If You Notice These 11 Behaviors, You're Dealing With A Low-Value Person
They're more subtle and unsuspecting than you might think.
dabyki.nadya | Shutterstock Everyone's entitled to their own set of values and are worthy of respect for being their authentic selves, but sometimes, there are certain habits, behaviors, and mentalities that signal someone is a truly "low-value" person. From the social interactions they have with others, to the body language and nonverbal cues they indulge in, and even their personal routines from day-to-day, if you notice these behaviors, you're dealing with a low-value person.
Not only are they unlikely to care about your personal well-being and happiness, they'll go to any measure to secure and protect their own. Compared to their "high-value" counterparts that most people admire and strive to be, low-value people lack the kinds of traits and behaviors — like empathy, compassion, and loyalty — that bond others and craft healthy connections and relationships.
If you notice these 11 behaviors, you're dealing with a low-value person
1. They lack ambition
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While ambition, according to a study from Personality and Individual Differences, can be a "double-edged sword" — pushing people toward traditional career and personal success, but also occasionally influencing people to take short cuts and make impulsive decisions — lacking it is often one of the signs of a low-value person.
Of course, there are a number of external factors that can push people toward laziness, like psychiatrist Neel Burton argues, from mental health struggles to a fear of success, but when someone intentionally lives in their comfort zone and avoids personal development — especially at the expense of themselves and others — it could be a red flag.
They're not only unwilling to open themselves up to opportunities and growth, they tend to indulge lazy behaviors in their connections and relationships. From avoiding conflict and hard decisions, to making easy and impulsive decisions, and even sacrificing trust and honesty for comfort, low-value people who lack ambition for change can put other people's well-being at risk.
2. They're never paying attention
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According to a study from the American Management Association, even subtle body language shifts — like turning away from someone when you're speaking or looking at your phone — can make you seem more disengaged in a social interaction. If you're not actively listening, using engaging nonverbal cues, or making eye contact, you're not giving other people space to feel heard and valued.
Of course, many of these engaging behaviors don't even have to be a big commitment. Experts from Michigan State University argue that even making eye contact with someone for 50% of a conversation is powerful enough to make someone feel heard and appreciated.
If you notice these behaviors in conversations, chances are you're dealing with a low-value person. Whether it's entitlement, narcissism, or someone who plainly thinks they're better than everyone else, if someone isn't giving you time, space, or engagement in a conversation consistently, especially after you've expressed your needs, chances are they don't care enough about your well-being or happiness to do so.
3. They sabotage other people's happiness
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Whether it's dismissing their excitement, "one-upping" their successes, or invalidating their achievements in public spaces, sabotaging other people's happiness is one of the behaviors of a low-value person. They care more about protecting their misguided superiority and control over a situation than truly showing up to support and love other people.
For narcissistic people — who often engage in this kind of behavior often — it's a coping mechanism for their own internal discomfort and insecurity. They believe that making other people feel self-doubt and discomfort will give them space to ignore and hide their own.
4. They never take accountability
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Whether it's never apologizing for hurting other people's feelings or failing to take responsibility for a mistake at work, a low-value person will always put their own misguided beliefs about failure, confidence, and the social hierarchy above accountability.
Experts like clinical psychologist Leon F. Seltzer suggest these kinds of low-value people will always shift the blame toward others, paint themselves as the victim, and avoid taking responsibility for their own actions to avoid facing their truth. They view making mistakes and needing to apologize as a fault or failure, making them less powerful and "in control" in social situations, even if the opposite is really true.
5. They never let go of control
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According to experts like professor Preston Ni, many people who struggle with internal insecurity feel drawn to seek control from others, social interactions, and their routine to cope. They feel like they can't control their own emotional turmoil, so they resort to gaslighting and blame shifting behaviors to make other people feel as dysregulated and doubtful as themselves.
Even subtle things that may seem kind can be signs of a low-value person — like fake kindness to take control of a conversation or subtle gaslighting phrases like "you're overreacting" to ensure people don't call them out for their toxic behaviors.
6. They criticize people without reason
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While mentorship and constructive criticism can be healthy for building relationships and prompting personal growth, low-value people tend to turn away from accepting feedback from others and often develop a hypercritical mentality when judging others.
Psychologist Nick Wignall even argues that people with emotional intelligence and true confidence will uplift people, even in the most casual passing conversations, but low-value people often do the opposite — sometimes entirely subconsciously.
Whether it's gaslighting, talking poorly about people behind their back, judging someone's appearance and skills, or criticizing their work while doing none of their own, if you notice these behaviors, you're dealing with a low-value person.
7. They disrespect people's boundaries
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Even after boundaries have been expressed and communicated, low-value people disrespect them often, sometimes in little ways to test people's confidence and self-assuredness. In many cases, overlooking people's needs and testing boundaries is how people manipulate others, trying to spark self-doubt and emotional turmoil in others to make them easier to control.
Low-value people are not interested in helping others feel heard, supported, or loved without conditions — they're more committed to protecting their own sense of comfort and coping with their insecurities.
8. They're passive-aggressive
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According to therapist Loriann Oberlin, passive-aggressive people often sabotage trust in their relationships and erode strong bonds in their lives. Not only that, their passive-aggressive language tends to have negative effects on their own self-esteem, sparking a cycle of misguidedly coping with internal turmoil at the expense of the people around them.
From making backhanded compliments, to embarrassing people in social situations, and using condescending language to get what they want, if you notice these behaviors, you're dealing with a low-value person.
9. They weaponize ignorance and incompetence
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From pretending not to understand what someone's saying in vulnerable situations to avoiding household labor by feigning incompetence, if you notice these behaviors, you're likely dealing with a low-value person. To avoid needing to take accountability or step outside their comfort zone, they'd prefer to pass off emotional and literal labor to others at the expense of balance and trust in their relationships.
According to a study from Psychological Bulletin, many people also feign ignorance as an excuse to act selfishly or in their best interests. If they pretend like they don't understand what someone needs or what their boundaries mean, they can avoid taking accountability when they intentionally disrespect them.
10. They always play the victim
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While it's true that chronic stress, anxiety, and loneliness can encourage people to adopt behaviors to cope — like a sense of chronic victimhood or avoidance — that they might never typically engage in, oftentimes always playing the victim is a means for people to gain control.
Rather than apologizing for hurting others or taking accountability for their own actions, behavior, and language, they paint other people to be the perpetrators for their own ignorance or cruelty. While many of these things can be subtle — in social interactions and conversations — if you notice these behaviors, you're likely dealing with a low-value person.
11. They're superficial
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Many people who only form superficial connections and relationships with other people to get what they want lack the depth that high value people boast. They don't have the same capacity for vulnerability, empathy, or depth that people with emotional intelligence and deep-rooted confidence do, so they're forced to rely on surface-level conversations and small talk.
According to a study from the American Psychological Association, most people yearn for deep connections and more meaningful conversations in their day-to-day lives, which is why it's obvious when you're talking to someone only capable of superficiality. It's not always a sign that someone is a bad person, but it could be a sign that they lack the skills, internal security, and emotional regulation skills to be vulnerable and open.
Zayda Slabbekoorn is a staff writer with a bachelor's degree in social relations & policy and gender studies who focuses on psychology, relationships, self-help, and human interest stories.
