioritize their own comfort, time, and effort, there’s a lot of joy and value in opening yourselves up to others. Caring for people, supporting them through hard times, and stepping out of your comfort zone every once in a while to help someone in need.
Here are 11 disrespectful things people do nowadays without even thinking
1. Constantly using their phone
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People who regularly place more value on their phones than on the people around them, also known as “phubbing,” sabotage their daily interactions and relationships because of it. Not only do people tend to immediately feel disrespected when someone’s on their phone around them, but it also distracts from the conversation and encourages more negative social perceptions of that person.
It’s one of the disrespectful things people do nowadays without even thinking. They cope with awkward silence by scrolling, lean on their phones for distraction or entertainment, and strain their relationships by using technology as a crutch.
2. Canceling plans at the last minute
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According to a study published in the Personality and Individual Differences journal, people who cancel plans at the last-minute usually have “darker” personality traits, especially considering it’s usually because something “better” came along — whether that’s alone time at home or better, more fun plans.
They don’t mind lying to their friends, making excuses, or even pretending that their last-minute cancellations are a funny personality trait, especially if it means they get to consistently put their own convenience over respect in relationships.
It’s one of the disrespectful things people do nowadays without even thinking, because alongside rising rates of narcissism and selfishness, they’re only thinking about themselves and their own comfort.
3. Talking on the phone around others
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If someone made time in their busy schedule to hang out with you or is enjoying your company nearby, at least put in the effort of being present. If someone is constantly talking on the phone with someone else or FaceTiming when they’re right next to you, that’s not a humble brag of their social circle. It’s actually sheer disrespect.
Our personal development and relationship well-being grow through quality time, as a study published in the International Psychogeriatrics journal suggests, and that also means undivided attention. So, if someone is constantly using their phone, taking calls, or focusing on something else when you’re around, they’re being disrespectful, even if they’re not consciously aware of it.
4. Making plans in front of people who aren’t invited
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Even if it seems like an inevitability in a busy schedule to occasionally chat about social plans and logistics around other people, it’s possible to include an added layer of respect that ensures nobody feels left out or excluded. Feeling excluded can often feel like social rejection, with added, complex feelings of shame that are easily avoidable with small habits.
Don’t make plans in front of people you’re not going to invite. Don’t brag about how fun a party or gathering was in front of them either. Be intentional about what you share and how you plan. Otherwise, you’re at risk of disconnecting and disrespecting people in your daily routine.
5. Being late
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Even if people try to craft it as an eccentric, quirky personality trait today, being late is disrespectful, and that’s it. Unless you’re overly communicative about being late without making excuses or making it a regular pattern, showing up late disrespects the person who made time for you amid their own chaotic schedule.
It’s not considerate and makes people feel like you don’t care enough to do the little things for them, like managing your time. From work meetings to personal dinner reservations with friends, keep your commitments. Punctuality is more powerful than you realize.
6. Interrupting people
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While interrupting people isn’t always a sign of self-entitlement or malicious intentions, according to relationship expert Andy Lopata, a rise in modern selfishness can influence an uptick in these kinds of conversational behaviors.
Of course, sometimes this behavior is tied to neurodivergence or social anxiety, but other times, it’s simply a sign of a person who cares more about crafting their own self-image and attention to make space for others.
It’s one of the disrespectful things people do nowadays without even thinking. They interrupt people, craft space for attention-seeking behaviors, and try to one-up everyone around them for a sense of internal security, at the expense of connections and relationships.
7. Consistently ignoring texts
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If someone clings to the self-proclaimed identity of being a “bad texter,” chances are they just don’t care enough to respond. Of course, people have busy lives and may struggle with avoidance in the face of larger mental health struggles, but if it feels like someone is always making excuses for leaving you on read or declining your call, it’s disrespectful.
If someone takes time out of their day to call you or send you a text message, the least you could do is respond with something like, “Hey, I’m busy right now. I’ll connect with you later today.”
8. Talking loudly in shared spaces
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Whether it’s talking on speakerphone in a quiet coffee shop or having a loud conversation when it’s clear other people are trying to focus, having a lack of social awareness in public spaces is one of the disrespectful things people do nowadays without even thinking.
They care more about their own comfort and convenience than crafting a respectful demeanor for the people around them. Especially if it’s people they perceive to be lower in “status” than themselves, from strangers to service workers, disrespectful people will regularly put themselves first at the expense of everyone around them.
9. Not taking accountability for everything
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While a lack of accountability often comes up in big ways in relationships, like blame-shifting or playing the victim, it’s just as possible for someone to make excuses in everyday life, from showing up late to being rude to a stranger.
They refuse to be wrong about anything, trying to protect their own ego and self-image, even if it actively disrespects the people around them. By embracing accountability with an aura of respect and intention, we can craft spaces where other people and ourselves feel supported. But when we put our own comfort and convenience first, it’s easy to sabotage all of these things.
10. Multitasking all the time
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According to a 2024 study, multitasking can often impair cognitive abilities like concentration and sabotage productivity, whether it’s in an environment like the workplace or at home with loved ones. So, if someone is constantly multitasking, often because of procrastination, a lack of effort, or poor time management skills, they’re not only sabotaging personal well-being, but also the quality of work or attention they have for others.
That’s why multitasking is one of the disrespectful things people do nowadays without even thinking. For many, it’s not a malicious action, but rather a product of their chaotic lives without a moment to pause and think about task management, time, or intentionality.
11. Making assumptions about silence
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When people make assumptions about another person’s silence, it’s no surprise that they often disrespect people, whether they realize it or not.
From assuming someone’s lack of confidence is an admission of guilt or passivity to immediately chalking up an introverted person as mean or boring, disrespectful people often adopt and accept their own narratives of the people around them, without putting any effort or intention into understanding reality.
Zayda Slabbekoorn is a senior editorial strategist with a bachelor’s degree in social relations & policy and gender studies who focuses on psychology, relationships, self-help, and human interest stories.
